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In psychology, the term "identity" is most commonly used to describe the distinctive qualities or traits that make an individual unique. Identities are strongly associated with self-esteem, and individuality and - for a teenager - forming their identity is a crucial job.

It's been over two years since I created the first episode looking at the topic of identity formation. In this episode I have pulled material from the orginal discussion, and brought in Susie to revisit the topic so we can discuss what we have learned during our parenting journeys.

One of the key issues we discuss is the imortance of being flexible and not fixing a child's identity, so they have room to develop and grow. We can help this by supporting their teens' self-worth and personal growth; having open discussions about perceptions and roles.

BOOKS:

• Inventing Ourselves; The Secret Life of the Teenage Brain by Sarah Jayne Blakemore
• His Dark Materials - Phillip Pullman
• How to Raise a Healthy Gamer - Dr Alok Kanojia

RESOURCES:
Identity
https://www.choosingtherapy.com/identity-crisis/
https://www.harleytherapy.co.uk/counselling/who-am-i-identity-crisis.htm
https://aspiroadventure.com/blog/why-is-teen-identity-development-important/#:~:text=Identity%20formation%20in%20teens%20is,most%20of%20their%20adult%20life.
The 8 stages of development Eric Ericson: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aYCBdZLCDBQ&t=28s

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Please hit the follow button if you like the podcast, and share it with anyone who might benefit. You can review us on Apple podcasts by going to the show page, scrolling down to the bottom where you can click on a star then you can leave your message.

I don't have medical training so please seek the advice of a specialist if you're not coping.

My email is teenagersuntangled@gmail.com
My website has a blog, searchable episodes, and ways to contact us:
www.teenagersuntangled.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/teenagersuntangled/
Facebook: https://m.facebook.com/teenagersuntangled/

Susie is available for a free 15 minute consultation, and has a great blog:
www.amindful-life.co.uk

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I grew up believing in a meritocracy; with hard work - and government funding of my university education - I eventually escaped a difficult home and poor schooling to succeed in journalism.

But times have moved on, and the reality now is that getting a university education is no longer the gateway it used to be. In fact, according to generational expert and historian, Dr Eliza Filby, our life chances and opportunities are no longer shaped by what we learn or earn but by whether we have access to the Bank of Mum and Dad.

She says, we’re living in an Inheritocracy, where parental support is what matters most, and Western society is beginning to shift more towards an Asian model of family reciprocity.

This is definitely what I found when I researched my episode on whether teens should pay rent. There's been a quiet revolution of multiple generations now living under one roof because it makes more sense than casting our young into a world in which things have changed so dramatically.

RELEVANT EPISODE:

https://www.teenagersuntangled.com/parenting-styles-that-enable-teens-to-grow-into-capable-adults-1/

DR ELIZA FILBY:

• https://www.elizafilby.com/
• https://www.instagram.com/dr_eliza_filby/
• https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCS82Ka2wcPerdEGx6Z1d1eA
• https://www.amazon.co.uk/Inheritocracy-Should-Talk-about-Bank/dp/1785908588/ref=sr_1_1?dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.aFtkjtdKIWYZQUwxEK8p5vmrfiov9IVFwcGxhrbE3bA.EY2LeRMRlEqIxdqf1NZed1ZZIgBSqtu8XNlMv5uGPhQ&dib_tag=se&keywords=inheritocracy&qid=1715590848&sr=8-1

Support the show

Thank you so much for your support.

Please hit the follow button if you like the podcast, and share it with anyone who might benefit. You can review us on Apple podcasts by going to the show page, scrolling down to the bottom where you can click on a star then you can leave your message.

I don't have medical training so please seek the advice of a specialist if you're not coping.

My email is teenagersuntangled@gmail.com
My website has a blog, searchable episodes, and ways to contact us:
www.teenagersuntangled.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/teenagersuntangled/
Facebook: https://m.facebook.com/teenagersuntangled/

Susie is available for a free 15 minute consultation, and has a great blog:
www.amindful-life.co.uk

Send us a text

The mini-series, Adolescence, is a global hit, topping Netflix charts in 71 countries and amassing 24.3 million views in its first four days.

It's sparked a global conversation about parenting, masculinity, and the impact of social media on young people. It's brilliance rests on holding up a mirror to everyone in society, showing us the complex factors that cause toxic ideas to take root.

When I started this podcast I set out to create somewhere that is a safe space for us parents to explore the challenges we face, judgement free. The links below are all referenced in the episode offering tools to think about, and unpack, our own parenting and how best to connect with and support our own kids.

BLOG: What to think about before handing your child a phone: https://www.teenagersuntangled.com/blog/mobile-phones-social-media-and-online-access-what-i-would-do-if-i-had-my-teens-or-tweens-again/

BOOK: When you lose it by Roxy and Gaye Longworth

EPISODES:

• Screen time: https://www.teenagersuntangled.com/screen-time-for-tweens-and-teens-the-latest-on-what-works-and-what-doesnt/
• Andrew Tate and the manosphere: https://www.teenagersuntangled.com/role-models-andrew-tate-misogyny-red-pills-and-the-manosphere/
• Sexting and nudes: https://www.teenagersuntangled.com/parenting-tips-4-protecting-your-tweenteen-from-doing-something-illegal-with-their-phone-camera-aka-sexting-also-how-and-why-you-might-give-your-teen-an-allowance/
• Porn culture: episode https://www.teenagersuntangled.com/pornography-why-talking-to-your-teen-about-it-is-more-important-now-than-its-ever-been-and-great/
• Andrew Hampton interview: https://www.teenagersuntangled.com/114-friendships-frenemies-and-boy-banter-parenting-our-teens-through-the-relationship-pitfalls/
• Masculinity vaccinations: https://www.teenagersuntangled.com/98-boys-emotions-masculinity-vaccinations-and-online-influencers/
• Talking with boys: https://www.teenagersuntangled.com/masculinity-and-positive-ways-of-supporting-our-teenage-boys-an-interview-with-mike-nicholson-from/
• Bigorexia and bodybuilding: https://www.teenagersuntangled.com/feeding-your-teen-control-issues-and-bigorexia/
• Looksmaxxing: https://www.teenagersuntangled.com/112-boys-looks-and-masculinity-on-social-media-the-hard-and-soft-of-looksmaxxing/
• Staying connected: (second part of this episode) https://www.teenagersuntangled.com/2-alcohol-how-to-discuss-it-and-staying-connected-should-we-be-letting-our-teenagers-drink-and-w/
• Male friendships and the masculine mask: https://www.teenagersuntangled.com/boy-friendships-and-supporting-our-sons-in-forming-positive-friendships-also-what-the-we-sho-1/

For a t

Support the show

Thank you so much for your support.

Please hit the follow button if you like the podcast, and share it with anyone who might benefit. You can review us on Apple podcasts by going to the show page, scrolling down to the bottom where you can click on a star then you can leave your message.

I don't have medical training so please seek the advice of a specialist if you're not coping.

My email is teenagersuntangled@gmail.com
My website has a blog, searchable episodes, and ways to contact us:
www.teenagersuntangled.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/teenagersuntangled/
Facebook: https://m.facebook.com/teenagersuntangled/

Susie is available for a free 15 minute consultation, and has a great blog:
www.amindful-life.co.uk