Episodes

  • Ep 73: We’re Divorced!

    Ep 73: We’re Divorced!
    Feb 13 2025
    In this raw and honest comeback episode ofUnlearned, Jaime and CA open up about their recent divorce and journey of healing. They discuss unlearning old patterns and navigating neurodivergence while finding a balance between intellectualizing pain and truly feeling their emotions. With candid vulnerability and humor, they invite listeners to join them on a path toward new beginnings.Notes:Hosts return after a long hiatus following intense personal healing.They discuss their recent divorce as a transformative, painful step.The conversation centers on unlearning old relational patterns.They explore how neurodivergence shapes their need for structure and emotional processing.A key theme is balancing the urge to intellectualize pain with the need to feel it.Vulnerability and raw emotion are embraced throughout the episode.The hosts highlight the importance of setting healthy boundaries.They share personal anecdotes that reveal layers of trauma and growth.The dialogue examines the interplay between physical survival and emotional well-being.They critique oversimplified self-help advice in favor of honest self-discovery.The episode invites listeners to join them on a journey toward new beginnings.Future episodes promise a blend of deep introspection and lighter moments.Links:Would you like CA to coach you?https://tinyurl.com/ybt3jwatOrder Jaime’s book “TOXIC RELATIONSHIP RECOVERY,” today! It is available in paperback, as an audiobook (read by Jaime, herself), and as an e-book.https://bit.ly/43Ka8kESupport the podcast by joining our Coffee Fiend club:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.patreon.com/unlearned⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠FREEBIE! Intention Prompts:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠http://tinyurl.com/Intentionprompts⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠CA’s Voxer Coaching:http://tinyurl.com/434fs8zdJaime’s Coaching:https://recollectedself.com/workwithmeFollow the podcast on Instagram:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.instagram.com/theunlearnedpodcast/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Jaime’s Instagram:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.instagram.com/recollectedself/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Jaime’s TikTok:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.tiktok.com/@recollectedself⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠CA’s Instagram:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.secure.instagram.com/embracingdivergence/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠CA’s Tiktok:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.tiktok.com/@embracingdivergence⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Email us topics/suggestions: ⁠unlearned@recollectedself.com⁠International Suicide Hotlines:https://blog.opencounseling.com/suicide-hotlinesNational Suicide Hotline: Call:988 Text: 988Website:https://988lifeline.org/?utm_source=google&utm_medium=web&utm_campaign=oneboxLifeline Options For Deaf + Hard of Hearing For TTY Users: Use your preferred relay service or dial 711 then 988.Over 50 Club!Amanda B.Plamen S.Rachel S. (Her Petstagram: @mini_carlo_pinscher)
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    57 mins
  • Ep 72: Can People Pleasers Consent?

    Ep 72: Can People Pleasers Consent?
    Jun 24 2024
    We hear a lot about consent in a sexual context, but what about the other places it shows up? Jaime and CA explore the nuance of consent and what it means in regards to our relationships and how we show up for our partners, friends, and family. Also - Come to our first ever in person retreat “The Spiritual Soma Release Retreat:” buy.stripe.com/14k5ldd0n1tQ51e6oF Support the podcast by joining our Coffee Fiend club: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.patreon.com/unlearned⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Order Jaime’s book “TOXIC RELATIONSHIP RECOVERY,” today! It is available in paperback, as an audiobook (read by Jaime, herself), and as an e-book. https://bit.ly/43Ka8kE Notes: We’re back! Our first ever in person retreat! FRIES in Consent Where curiosity and enthusiasm come into play Fuck yes vs yes energy How our consent is perceived Why people resist “I guess” Where people pleasing comes into play Strategies to consenting properly Links: Support the podcast by joining our Coffee Fiend club:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.patreon.com/unlearned⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ FREEBIE! Intention Prompts:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ http://tinyurl.com/Intentionprompts⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ CA’s Voxer Coaching: http://tinyurl.com/434fs8zd Jaime’s Coaching: https://recollectedself.com/workwithme Follow the podcast on Instagram:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.instagram.com/theunlearnedpodcast/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Jaime’s Instagram:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.instagram.com/recollectedself/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Jaime’s TikTok:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.tiktok.com/@recollectedself⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ CA’s Instagram:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.secure.instagram.com/embracingdivergence/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ CA’s Tiktok:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.tiktok.com/@embracingdivergence⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Email us topics/suggestions: ⁠unlearned@recollectedself.com⁠ International Suicide Hotlines: https://blog.opencounseling.com/suicide-hotlinesNational Suicide Hotline: Call:988Text: 988 Website:https://988lifeline.org/?utm_source=google&utm_medium=web&utm_campaign=onebox Lifeline Options For Deaf + Hard of Hearing For TTY Users: Use your preferred relay service or dial 711 then 988. Over 50 Club! Amanda B. Plamen S. Rachel S. (Her Petstagram: @mini_carlo_pinscher)
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    47 mins
  • Ep 71: I Didn't Have a Childhood

    Ep 71: I Didn't Have a Childhood
    Jun 3 2024

    Social media is filled with nostalgia and it can be a lot of fun. But what happens when you look at the shared childhood experiences of others and think to yourself, “that wasn’t me?” Join CA and Jaime as they explore what life looks like for those of us who have had to, more or less, raise ourselves. Is being a latchkey kid something we need to heal from? Listen in and find out.

    Support the podcast by joining our Coffee Fiend club: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.patreon.com/unlearned⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

    Come to our first-ever in-person retreat: buy.stripe.com/14k5ldd0n1tQ51e6oF

    Order Jaime’s book “TOXIC RELATIONSHIP RECOVERY,” today! It is available in paperback, as an audiobook (read by Jaime, herself), and as an e-book. https://bit.ly/43Ka8kE

    Notes:

    • Jaime’s struggles with memory around her childhood

    • CA’s struggles with not having a carefree childhood

    • What happens when you don’t remember your childhood like other people do

    • Parentification - what it is and what it means

    • How parentification affects development

    • Latchkey kids and how they cope

    • Why we need to connect with ourselves and find our needs

    • Healing from our childhood trauma

    • Understanding and embracing your inner child

    • Using your inner child was a parent

    Links:

    • Support the podcast by joining our Coffee Fiend club:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.patreon.com/unlearned⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

    • FREEBIE! Intention Prompts:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ http://tinyurl.com/Intentionprompts⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

    • CA’s Voxer Coaching: http://tinyurl.com/434fs8zd

    • Jaime’s Coaching: https://recollectedself.com/workwithme

    • Follow the podcast on Instagram:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.instagram.com/theunlearnedpodcast/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

    • Jaime’s Instagram:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.instagram.com/recollectedself/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

    • Jaime’s TikTok:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.tiktok.com/@recollectedself⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

    • CA’s Instagram:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.secure.instagram.com/embracingdivergence/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

    • CA’s Tiktok:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.tiktok.com/@embracingdivergence⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

    • Email us topics/suggestions: ⁠unlearned@recollectedself.com⁠

    • International Suicide Hotlines: https://blog.opencounseling.com/suicide-hotlinesNational Suicide Hotline: Call:988Text: 988

    • Website:https://988lifeline.org/?utm_source=google&utm_medium=web&utm_campaign=onebox

    • Lifeline Options For Deaf + Hard of Hearing For TTY Users: Use your preferred relay service or dial 711 then 988.

    Over 50 Club!

    • Amanda B.

    • Plamen S.

    • Rachel S. (Her Petstagram: @mini_carlo_pinscher)
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    59 mins
  • Ep 70: Anxious-Attachment (Part 2)

    Ep 70: Anxious-Attachment (Part 2)
    May 25 2024

    Jaime and CA continue their series on insecure attachment styles with a discussion on the anxious-attachment style. This time, Jaime opens up about her experiences as someone who naturally falls under this category.

    Support the podcast by joining our Coffee Fiend club: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.patreon.com/unlearned⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

    Order Jaime’s book “TOXIC RELATIONSHIP RECOVERY,” today! It is available in paperback, as an audiobook (read by Jaime, herself), and as an e-book. https://bit.ly/43Ka8kE

    Part 1

    Ep. 39: The Justification Trap

    Notes:

    • The most difficult part of attachment healing

    • How anxious-attachment types deal with discomfort in a relationship

    • The signs of an anxious-attached person

    • Why anxious attachment starts with “never being good enough”

    • Roleplaying anxious-attachment

    • What causes anxious-attachment people to spiral

    • Steps you can take to heal from being anxious-attachment

    • The importance of clear and direct communication

    Links:

    • Support the podcast by joining our Coffee Fiend club:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.patreon.com/unlearned⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

    • FREEBIE! Intention Prompts:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ http://tinyurl.com/Intentionprompts⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

    • CA’s Voxer Coaching: http://tinyurl.com/434fs8zd

    • Jaime’s Coaching: https://recollectedself.com/workwithme

    • Follow the podcast on Instagram:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.instagram.com/theunlearnedpodcast/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

    • Jaime’s Instagram:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.instagram.com/recollectedself/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

    • Jaime’s TikTok:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.tiktok.com/@recollectedself⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

    • CA’s Instagram:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.secure.instagram.com/embracingdivergence/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

    • CA’s Tiktok:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.tiktok.com/@embracingdivergence⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

    • Email us topics/suggestions: ⁠unlearned@recollectedself.com⁠

    • International Suicide Hotlines: https://blog.opencounseling.com/suicide-hotlinesNational Suicide Hotline: Call:988Text: 988

    • Website:https://988lifeline.org/?utm_source=google&utm_medium=web&utm_campaign=onebox

    • Lifeline Options For Deaf + Hard of Hearing For TTY Users: Use your preferred relay service or dial 711 then 988.

    Over 50 Club!

    • Amanda B.

    • Plamen S.

    • Rachel S. (Her Petstagram: @mini_carlo_pinscher)
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    1 hr and 4 mins
  • Ep 69: Avoidant-Attachment (Part 1)

    Ep 69: Avoidant-Attachment (Part 1)
    May 6 2024

    We’re back!

    CA and Jaime return from their hiatus with a series on insecure attachment styles. In this episode, they explore the Avoidant-Attachment style both from a clinical standpoint and from a personal standpoint via CA’s experiences.

    Support the podcast by joining our Coffee Fiend club: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.patreon.com/unlearned⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

    Order Jaime’s book “TOXIC RELATIONSHIP RECOVERY,” today! It is available in paperback, as an audiobook (read by Jaime, herself), and as an e-book. https://bit.ly/43Ka8kE

    Notes:

    • Happy Anniversary! We’re back!

    • Please consider supporting the show

    • Defining the four main attraction styles (Secure attachment, Anxious-ambivalent attachment, Anxious-avoidant, and Disorganized/disoriented attachment)

    • Where all insecure attachment styles come from

    • How does someone develop avoidant-attachment?

    • Why opposite attachment styles seem to be attracted to one another

    • CA’s journey as someone with avoidant-attachment style

    • How avoidant-attachment shows up in relationships

    • How to heal and form a healthy attachment style

    Links:

    • Support the podcast by joining our Coffee Fiend club:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.patreon.com/unlearned⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

    • FREEBIE! Intention Prompts:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ http://tinyurl.com/Intentionprompts⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

    • CA’s Voxer Coaching: http://tinyurl.com/434fs8zd

    • Jaime’s Coaching: https://recollectedself.com/workwithme

    • Follow the podcast on Instagram:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.instagram.com/theunlearnedpodcast/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

    • Jaime’s Instagram:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.instagram.com/recollectedself/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

    • Jaime’s TikTok:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.tiktok.com/@recollectedself⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

    • CA’s Instagram:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.secure.instagram.com/embracingdivergence/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

    • CA’s Tiktok:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.tiktok.com/@embracingdivergence⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

    • Email us topics/suggestions: ⁠unlearned@recollectedself.com⁠

    • International Suicide Hotlines: https://blog.opencounseling.com/suicide-hotlinesNational Suicide Hotline: Call:988Text: 988

    • Website:https://988lifeline.org/?utm_source=google&utm_medium=web&utm_campaign=onebox

    • Lifeline Options For Deaf + Hard of Hearing For TTY Users: Use your preferred relay service or dial 711 then 988.

    Over 50 Club!

    • Amanda B.

    • Plamen S.

    • Rachel S. (Her Petstagram: @mini_carlo_pinscher)
    Show More Show Less
    1 hr and 9 mins
  • Ep 68: Dissociation and Disengagement

    Ep 68: Dissociation and Disengagement
    Dec 20 2023
    Are dissociation and disengagement the same thing? Is it ever healthier to more or less walk away to protect yourself? In this episode, CA and Jaime explore both dissociation and disengagement, using the analogy of a snowstorm. Join us to discover when we need to tough it out, put on a coat, or stay inside. Support the podcast by joining our Coffee Fiend club:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.patreon.com/unlearned Order Jaime’s book “TOXIC RELATIONSHIP RECOVERY,” today! It is available in paperback, as an audiobook (read by Jaime, herself), and as an e-book. https://bit.ly/43Ka8kE Notes: Emotional Support water bottles and missing walls The difference between consciously and respectfully disengaging and dissociation Is there a way to healthily disengage when there is too much pain? The mistakes we make while learning to protect ourselves in a good way What happens if the other person isn’t safe Learning to trust your limits in a healthy way Links: Support the podcast by joining our Coffee Fiend club:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.patreon.com/unlearned⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ FREEBIE! Intention Prompts:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ http://tinyurl.com/Intentionprompts⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ CA’s Voxer Coaching: http://tinyurl.com/434fs8zd Jaime’s Coaching: https://recollectedself.com/workwithme Follow the podcast on Instagram:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.instagram.com/theunlearnedpodcast/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Jaime’s Instagram:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.instagram.com/recollectedself/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Jaime’s TikTok:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.tiktok.com/@recollectedself⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ CA’s Instagram:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.secure.instagram.com/embracingdivergence/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ CA’s Tiktok:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.tiktok.com/@embracingdivergence⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Email us topics/suggestions: ⁠unlearned@recollectedself.com⁠ International Suicide Hotlines: https://blog.opencounseling.com/suicide-hotlinesNational Suicide Hotline: Call:988Text: 988 Website:https://988lifeline.org/?utm_source=google&utm_medium=web&utm_campaign=onebox Lifeline Options For Deaf + Hard of Hearing For TTY Users: Use your preferred relay service or dial 711 then 988. Over 50 Club! Amanda B. Plamen S. Rachel S. (Her Petstagram: @mini_carlo_pinscher)
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    58 mins
  • Ep 67: Recalibrating our Thresholds

    Ep 67: Recalibrating our Thresholds
    Nov 27 2023

    We all know that healing isn’t linear, but there does tend to be a moment when a corner is turned - where we begin to live our life again. What do we do then? Season 1 of the show focused on healing and trauma recovery. Join Jaime and CA as they introduce Season 2, which will focus on what happens after.

    Support the podcast by joining our Coffee Fiend club: https://www.patreon.com/unlearned

    Order Jaime’s book “TOXIC RELATIONSHIP RECOVERY,” today! It is available in paperback, as an audiobook (read by Jaime, herself), and as an e-book. https://bit.ly/43Ka8kE

    Notes:

    • Introducing Season 2 - Life After Healing

    • What trauma healing really looks like

    • Societal beliefs and trauma recovery

    • Why should you learn and then honor your thresholds

    • How it feels to shift out of survival mode

    • How to approach recovery safely

    • Honoring your body and mind during the recovery process

    Links:

    • Support the podcast by joining our Coffee Fiend club:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.patreon.com/unlearned⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

    • FREEBIE! Intention Prompts:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ http://tinyurl.com/Intentionprompts⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

    • Follow the podcast on Instagram:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.instagram.com/theunlearnedpodcast/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

    • Jaime’s Instagram:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.instagram.com/recollectedself/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

    • Jaime’s TikTok:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.tiktok.com/@recollectedself⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

    • CA’s Instagram:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.secure.instagram.com/embracingdivergence/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

    • CA’s Tiktok:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.tiktok.com/@embracingdivergence⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

    • Email us topics/suggestions: ⁠unlearned@recollectedself.com⁠

    • International Suicide Hotlines: https://blog.opencounseling.com/suicide-hotlinesNational Suicide Hotline: Call:988Text: 988

    • Website:https://988lifeline.org/?utm_source=google&utm_medium=web&utm_campaign=onebox

    • Lifeline Options For Deaf + Hard of Hearing For TTY Users: Use your preferred relay service or dial 711 then 988.

    Over 50 Club!

    • Amanda B.

    • Plamen S.

    • Rachel S. (Her Petstagram: @mini_carlo_pinscher)
    Show More Show Less
    50 mins
  • Ep 66: Do they tolerate you?

    Ep 66: Do they tolerate you?
    Nov 13 2023

    In this episode, CA and Jaime explore how relationships can serve as protective factors for trauma processing and healing. Especially relationships in which we are not merely tolerated, but rather accepted and, ideally, celebrated.

    Support the podcast by joining our Coffee Fiend club: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.patreon.com/unlearned⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

    Order Jaime’s book “TOXIC RELATIONSHIP RECOVERY,” today! It is available in paperback, as an audiobook (read by Jaime, herself), and as an e-book. https://bit.ly/43Ka8kE

    Notes:

    • Sweater weather!

    • Changing energy and changing seasons

    • What are protective factors and how do they affect us?

    • Beginning the process of processing trauma

    • How relationships can be protective factors for trauma processing

    • What normal relationships look like

    • The importance of knowing whether you are being tolerated, accepted, or celebrated in a relationship

    Links:

    • Support the podcast by joining our Coffee Fiend club:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.patreon.com/unlearned⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

    • FREEBIE! Intention Prompts:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ http://tinyurl.com/Intentionprompts⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

    • Follow the podcast on Instagram:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.instagram.com/theunlearnedpodcast/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

    • Jaime’s Instagram:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.instagram.com/recollectedself/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

    • Jaime’s TikTok:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.tiktok.com/@recollectedself⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

    • CA’s Instagram:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.secure.instagram.com/embracingdivergence/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

    • CA’s Tiktok:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.tiktok.com/@embracingdivergence⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

    • Email us topics/suggestions: ⁠unlearned@recollectedself.com⁠

    • International Suicide Hotlines: https://blog.opencounseling.com/suicide-hotlinesNational Suicide Hotline: Call:988Text: 988

    • Website:https://988lifeline.org/?utm_source=google&utm_medium=web&utm_campaign=onebox

    • Lifeline Options For Deaf + Hard of Hearing For TTY Users: Use your preferred relay service or dial 711 then 988.

    Over 50 Club!

    • Amanda B.

    • Plamen S.

    • Rachel S. (Her Petstagram: @mini_carlo_pinscher)
    Show More Show Less
    49 mins