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Fajr Reminders - Mahmood Habib Masjid and Islamic Center

Fajr Reminders - Mahmood Habib Masjid and Islamic Center

By: Fajr Reminders - Mahmood Habib Masjid and Islamic Center
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  • Parenting skills #1

    Parenting skills #1
    Dec 5 2025
    Auto-generated transcript:In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful. All praise is due to Allah, Lord of the worlds. And peace and blessings be upon the kind and the kind of messengers and messengers. Muhammad and the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him and his family. Peace and blessings be upon him and his family. After that, my brothers and sisters, we talked about the overall background, the reason why parenting, conscious and thoughtful parenting is absolutely critical. Parenting is not something that will happen by default. It's not something that will happen because you want it. It is something you have to work on. And it starts with having a dream for your child, which is a shared dream. So, it has to be a three-way conversation. The father, the mother and the child together. Have the conversation with regard to what you want this child to become and why. And the child must be... the prime mover behind that. The child should want it. And you as a parent must support that. And if you feel that the child wants something which is inappropriate or which you think is not the right thing, then it is your job, with love and with understanding to guide the child to where you think the child should be. And again, be very careful and clear in this. It is not always that you have the right answers. You may not have the right answers. But you can try to find ways to help them. And so, having that level of humility to know that the child also has an understanding… And at the end of the day, the child… If you really want the child to exceed… and excel… then that will happen only if the child… is herself or himself completely committed to that goal. And that commitment cannot be forced. So, that's a very important thing to understand. Commitment cannot be forced. Commitment has to come from inside. If you want the commitment to come, then you have to spend the time and the energy behind it. Now, let me talk about what I call the six rules of Islamic parenting, because we are talking about parenting from an Islamic context. And as I mentioned before, these are important because this is something that we will be questioned about by Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala when we meet Allah. As I said before, to be a parent, to have a child is not a blessing. Allah never used the word niyamah for children. Allah used the word fitrah, which means test. So a child is a test. And if you pass the test, then it becomes a niyamah. But by itself, it's not a niyamah. If the child, if you fail in that test, then may Allah have mercy on us, the children can become the opposite of niyamah. So they can be a sadaqah jariyat, they can be a niyamah for you, or they can be the opposite of that. And that is, that depends on what we choose to do. Illa mashallah. So these are the six, what I call my rules. The first and foremost is to introduce Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala to the child. The child must know who Allah is. And the child must have a relationship with Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala. It's not just a matter of intellectually knowing somewhere, this is Allah, this is a description, no. So what? Why is that important? How does that relate to me as a human being, as a Muslim? So knowing Allah, introducing Allah is these two things. One is, who is Allah, His glory, His majesty, His power, His authority, His generosity, what He has blessed us with and so on, and answering it when we go back to Him, inshaAllah. And what is my relationship with that? Because, only when I understand my relationship with Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala, then it comes to the actual action which is, therefore, what should I do? Therefore, what do I need to do? Right? It's not a, as I said before, it's not an intellectual exercise. This is a very personal relationship, which is closer and more personal than any other relationship, or the face of the earth, including our relationship with our own parents. Because all relationships of this world end with our death. The only relationship which remains is our relationship with our Creator, with our Khalif-e-Malik, with Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala. This remains with us even after we die. Second one is to introduce Rasulullah, sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, to your child. And then you can come back to this discussion of this discussion of this discussion of this discussion of this discussion of this discussion of this discussion of this discussion of this discussion of this discussion of this discussion of this discussion of this discussion of this discussion of this discussion of this discussion of this discussion of this discussion of this discussion of this discussion of this discussion of this discussion of this discussion of this discussion of this discussion of this discussion of this discussion of this discussion of this discussion of this discussion of this discussion of this discussion of this discussion of this discussion of this discussion of this discussion of this discussion of ...
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  • Kuwait Parenting Workshop #2

    Kuwait Parenting Workshop #2
    Dec 4 2025
    Auto-generated transcript:I want to remind myself and you that as far as children are concerned, the only thing that parents will be questioned about before Allah is how those children were raised, about their tarbiyah. Right? You will not be asked whether your child was a doctor or an engineer or a pilot or an architect and so on. None of which are bad things to have. All good things, I am telling you. But you will not be questioned about that. You will be questioned only about the tarbiyah of the child. What is it that the child did with respect to his beliefs? And with respect to his akhlaq, his dealings? So when you are talking about what is my dream for my child, okay, that's your dream for the child. But you are not the child. At the end of the day, he is the one who is going to or she is the one who is going to have to do what you have dreamt. So where is their commitment in that? So that is very important for you to understand. Okay? So the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the goal and the commitment for the dream comes from within the child, it's not going to happen. It will not happen. So, you have to guide the child to have a kind of dream which also aligns with your own dream. If you don't do that, and it is only your dream, it won't work. And then obviously when I say you, I mean both the mother and the father. So, it has to be a three-way conversation. Sit, three of you sit together and talk about this dream. What is it that motivates you? How will you do this? And so on. So, the dream, your dream for the child really should be the child's dream for herself or himself supported by you. It's not a question, I want my child to be this or that. You may want. You may want. Won't happen. Unless you put the effort. And unless the child also wants that to happen. So, have those conversations. I don't know if you have them yet, but you should have them. Now, parenting as I say is a contact sport. It's not a armchair dialogue. You can't sit and, you know, I want this, I want that. No, it has to be your involvement. And your involvement includes your time. It includes your talent. It includes money. But much more important than money is your time. So, how much time? How much time do you give to your child? And the usual answer we get from people is, Oh, but you see, I'm very busy. I have this job. I have to travel. You're making the choices. It is your child. You have to make the choices. And if you say, I have to do all of this. That's the choice you're making. Then don't expect magic to happen because magic won't happen. Right? Right? Andre Agassi, tennis player, who had the most powerful serve of any tennis player in history. He started, literally, his father started him playing tennis, literally, when he was the highest. He was the height of an adult tennis racket. So, how old is that? Maybe two years old. He just taught us the racket. And his father designed a ball throwing machine. In those days, they didn't have these machines. Nowadays, you can buy them. But in those days, he designed a ball throwing machine which used to throw the ball at a speed of, if I'm not mistaken, about a hundred kilometers an hour. So, like a bullet. And Andre Agassi's father had this rule that he had to, again, if I'm not mistaken with the figures, he had to face one thousand serves. This ball is being fired. He has to face that serve and hit it back one thousand times a day. So, by the time Andre Agassi was like ten or twelve years old, he had already faced a million serves, which no competition, no competitor of his ever did. So, the key is the dream of the father, starting early enough, and then consistent effort on that. Not a day was missed. There was no way, as long as I was not sick in bed, I was not sick. Whether it's Christmas, whether it is this, whether it is that, it doesn't matter. You are going to fire one thousand serves in a day. And there are many such stories about, I'm giving you examples from athletics and sports because they're easy to find. Many such examples. Great sports people don't become great sports people by wishing for it. There is a lot of energy, there is a lot of effort that goes into it. And the same rule applies. So, your commitment as a parent, how committed are ...
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  • Kuwait Parenting Workshop #1

    Kuwait Parenting Workshop #1
    Dec 3 2025
    Auto-generated transcript:I want to remind myself and you that as far as children are concerned, the only thing that parents will be questioned about before Allah is how those children were raised, about their tarbiyah. Right? You will not be asked whether your child was a doctor or an engineer or a pilot or an architect and so on. None of which are bad things to have. All good things, I am telling you. But you will not be questioned about that. You will be questioned only about the tarbiyah of the child. What is it that the child did with respect to his beliefs? And with respect to his akhlaq, his dealings? And that is why it is so important to pay attention to that. See, I want to draw your attention to is this, that people in our normal sort of, you know, we will talk, say, well, so and so has been blessed with a child. Right? Or so and so has not been blessed with a child. Some people have children, some don't have children. Although Allah swt in the ayat of Mishra Allah swt made it very clear. Allah swt said, Allah is the one who has control over everything. . Allah said, He gives to whoever He wants to give. He gives to whoever He wants daughters. And He gives to whoever He wants sons. And Allah said, to some He gives both. And to some He gives nothing. So it is the, something which is given by Allah swt. Children. So I know many people, some friends, some others who talk about, who are so desperate to have children. And if they don't get children, they feel very bad about it. Society also puts pressure on them. How is it you don't have children? How long have you been married? Did you seek particular attention? Did you do this, do that? People ask all these funny questions. So there is a lot of sort of psychological pressure, social pressure. And then of course desire also. Alhamdulillah. No one can say, No one can say. No one can say. No one can say. No one can say. No one can say. No one can say. No one can say. Alhamdulillah, the world today has, how many, 7 billion? 7 billion didn't happen by accident. Because people have a desire to have children, so they have children. So, Alhamdulillah, this is all the Qadar of Allah. Allah made the earth, He created human beings, and then He put this desire to propagate the species in the hearts of people, so they are doing it. So, we talk about this, people who don't have children, they feel as if they are somehow, I won't say cursed, but not blessed. But the thing I say to them, I say to the others also, which is, look in the Quran and show me where Allah called children a blessing. Find me the place. Niyama. Allah, Subhanahu wa ta'ala, called children fitna. Trust. Inna wa alhamalukum wa auladukum. Niyama or fitna? Fitna. In Surah Al-Taghabi, Allah said this, In Surah Al-Taghabi, Allah also said, Inna wa alhamalukum wa auladukum, aduwan lakum. They are your enemies. Azwajikum wa auladukum. Your spouses and your children are your enemies. Except those who you have. So, forgive them and treat them and guide them correctly and so on. So, I'm not saying you should not have children. I'm saying, hamza merla givu. But don't just imagine that because you have a child, you are somehow blessed in this special manner. You're not. You have now entered the testing ground. If Allah gives you a child, Allah is giving you a child. He does not give you a test. If Allah does not give you a child, seriously, when people come to me and ask me, I say, thank Allah. Say, Alhamdulillah. Should I do this operation, that operation? No, I'm not. You're asking my opinion, I say no. Don't do any operation. Ask Allah. Allah will give you. So, I want. Why do you want? What? Huh? Huh? You're not sitting in this house in a bad manner. Don't feel at peace at all. Don't feel at peace at all. Don't feel at peace at all. Don't feel at peace at all. Don't feel at peace at all. Don't feel at peace at all. Don't feel at peace at all. Don't feel at peace at all. Don't feel at peace at all. Don't feel at peace at all. Don't feel at peace at all. Don't feel at peace at all. Don't feel at peace at all. Don't feel at peace at all. There is no one to sit and eat. And it will be left. So the point is that, first and foremost, think about this. Those of you who are, who don't have children, or who are not yet married, and once you get married, you will want to have children. Don't make that into a default setting. Right? So spend some thought on this. Say, do I really want children? Alhamdulillah, by all means have children. But do that thoughtfully. I'm not discouraging you. I'm saying, do it thoughtfully. Spend some. It deserves that thought. And if you don't have children, if you don't have children, don't need to feel bad about it. Don't need to feel somehow defensive. Alhamdulillah. Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala has Qadar. Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala has Qadar. He gave us, if you look in Islam, there are many examples of some of the biggest names in our scholars, in our Sarbh Sali, who never had ...
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