Covert narcissism recovery often shows up quietly—through internal safety, self-trust, and a nervous system that no longer lives on high alert.

Many survivors wonder how to tell whether they’re actually healing, especially when there’s no closure, no apology, and no clear “finish line.” This episode shifts the focus away from the covert narcissist and back to you—helping you understand the subtle but powerful signs that healing is taking root.

In this episode, we explore:

• Why healing isn’t a milestone, but a shift in internal safety

• How recovery continues even without closure or acknowledgment

• What it means to feel safer inside your own body and mind

• The connection between nervous system regulation and healing

• How self-talk changes as recovery progresses

• Why perfectionism fades as internal safety grows

• How emotions stop feeling like emergencies and become information

• Three simple check-ins to stay focused on your healing path: body, thoughts, and feelings

This episode is for anyone recovering from covert narcissistic abuse who wants reassurance, clarity, and grounded guidance on what healing actually looks like—without waiting for anyone else to change.

00:00 Understanding Healing from Covert Narcissism
02:43 The Importance of Internal Safety
06:25 Recognizing Signs of Healing
09:39 Practicing Self-Compassion and Acceptance
12:54 Honoring Your Limits and Emotions
16:30 Distinguishing Healing from Numbness
17:52 Practical Steps for Healing

THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY RENEE SWANSON, COVERT NARCISSISM PODCAST, AND CNG LIFE COACHING IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT TO BE USED FOR DIAGNOSIS PURPOSES AND IS NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR CLINICAL CARE. PLEASE CONSULT A HEALTH CARE PROVIDER FOR GUIDANCE SPECIFIC TO YOUR CASE.

THIS MATERIAL DISCUSSES NARCISSISM IN GENERAL. RENEE SHARES STORIES FROM HER PERSONAL EXPERIENCES AS WELL AS FROM THOSE SHE HAS TALKED WITH FOR SEVERAL YEARS. HER MATERIAL DOES NOT CLAIM THAT ANY SPECIFIC PERSON HAS NARCISSISM AND SHOULD NOT BE USED TO REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON AS HAVING NARCISSISM. PERMISSION IS NOT GRANTED TO LINK TO OR REPOST THIS MATERIAL TO SUPPORT AN ALLEGATION OR SUPPORT A CLAIM THAT ANY SPECIFIC PERSON IS A NARCISSIST. THAT WOULD BE AN UNAUTHORIZED MISUSE OF THE MATERIAL AND INFORMATION PROVIDED.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Covert narcissism and trauma quietly teach adults and children that silence feels safer than honesty.

If you’ve noticed yourself going quiet, choosing your words carefully, or avoiding hard conversations altogether — or you’re watching your children withdraw, shut down, or stop sharing — this episode explains why that happens and what safety actually has to do with healing.

In this episode, we explore:

• Why people stop talking in emotionally unsafe relationships

• How covert narcissistic dynamics punish honesty without obvious aggression

• The different types of safety required for healing (physical, emotional, psychological, and conversational)

• How children learn when it is — and isn’t — safe to speak

• Everyday examples of unsafe vs. safe responses in adult and parent-child conversations

• Why silence is often a trauma response, not a lack of caring

• What begins to change when safety is slowly restored

This episode is for anyone who has lived in the confusion of covert narcissism, emotional abuse, or chronic invalidation — and for parents who want to understand what helps their children feel safe enough to heal and speak again.

THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY RENEE SWANSON, COVERT NARCISSISM PODCAST, AND CNG LIFE COACHING IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT TO BE USED FOR DIAGNOSIS PURPOSES AND IS NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR CLINICAL CARE. PLEASE CONSULT A HEALTH CARE PROVIDER FOR GUIDANCE SPECIFIC TO YOUR CASE.

THIS MATERIAL DISCUSSES NARCISSISM IN GENERAL. RENEE SHARES STORIES FROM HER PERSONAL EXPERIENCES AS WELL AS FROM THOSE SHE HAS TALKED WITH FOR SEVERAL YEARS. HER MATERIAL DOES NOT CLAIM THAT ANY SPECIFIC PERSON HAS NARCISSISM AND SHOULD NOT BE USED TO REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON AS HAVING NARCISSISM. PERMISSION IS NOT GRANTED TO LINK TO OR REPOST THIS MATERIAL TO SUPPORT AN ALLEGATION OR SUPPORT A CLAIM THAT ANY SPECIFIC PERSON IS A NARCISSIST. THAT WOULD BE AN UNAUTHORIZED MISUSE OF THE MATERIAL AND INFORMATION PROVIDED.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

In Part 1, we uncovered the surprising physical symptoms of trauma that often go unnoticed — the jaw tension, the tinnitus, the eye twitching, the constant bracing your body learned to do in order to survive covert narcissistic abuse.

In Part 2, we continue that conversation by focusing on three symptoms that confuse survivors the most:

• chest tightness — that “heart armor” feeling that makes it hard to breathe

• digestive issues — nausea, bloating, IBS patterns, or a stomach that shuts down under stress

• sleep disturbances — difficulty falling asleep, nighttime hyperarousal, and waking in panic

These symptoms are some of the most deeply misunderstood — and often dismissed by medical providers who see “normal” test results but don’t understand trauma physiology.

This episode breaks down why these symptoms happen, what your nervous system is trying to communicate through them, and how these reactions form in unsafe emotional environments.

We’ll also explore the deeper theme underlying it all:
Your body communicates through discomfort.
Just like hunger isn’t a malfunction, your trauma symptoms aren’t malfunctions either — they are messages.

Part 2 gives clarity, validation, and the beginning steps for understanding what your body has been trying to tell you for years.

DISCLAIMER: THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY RENEE SWANSON, COVERT NARCISSISM PODCAST, AND CNG LIFE COACHING IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT TO BE USED FOR DIAGNOSIS PURPOSES AND NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR CLINICAL CARE. PLEASE CONSULT A HEALTH CARE PROVIDER FOR GUIDANCE SPECIFIC TO YOUR CASE.

THIS MATERIAL DISCUSSES NARCISSISM IN GENERAL. RENEE SHARES STORIES FROM HER PERSONAL EXPERIENCES AS WELL AS FROM THOSE SHE HAS TALKED WITH FOR SEVERAL YEARS. HER MATERIAL DOES NOT CLAIM THAT ANY SPECIFIC PERSON HAS NARCISSISM AND SHOULD NOT BE USED TO REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON AS HAVING NARCISSISM. PERMISSION IS NOT GRANTED TO LINK TO OR REPOST THIS MATERIAL TO SUPPORT AN ALLEGATION OR SUPPORT A CLAIM THAT ANY SPECIFIC PERSON IS A NARCISSIST. THAT WOULD BE AN UNAUTHORIZED MISUSE OF THE MATERIAL AND INFORMATION PROVIDED.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

When you live in the backwards, upside-down world of covert narcissistic abuse, your body often understands the danger long before your mind can name it. The symptoms you thought were “random,” “weird,” or “just stress” were actually your nervous system trying to protect you.

In this episode, we explore the physical signs you didn’t recognize as trauma responses — the jaw tension, the chest tightness, the digestive issues, the sleep disruptions, the ringing in your ears, and even that twitchy eyelid that sent you down a Google rabbit hole at 2 a.m.

You’ll hear why these symptoms appear, how covert narcissistic environments activate chronic fight-or-flight, and why your medical tests may have come back “normal” even though your body felt anything but normal.

And most importantly — you’ll learn that these symptoms are not defects. They are intelligent survival signals.
They are the truth your body carried for you.

This episode will validate your experience, deepen your understanding of the trauma response, and help you see your body not as the problem — but as your greatest ally.

DISCLAIMER: THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY RENEE SWANSON, COVERT NARCISSISM PODCAST, AND CNG LIFE COACHING IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT TO BE USED FOR DIAGNOSIS PURPOSES AND NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR CLINICAL CARE. PLEASE CONSULT A HEALTH CARE PROVIDER FOR GUIDANCE SPECIFIC TO YOUR CASE.

THIS MATERIAL DISCUSSES NARCISSISM IN GENERAL. RENEE SHARES STORIES FROM HER PERSONAL EXPERIENCES AS WELL AS FROM THOSE SHE HAS TALKED WITH FOR SEVERAL YEARS. HER MATERIAL DOES NOT CLAIM THAT ANY SPECIFIC PERSON HAS NARCISSISM AND SHOULD NOT BE USED TO REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON AS HAVING NARCISSISM. PERMISSION IS NOT GRANTED TO LINK TO OR REPOST THIS MATERIAL TO SUPPORT AN ALLEGATION OR SUPPORT A CLAIM THAT ANY SPECIFIC PERSON IS A NARCISSIST. THAT WOULD BE AN UNAUTHORIZED MISUSE OF THE MATERIAL AND INFORMATION PROVIDED.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Talking to your adult children about a covert narcissistic parent is one of the hardest and most emotionally loaded challenges survivors face. You’re carrying years of truth inside you — experiences that shaped your life, your self-concept, your safety, and in many cases, the childhood environment your kids grew up in. And yet, speaking that truth openly can feel dangerous. It can feel like badmouthing. It can feel like you’re putting your children in the middle. It can feel like you’re betraying them or burdening them.

But silence isn’t healing either.
And your children will eventually have questions — real, hard, vulnerable questions.

In this episode, we break down exactly how to navigate those conversations with honesty, clarity, and emotional integrity. You’ll learn how to talk about your lived experience without attacking their other parent, how to answer direct questions using grounded truth rather than character statements, and how to model the healthy communication and relational skills your children never got to see growing up.

We explore:

• Why defending yourself often backfires — and what to do instead

• How to focus on values rather than the other parent’s behavior

• How to give your children the freedom to think for themselves

• How to model emotional safety, regulation, accountability, and repair

• What to say when they ask, “Why did you leave?” or “Did you fight a lot?”

• How your healing teaches them more than your explanations ever will

This episode is filled with real stories, practical examples, and compassionate guidance for every parent walking the tightrope between truth and protection. If you feel misunderstood by your adult children, if you’ve been unfairly judged, or if you're afraid to say the wrong thing — this conversation will help you find your footing again.

Because you can talk to your children about what happened.
You can honor your truth without dishonoring theirs.
And you can be the safe, grounded parent they return to as they begin making sense of their own story.

THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY RENEE SWANSON, COVERT NARCISSISM PODCAST, AND CNG LIFE COACHING IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT TO BE USED FOR DIAGNOSIS PURPOSES AND NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR CLINICAL CARE. PLEASE CONSULT A HEALTH CARE PROVIDER FOR GUIDANCE SPECIFIC TO YOUR CASE.

THIS MATERIAL DISCUSSES NARCISSISM IN GENERAL. RENEE SHARES STORIES FROM HER PERSONAL EXPERIENCES AS WELL AS FROM THOSE SHE HAS TALKED WITH FOR SEVERAL YEARS. HER MATERIAL DOES NOT CLAIM THAT ANY SPECIFIC PERSON HAS NARCISSISM AND SHOULD NOT BE USED TO REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON AS HAVING NARCISSISM. PERMISSION IS NOT GRANTED TO LINK TO OR REPOST THIS MATERIAL TO SUPPORT AN ALLEGATION OR SUPPORT A CLAIM THAT ANY SPECIFIC PERSON IS A NARCISSIST. THAT WOULD BE AN UNAUTHORIZED MISUSE OF THE MATERIAL AND INFORMATION PROVIDED.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

So many survivors walk into healing believing they were “codependent,” when the truth is far more compassionate and far more accurate:
What you were doing wasn’t codependency — it was fawning, a trauma response your nervous system used to keep you safe in an emotionally dangerous environment.

In this episode, we break down the difference between fawning and codependency in a way that finally makes sense for survivors of covert narcissistic abuse. We explore why these two patterns get confused, how fawning operates as a survival mechanism, and why labeling yourself “codependent” often adds unnecessary shame to an already painful experience.

You’ll hear real, relatable examples that show what these behaviors look like in everyday life: saying “it’s okay” when it isn’t, prioritizing someone else’s needs over your own, and walking on eggshells. We’ll explore each scenario from both angles — the trauma-driven fawn response and the learned relational pattern of codependency — so you can see exactly where the difference lies.

If you’ve ever blamed yourself for being “too accommodating,” “too forgiving,” or “too passive,” this episode will help you shift that lens. You were not weak. You were surviving.
And now, you get to learn a new way of being where safety no longer depends on self-abandonment.

DISCLAIMER: THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY RENEE SWANSON, COVERT NARCISSISM PODCAST, AND CNG LIFE COACHING IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT TO BE USED FOR DIAGNOSIS PURPOSES AND NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR CLINICAL CARE. PLEASE CONSULT A HEALTH CARE PROVIDER FOR GUIDANCE SPECIFIC TO YOUR CASE.

THIS MATERIAL DISCUSSES NARCISSISM IN GENERAL. RENEE SHARES STORIES FROM HER PERSONAL EXPERIENCES AS WELL AS FROM THOSE SHE HAS TALKED WITH FOR SEVERAL YEARS. HER MATERIAL DOES NOT CLAIM THAT ANY SPECIFIC PERSON HAS NARCISSISM AND SHOULD NOT BE USED TO REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON AS HAVING NARCISSISM. PERMISSION IS NOT GRANTED TO LINK TO OR REPOST THIS MATERIAL TO SUPPORT AN ALLEGATION OR SUPPORT A CLAIM THAT ANY SPECIFIC PERSON IS A NARCISSIST. THAT WOULD BE AN UNAUTHORIZED MISUSE OF THE MATERIAL AND INFORMATION PROVIDED.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

This Thanksgiving episode is unlike any you’ve heard before.
Instead of forcing gratitude outward—toward family, toward traditions, toward circumstances that may feel complicated or painful—this episode brings gratitude back home. To you.

Survivors of covert narcissistic abuse often carry shame for the very responses that kept them alive. They question their anger, their confusion, their anxiety, their numbness—never realizing these were intelligent, protective signals from a system trying desperately to keep them safe.

Today, we slow down and offer tender gratitude to the parts of you that worked tirelessly on your behalf: your nervous system, your instincts, your emotions, your mind, your body, and the deep, quiet resilience that got you to this moment.

Through metaphors, reflection, and compassionate storytelling, we explore how emotional pain functions just like hunger pains: not as a flaw, but as communication. Your system wasn’t failing—it was calling out for you. And today, we thank it.

If you’ve ever struggled with self-judgment…
If you’ve ever wondered why you reacted the way you did…
If you want to feel more connected to yourself and soften the shame you’ve been carrying…

This episode will meet you with warmth, understanding, and a powerful reminder:

You were your own miracle. And you deserve gratitude, too.

DISCLAIMER: THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY RENEE SWANSON, COVERT NARCISSISM PODCAST, AND CNG LIFE COACHING IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT TO BE USED FOR DIAGNOSIS PURPOSES AND NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR CLINICAL CARE. PLEASE CONSULT A HEALTH CARE PROVIDER FOR GUIDANCE SPECIFIC TO YOUR CASE.

THIS MATERIAL DISCUSSES NARCISSISM IN GENERAL. RENEE SHARES STORIES FROM HER PERSONAL EXPERIENCES AS WELL AS FROM THOSE SHE HAS TALKED WITH FOR SEVERAL YEARS. HER MATERIAL DOES NOT CLAIM THAT ANY SPECIFIC PERSON HAS NARCISSISM AND SHOULD NOT BE USED TO REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON AS HAVING NARCISSISM. PERMISSION IS NOT GRANTED TO LINK TO OR REPOST THIS MATERIAL TO SUPPORT AN ALLEGATION OR SUPPORT A CLAIM THAT ANY SPECIFIC PERSON IS A NARCISSIST. THAT WOULD BE AN UNAUTHORIZED MISUSE OF THE MATERIAL AND INFORMATION PROVIDED.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

In Part 2 of this story, we pick up right where the alligator encounter left off — not with danger, but with the emotional aftershock that followed.

My body was still shaking, adrenaline pumping, breath unsteady. I paddled straight toward my friend in a heightened state: frightened, confused, and trying to make sense of whether I had truly just kayaked over a mama alligator… or whether I had imagined the whole thing.

And what happened next revealed something even more important than the alligator:
the difference between safe people and unsafe people.

A safe person — like my friend — meets your overwhelm with curiosity.
“What did you see?”
“How big was it?”
“Are you okay?”

Her calm voice, her steady presence, and her willingness to believe me allowed my nervous system to settle. That is co-regulation in action. That is emotional safety. That is what a healthy connection feels like.

But if I had been with my ex-husband that day, the story would’ve played out very differently.
My fear would’ve annoyed him.
My excitement would’ve irritated him.
My reality would’ve been talked over, corrected, or erased.

I would’ve been told it was just a log.
I would’ve doubted myself.
I would’ve minimized my experience.
And eventually, I would’ve convinced myself it never really happened.

That’s what unsafe people do: they erase your reality until you no longer trust yourself at all.

Today’s episode shines a light on the power of validation, the necessity of safe connection, the neuroscience behind co-regulation, and why survivors of covert narcissistic abuse learn to silence their own experiences. Because when someone finally believes you — truly believes you — it restores something deeper than the story.
It restores you.

THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY RENEE SWANSON, COVERT NARCISSISM PODCAST, AND CNG LIFE COACHING IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT TO BE USED FOR DIAGNOSIS PURPOSES AND NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR CLINICAL CARE. PLEASE CONSULT A HEALTH CARE PROVIDER FOR GUIDANCE SPECIFIC TO YOUR CASE.

THIS MATERIAL DISCUSSES NARCISSISM IN GENERAL. RENEE SHARES STORIES FROM HER PERSONAL EXPERIENCES AS WELL AS FROM THOSE SHE HAS TALKED WITH FOR SEVERAL YEARS. HER MATERIAL DOES NOT CLAIM THAT ANY SPECIFIC PERSON HAS NARCISSISM AND SHOULD NOT BE USED TO REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON AS HAVING NARCISSISM. PERMISSION IS NOT GRANTED TO LINK TO OR REPOST THIS MATERIAL TO SUPPORT AN ALLEGATION OR SUPPORT A CLAIM THAT ANY SPECIFIC PERSON IS A NARCISSIST. THAT WOULD BE AN UNAUTHORIZED MISUSE OF THE MATERIAL AND INFORMATION PROVIDED.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.