Episodes

  • Are You a People Pleaser? Stop Walking on Eggshells NOW!

    Are You a People Pleaser? Stop Walking on Eggshells NOW!
    Sep 27 2024
    Top 3% in podcasts globally This week we talk about How to Help Heal Anxiety and Fear After Narcissistic Abuse Want to heal from within?!? Get more info on how, here: https://linktr.ee/FierceChristyJade FREEBIE TIME! My FREE 4 MINUTE empowering meditation: https://christyjade.ck.page/insider Join my free facebook group here: https://facebook.com/groups/christyjade And if you just wanna peek around and find out more about me and my work..check out my website! It's FUN AND SPARKLY ;) https://christyjade.com/ Want to drop me a line or have a question? Email me anytime! fiercemamac@gmail.com Let's connect on social media! https://www.instagram.com/fiercechristyjade/ https://www.tiktok.com/@fiercemamachristy After abuse we need SIMPLE. I created a planner for busy women just like you to navigate your days easier: https://christyjade.podia.com/shethrivesplanner I am Christy Jade, adoring wife, adoptive mama and narcissistic abuse survivor. I now help other women who have gone through abuse (or are going through it) find confidence, power and peace. DOMESTIC ABUSE HOTLINE : 800-799-7233 Speaker 1: (00:00) Hello. Hello. Today's episode's gonna be a little more casual, a little unplanned, a little cross your fingers. Let's hope something good comes out of this. Just kidding. Stay tuned. We're gonna dive into walking on eggshells. Speaker 1: (00:16) Hey Queens, welcome to, but Still she thrives. Do you wanna stop getting caught up in that wicked web of a creepy crawling narcissist and you find yourself up late at night replaying the abuse you put up with and wondering how you can heal Now? Do you wake up hoping for healthy relationships and peace only to feel totally exhausted and mind effed? Girl, I see you. I'm Christy. I too had to disconnect from toxic people in my life and I wished I could undo the damage. I felt ashamed, lonely, and kind of lost. But I'm a stubborn Italian and I refused to give up. I found ways to recalibrate my mind and body more quickly than I thought and can now share them with you. In this podcast, you will find coping tools, healing methods, and confidence boosters so you can trust yourself and find peace and freedom. So, shields up ladies, let's go protect our peace. Speaker 1: (01:14) So this is something I definitely went through with the narcissist in my life and every client I've had, every person I've had reach out. This tends to be something we all have in common, that with the narcissist, you are basically trained to have to walk on eggshells. Why? I don't know. Because the, the more you may go against them or not agree with them or just do what you want to do, the worse the consequences are, whether that's emotional, physical, whatever type of abuse. And this honestly could go for any type of a abuse, not just narcissistic abuse, but especially with narcissists. Man, it is their way or the highway. And we learn that we have to sacrifice our own wants, our own needs in order to placate them. I grew up pretty scared of somebody in my life. I grew up, I'll be honest, terrified because I was scared if I said the wrong thing made the wrong move, that person would explode. Speaker 1: (02:25) And it was a very scary experience. Every day I had to walk around on eggshells, right? That's a saying, walking on eggshells. And this was all, I honestly knew. I didn't realize the severity of how it would impact my entire life moving forward, even after I wasn't in this narcissist life anymore. So today we're gonna talk about how to change your mindset because it's not just kind of like, oh, here's a tip to not have to walk on eggshells, right? Like it's a whole mindset shift. So I thought, let's dig into it. I don't, like I said, I don't really have bullet points here, but I'm just gonna talk about my experience, what helped me and it, I'm so passionate about this. I may do another episode on it, but I just wanted to just have, have like a heart to heart with you guys about this because this is, something comes up, like I said, my clients are like, oh, I have to walk on eggshells. Speaker 1: (03:21) And then it bleeds into our lives. So when we are even out of the relationship, whether it's someone in your childhood, whether it's a romantic situation, you have really been conditioned to sacrifice your wants and needs. And we have these fears built in now of upsetting the narcissist. Yes. But it bleeds into our life of we now are often afraid of conflict. In my experience, I will say this, I'm a bold, fierce lady, okay? I've always had a stronger personality. So for me, this showed up just with a certain type of personality. I had no trouble with certain people saying, Hey, this is how I feel. But it was only people I felt safe with. The thing is, when you have grown up and are around narcissists, there can be a likelihood that you will attract and be comfortable with selfish people or people who are their way or the highway, because you are used to that personality, right? ...
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    21 mins
  • Am I the Toxic One? The Surprising Answer

    Am I the Toxic One? The Surprising Answer
    Sep 19 2024
    Top 3% in podcasts globally My FREE 4 MINUTE empowering meditation: https://christyjade.ck.page/insider Join my free facebook group here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/christyjade Have trouble setting boundaries in your life? Grab my E-Course here: https://christyjade.podia.com/boundariescourse All my current offers! Journey to Peace 1:1 Coaching Call and Blueprint https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/journey-to-peace-coaching-blueprint/ Boundaries Course: https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/empowered-boundaries/ #notmyshit Journal https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B09P2HMWFF?ie=UTF8&psc=1&linkCode=sl1&tag=christym33-20&linkId=266a98aec073c6e361ea5a2b4e69d95d&language=en_US&ref_=as_li_ss_tl FREE FUN: 4 Minute Empowerment Meditation: 30 Day Toxic Relationships Declutter: https://christyjade.ck.page/toxicdeclutter Abuse Recovery Affirmations: https://christyjade.ck.page/affirmations And if you just wanna peek around and find out more about me and my work..check out my website! It's FUN AND SPARKLY ;) https://www.christyjade.com/ Want to drop me a line or have a question? Email me anytime! fiercemamac@gmail.com Let's connect on social media! https://www.instagram.com/fiercechristyjade/ https://www.tiktok.com/@fiercemamachristy I am Christy Jade, adoring wife, adoptive mama and narcissistic abuse survivor. I now help other women who have gone through abuse (or are going through it) find confidence, power and peace. DOMESTIC ABUSE HOTLINE : 800-799-7233 TRANSCRIPT FINAL But Still She Thrives Ep 34 Am I the Toxic One - The Answer You May Not Expect Speaker 1 00:00 Today is a juicy topic. Am I the toxic one? I have been asked that. I see it all over narcissistic Facebook pages. People wanna know, am I the toxic one? And I've got some answers for you. Speaker 1 00:16 Hey Queens, welcome to, but still she thrives. Do you wanna stop getting caught up in that wicked web of a creepy crawling narcissist? Do you find yourself up late at night replaying the abuse you put up with and wondering how you can heal now? Do you wake up hoping for healthy relationships and peace only to feel totally exhausted? And mindf? Girl, I see you. I'm Christy. I too had to disconnect from toxic people in my life and I wished I could undo the damage. I felt ashamed, lonely, and kind of lost. But I'm a stubborn Italian and I refused to give up. I found ways to recalibrate my mind and body more quickly than I thought and can now share them with you. In this podcast, you will find coping tools, healing methods, and confidence boosters so you can trust yourself and find peace and freedom. So shields up ladies, let's go protect our peace. Speaker 1 01:14 I am so excited to do this episode because A, we often will be made out to be the crazy one, the toxic one, right? The narcissist in our life will put blame on us. We know that. But once we get out and we're on the other side, especially, we may say, Hey, maybe I wasn't all these things. So I'm gonna dig in. There's two answers to this. There's a no, none of this is your fault and you are not the narcissist. Like if you are even asking, am I the narcissist, you're probably not because narcissists are not self-aware. They don't even think they could be a narcissist. So the odds of that are very low. Do you have any toxic traits by nature or that have been formed because of your relationship? Maybe. So let's dig in. So like I said, the fact you're here, you're trying to learn, you're trying to grow, is a very not narcissistic trait, right? Speaker 1 02:11 It's also a not so toxic person trait. Does that mean you are free of any toxic tendencies that may be due to toxic relationships in your childhood, in your romantic hood, in your friendships, whatever it is that you learned or used as a response to someone else's toxic trait? Maybe. So we're gonna ask some questions. You can ask these questions to yourself and be honest, truly dig in. If you wanna figure out am I the toxic one? Do I have any toxic traits, right? The first one, are you only concerned with yourself? So this is a big narcissistic trait and it can be a toxic person trait. In general. Are you concerned with yourself? Are you self-absorbed? Everything's all about you. Everything always comes back to talking about you or your feelings, whatever, whatever odds are. If you are with a narcissist, you are probably sort of the opposite, A people pleaser. Speaker 1 03:07 But once you are out of this situation or nearing getting out, you may start to build up that confidence and start to say, Hey, what about me? And that's great. I love that you're a queen. Do more of that. And at some point though, the the pendulum may swing the other way where you get like, wow, this is my time and it is your time. You get that self-care, but don't lose your, the sweet part of you, right? Like don't lose that caring for other people. Don't throw other people under the bus. All of that. You...
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    19 mins
  • How to Help Heal Anxiety and Fear After Narcissistic Abuse

    How to Help Heal Anxiety and Fear After Narcissistic Abuse
    Sep 12 2024
    Top 3% in podcasts globally This week we talk about How to Help Heal Anxiety and Fear After Narcissistic Abuse Let me help you with 1:1 coaching special pricing for the month of May with VIP PRICING! One spot left! https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/journey-to-peace-coaching-blueprint/ FREEBIE TIME! My FREE 4 MINUTE empowering meditation: https://christyjade.ck.page/insider Join my free facebook group here: https://facebook.com/groups/christyjade And if you just wanna peek around and find out more about me and my work..check out my website! It's FUN AND SPARKLY ;) https://christyjade.com/ Want to drop me a line or have a question? Email me anytime! fiercemamac@gmail.com Let's connect on social media! https://www.instagram.com/fiercechristyjade/ https://www.tiktok.com/@fiercemamachristy I am Christy Jade, adoring wife, adoptive mama and narcissistic abuse survivor. I now help other women who have gone through abuse (or are going through it) find confidence, power and peace. DOMESTIC ABUSE HOTLINE : 800-799-7233 TRANSCRIPT Speaker 1: (00:00) Hello, my beautiful queen Bees. Today we're talking more about the effects of narcissistic abuse. If you are jumping in new here, welcome. We are doing this whole series on the effects of narcissistic abuse, psychologically, mentally, emotionally, all of fun. So stick around for how to help heal anxiety and fear after narcissistic abuse. Speaker 1: (00:26) Hey, Queens, welcome to, but still she thrives. Do you wanna stop getting caught up in that wicked web of a creepy crawling narcissist? Do you find yourself up late at night replaying the abuse you put up with? I'm wondering how you can heal now. Do you wake up hoping for healthy relationships and peace only to feel totally exhausted and mind effed? Girl, I see you. I'm Christy. I too had to disconnect from toxic people in my life, and I wished I could undo the damage. I felt ashamed, lonely, and kind of lost. But I'm a stubborn Italian and I refuse to give up. I found ways to recalibrate my mind and body more quickly than I thought and can now share them with you. In this podcast, you will find coping tools, healing methods, and confidence boosters so you can trust yourself and find peace and freedom. So, shields up ladies, let's go protect our peace. Speaker 1: (01:23) All right, so we know surviving, narcissistic abuse can take a lot of courage and resilience, but the journey toward healing does not end once the relationship is over. Once you've disconnected, often survivors are left grappling with anxiety and fear that linger long after the abuse has ended. So these emotional wounds can be very overwhelming, but it's essential to remember that healing is possible, right? Having that faith has been a big part of my journey. So today we're gonna explore strategies to help you navigate and overcome some of those anxieties and fears. Empowering you to reclaim that inner strength. Cuz girl, I see it. I know it's there. Let's do this. First of all, you have to validate your feelings, right? It's the first step really, in any form of abuse, acknowledging it and saying, yes, yes, this was abuse, this was bad. It's okay that I have these effects, these psychological effects, whatever sort of effects, it's okay and it's normal in this situation that I'm in, right? Is this situation a common thing? No. We are warriors who have survived some of the craziest type of abuse out there. So it's okay to validate your feelings. These people made us feel completely crazy, like things were our fault. Like we were crazy, like we were perceiving things incorrectly, that we were just paranoid, that we were sensitive, you know, all the things they called us. Okay? So you're out of it. I want you to breathe. Put your hand to your heart and say, my feelings are valid. I'm serious. I'm gonna give you a moment. Speaker 1: (03:06) Really s just suck it all in. Like it's okay. It's okay that there may be some resistance there too. This is why I'm big on affirmations, repeating these things daily in the morning before you go to bed. My feelings are valid, is a really important affirmation for people who have gone through such abuse. Another standard, I did it myself, is seeking professional help. This stuff is hard to go through alone. I highly suggest reaching out to myself of course, because this is what I do. Very specific to this type of abuse. I have a lot of knowledge, a lot of experience, and it's fun to work with me. So yay. Or a therapist, I always will say a therapist who has experience in their own lives with narcissism is going to be very beneficial. Okay? So someone who specializes in trauma and abuse, great, but narcissistic abuse, it is different. Speaker 1: (04:05) And I do think it's important to try to seek out a professional who has the experience with narcissism. So whether it's me or a therapist, somebody there to help you understand narcissism further. Not only that, but helping, keeping you accountable ...
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    19 mins
  • How to Rebuild Self Esteem After Narcissistic Abuse

    How to Rebuild Self Esteem After Narcissistic Abuse
    Sep 4 2024

    Top 3% in podcasts globally

    This week we talk about the ways to rebuild self esteem after narcissistic abuse.

    Let me help you with 1:1 coaching special pricing for the month of May!

    One spot left!

    https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/journey-to-peace-coaching-blueprint/

    GET ON MY WAITLIST FOR MY UPCOMING COURSE!!!

    https://queensofpeacewaitlist.lpages.co/early-bird-waitlist/

    FREEBIE TIME! My FREE 4 MINUTE empowering meditation:

    https://christyjade.ck.page/insider

    Join my free facebook group here:

    https://facebook.com/groups/christyjade

    Have trouble setting boundaries in your life?

    And if you just wanna peek around and find out more about me and my work..check out my website! It's FUN AND SPARKLY ;)

    https://christyjade.com/

    Want to drop me a line or have a question? Email me anytime!

    fiercemamac@gmail.com

    Let's connect on social media!

    https://www.instagram.com/fiercechristyjade/

    https://www.tiktok.com/@fiercemamachristy

    After abuse we need SIMPLE. I created a planner for busy women just like you to navigate your days easier: https://christyjade.podia.com/shethrivesplanner

    I am Christy Jade, adoring wife, adoptive mama and narcissistic abuse survivor. I now help other women who have gone through abuse (or are going through it) find confidence, power and peace.

    DOMESTIC ABUSE HOTLINE : 800-799-7233
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    15 mins
  • Did This Toxic Relationship Damage You Forever? The Psychological Effects of Narcissistic Abuse and How to Heal

    Did This Toxic Relationship Damage You Forever? The Psychological Effects of Narcissistic Abuse and How to Heal
    Aug 28 2024
    Top 3% in podcasts globally This weeks starts the series on the Psychological Effects of Narcissistic abuse and how you can start your healing journey in relation to each one! Let me help you with 1:1 coaching special pricing for the month of May! One spot left! https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/journey-to-peace-coaching-blueprint/ FREEBIE TIME! My FREE 4 MINUTE empowering meditation: https://christyjade.ck.page/insider Join my free facebook group here: https://facebook.com/groups/christyjade Have trouble setting boundaries in your life? And if you just wanna peek around and find out more about me and my work..check out my website! It's FUN AND SPARKLY ;) https://christyjade.com/ Want to drop me a line or have a question? Email me anytime! fiercemamac@gmail.com Let's connect on social media! https://www.instagram.com/fiercechristyjade/ https://www.tiktok.com/@fiercemamachristy I am Christy Jade, adoring wife, adoptive mama and narcissistic abuse survivor. I now help other women who have gone through abuse (or are going through it) find confidence, power and peace. DOMESTIC ABUSE HOTLINE : 800-799-7233 TRANSCRIPT Speaker 1: (00:00) I am so excited to start this series. This is all about the long-term psychological effects of narcissistic abuse. This is something I go really deep into with my clients and we work on it one-on-one and their customized plan. But I'm starting this series to help more people know about what those effects are, and we'll go as we go on in the series, we will touch on each one more deeply and about how specifically we can help heal each wound. Stay tuned. Speaker 1: (00:32) Hey Queens, welcome to, but still she thrives. Do you wanna stop getting caught up in that wicked web of a creepy crawling narcissist and you find yourself up late at night replaying the abuse you put up with and wondering how you can heal now? Do you wake up hoping for healthy relationships and peace only to feel totally exhausted? And mind F girl, I see you. I'm Christy. I too had to disconnect from toxic people in my life and I wished I could undo the damage I felt ashamed, lonely, and kind of lost. But I'm a stubborn Italian and I refuse to give up. I found ways to recalibrate my mind and body more quickly than I thought and can now share them with you. In this podcast, you'll find coping tools, healing methods, and confidence boosters so you can trust yourself and find peace and freedom. So shields up ladies. Let's go protect our peace. Speaker 1: (01:30) The long-term psychological effects of narcissistic abuse can be significant and have a lasting impact on the victims. So we're gonna talk today about some common effects that survivors may experience. Let us dive on in. So first, a big one, low self-esteem. Pretty much every client I work with, every victim I've spoken to and myself has had narcissistic abuse that results in lower self-esteem. It often involves consistent criticism, belittling and demeaning behavior, right? So obviously over time, especially if you've been in a really long-term relationship, whether it's during your childhood or a romantic relationship or even a friendship, this can erode a person's self-esteem leading to feelings of worthlessness and self-doubt. I know for myself, between my childhood and my adult sh in between there, starting at a young age because I was put down and told that I was stupid or I wasn't interesting or whatever it was that my narcissist used to say to me to make it as if I was not as smart as them. Speaker 1: (02:46) I was not as good as them would know the right buttons to push that over time. And honestly, pretty quickly in my childhood, I became a person who believed that they were not, not capable enough, especially in the academic area, which I was smart. I am smart, right? We all have our strengths in any academic area. One may be more than the other, like English and creative versus scientific and math, whatever. But I was convinced I wasn't really good at anything. Even though I was in honors classes, I felt like it was almost imposter syndrome. Like maybe I'm just somehow getting by somehow. That's not really true. I was really brainwashed that I was stupid. I'm sure a lot of you can relate to that. A lot of us are made to feel like we are not as valuable as the narcissist. We are not smart, we are not capable. Speaker 1: (03:40) They want us to be dependent on them and to need them. So they will reiterate and repeat how not intelligent we are in some form. And this completely will trash our self-esteem as time goes on. So if you have low self-esteem, if you have low self-worth, you are not alone. And it makes absolute sense that you don't if you have been a victim of narcissistic abuse. Another super annoying side effect of narcissistic abuse is anxiety and fear. So victims of narcissistic abuse may develop chronic anxiety and fear due to the unpredictable nature of the relationship. So if you grew up or in a a romantic ...
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    17 mins
  • The One Narcissistic Abuse Wound That You Need to Heal NOW

    The One Narcissistic Abuse Wound That You Need to Heal NOW
    Aug 14 2024
    Top 3% in podcasts globally We know that Narcissists can leave some damage, but let's talk about the one that needs to get attention right now! Listen in to todays' episode for more... My FREE 4 MINUTE empowering meditation: https://christyjade.ck.page/insider Join my free facebook group here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/christyjade All my current offers! Journey to Peace 1:1 Coaching Call and Blueprint https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/journey-to-peace-coaching-blueprint/ Boundaries Course: https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/empowered-boundaries/ #notmyshit Journal https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B09P2HMWFF?ie=UTF8&psc=1&linkCode=sl1&tag=christym33-20&linkId=266a98aec073c6e361ea5a2b4e69d95d&language=en_US&ref_=as_li_ss_tl FREE FUN: 4 Minute Empowerment Meditation: 30 Day Toxic Relationships Declutter: https://christyjade.ck.page/toxicdeclutter Abuse Recovery Affirmations: https://christyjade.ck.page/affirmations And if you just wanna peek around and find out more about me and my work..check out my website! It's FUN AND SPARKLY ;) https://www.christyjade.com/ Want to drop me a line or have a question? Email me anytime! fiercemamac@gmail.com Let's connect on social media! https://www.instagram.com/fiercechristyjade/ https://www.tiktok.com/@fiercemamachristy I am Christy Jade, adoring wife, adoptive mama and narcissistic abuse survivor. I now help other women who have gone through abuse (or are going through it) find confidence, power and peace. DOMESTIC ABUSE HOTLINE : 800-799-7233 Want to drop me a line or have a question? Email me anytime! fiercemamac@gmail.com Transcript: Speaker 1: (00:00) Good morning, good afternoon, or goodnight, wherever you are. Hello, I'm so glad you joined me. And today I have a special episode talking about a wound, a narcissistic wound, of course, that people don't really talk about. And maybe it's not so obvious, even though I would say a hundred percent of us have. So stay tuned. Speaker 1: (00:22) Hey, Queens, welcome to, but still she thrives. Do you wanna stop getting caught up in that wicked web of a creepy crawling narcissist? Do you find yourself up late at night replaying the abuse you put up with? I'm wondering how you can heal now. Do you wake up hoping for healthy relationships and peace only to feel totally exhausted? And mind F girl, I see you. I'm Christy. I too had to disconnect from toxic people in my life, and I wished I could undo the damage. I felt ashamed, lonely, and kind of lost. But I'm a stubborn Italian and I refused to give up. I found ways to recalibrate my mind and body more quickly than I thought and can now share them with you. In this podcast, you will find coping tools, healing methods, and confidence boosters so you can trust yourself and find peace and freedom. So shields up ladies, let's go protect our peace. Speaker 1: (01:20) We have talked about effects of narcissistic abuse. There are many, many, many of them. And in today's episode, we're gonna talk about the one that pretty much everybody has. I've had it, all my clients have it. It's something that's underlying and it's something that we have to maintain because of the level of narcissistic abuse and what it does to our mind, body, and dang soul, okay? It is chronic fatigue. When you have been exposed to narcissistic abuse, your nervous system, it gets stuck. You are stuck in that survival mode. You're always walking around on eggshells, right? You're hyper aware of everything going on around you, and you know you're listening, you're looking, your senses are always heightened in your environment to protect yourself and stay safe. I can remember back when I was going through narcissistic abuse, especially the physical abuse, just that fear of what's on the other side of the door. Speaker 1: (02:21) Do I need to protect myself? And it's just that fight flight fawn, whatever mode you go into, but you're always on. Every part of you is just always on. I mean, that sounds tiring enough. But what happens is when you are on that, you're running on adrenaline, you're running on cortisol, you're running on these stress hormones, right? So once you disconnect, once this person isn't in your daily life, once, you're not having to have that protection and that armor on so tight, there's no longer this constant dependency on stress, right? And those hormones that it actually will cause fatigue. I was kind of thinking about it in comparison. I mean, it's kind of off, but you'll get my comparison. I like analogy. So here we go. So I was comparing it to when I was like so focused, and you all can probably relate when you're so focused on studying for finals or some huge test. Speaker 1: (03:21) But let's do finals, because usually that's multiple classes. You know, it can be a couple of weeks of really preparing. Or if you're like me, a procrastinator, maybe a couple days and, but you're thrown into something, maybe pulling all nighters, putting your own...
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    12 mins
  • 5 Ways to STOP Obsessive Thoughts After Narcissistic Abuse

    5 Ways to STOP Obsessive Thoughts After Narcissistic Abuse
    Aug 7 2024
    Top 3% podcast Obsessive thoughts got ya down? Listen in on this week's episode for 5 ways to stop your ruminating thoughts after narcissistic abuse GET ON MY WAITLIST FOR MY UPCOMING COURSE!!! https://queensofpeacewaitlist.lpages.co/early-bird-waitlist/ My FREE 4 MINUTE empowering meditation: https://christyjade.ck.page/insider Join my free facebook group here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/christyjade Have trouble setting boundaries in your life? Grab my E-Course here: https://christyjade.podia.com/boundariescourse All my current offers! Journey to Peace 1:1 Coaching Call and Blueprint https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/journey-to-peace-coaching-blueprint/ Boundaries Course: https://shethrives.thrivecart.com/empowered-boundaries/ #notmyshit Journal https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B09P2HMWFF?ie=UTF8&psc=1&linkCode=sl1&tag=christym33-20&linkId=266a98aec073c6e361ea5a2b4e69d95d&language=en_US&ref_=as_li_ss_tl FREE FUN: 4 Minute Empowerment Meditation: 30 Day Toxic Relationships Declutter: https://christyjade.ck.page/toxicdeclutter Abuse Recovery Affirmations: https://christyjade.ck.page/affirmations And if you just wanna peek around and find out more about me and my work..check out my website! It's FUN AND SPARKLY ;) https://www.christyjade.com/ Want to drop me a line or have a question? Email me anytime! fiercemamac@gmail.com Let's connect on social media! https://www.instagram.com/fiercechristyjade/ https://www.tiktok.com/@fiercemamachristy I am Christy Jade, adoring wife, adoptive mama and narcissistic abuse survivor. I now help other women who have gone through abuse (or are going through it) find confidence, power and peace. DOMESTIC ABUSE HOTLINE : 800-799-7233 TRANSCRIPT: Speaker 1: (00:00) Oh my Queens. This one's a hard one. These obsessive thoughts. I have so many clients come to me with this. I went through this. I remember not being able to concentrate at work. Literally having to go to the bathroom and be like, okay, get it together. Focus, because of my narcissistic situation inside of it. And even after we disconnected, it almost became worse in a different way, even though I was actually the one who broke it off with the narcissist. So cozy up, get a little drink, let's hang out. Let's talk about how to stop these obsessive thoughts, how to help stop them. We can't stop them immediately right away, but there are a lot of ways to do that. Also, the podcast episode before this is more about why we have these obsessive thoughts, especially after a narcissistic, abusive situation. So check that out either now or, or save it and listen to it later. Stay tuned for five glorious ways to help us with these obsessive thoughts. Speaker 1: (01:06) Hey, Queens, welcome to, but still she thrives. Do you wanna stop getting caught up in that wicked web of a creepy crawling narcissist? Do you find yourself up late at night replaying the abuse you put up with and wondering how you can heal now? Do you wake up hoping for healthy relationships and peace only to feel totally exhausted and mind effed? Girl, I see you. I'm Christy. I too had to disconnect from toxic people in my life, and I wished I could undo the damage I felt ashamed, lonely, and kind of lost. But I'm a stubborn Italian and I refuse to give up. I found ways to recalibrate my mind and body more quickly than I thought and can now share them with you. In this podcast, you'll find coping tools, healing methods, and confidence boosters so you can trust yourself and find peace and freedom. So, shields up ladies, let's go protect our peace. Speaker 1: (02:03) All right? So first of all, remember, give yourself grace and patience with this process. Nothing is overnight, but it is possible to undo this damage and find peace and freedom from narcissistic abuse. So the first thing I'm gonna say, and this is one that helped me earlier on in the journey, especially when I had to just get out of my head immediately, and that is changing your environment. And it sounds simple, but you've gotta stir up that motivation to do it. First of all, you can't do it without doing it, but change your environment. I would literally go outside, like I said, even if I was at work, if I couldn't get outta my head, I would be like, all right. Hmm. Taking a little elevator ride down to the first floor and going outside, just shaking it off, saying, you know, saying hi to people, even in the lobby of my office, whatever, kind of distracted my brain a little bit to break the the cycle. Speaker 1: (02:59) So changing your actual environment, especially if you have time, you can go and hang out in nature. You can go for a run, pick up the phone, call a friend. Don't talk about the narc though. You've gotta make decisions and choices too, right? So change your environment and change. Change the thoughts, right? Like decide to talk about something else. If you are going to call someone or watch a funny show, like I said, get out, go to a ...
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    15 mins
  • Having Obsessive Thoughts About a Narcissist? 4 Reasons You Can’t Stop

    Having Obsessive Thoughts About a Narcissist? 4 Reasons You Can’t Stop
    Jul 30 2024
    *Top 3% in podcasts globally Do you have obsessive thoughts about a narcissist in your life? In today's episode I share 4 reasons you can't stop thinking about them or the situation. My FREE 4 MINUTE empowering meditation: https://christyjade.ck.page/insider Join my free facebook group here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/christyjade EPISODES MENTIONED: What is GASLIGHTING? (ep 23) https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/ep-23-what-is-gaslighting-the-narcissists-favorite-8/id1662241353?i=1000610540022 The Cycle of Abuse: (ep 6) https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/ep-6-the-cycle-of-abuse-and-how-to-avoid/id1662241353?i=1000596278747 WORK WITH ME: https://www.christyjade.com/transformational-coaching Have trouble setting boundaries in your life? And if you just wanna peek around and find out more about me and my work..check out my website! It's FUN AND SPARKLY ;) https://www.christyjade.com/ Want to drop me a line or have a question? Email me anytime! fiercemamac@gmail.com Let's connect on social media! https://www.instagram.com/fiercechristyjade/ https://www.tiktok.com/@fiercemamachristy After abuse we need SIMPLE. I created a planner for busy women just like you to navigate your days easier: https://christyjade.podia.com/shethrivesplanner I am Christy Jade, adoring wife, adoptive mama and narcissistic abuse survivor. I now help other women who have gone through abuse (or are going through it) find confidence, power and peace. DOMESTIC ABUSE HOTLINE : 800-799-7233 TRANSCRIPT Speaker 1: (00:00) Welcome to, but still she thrives. On today's episode, we are going to talk about all of those nasty, annoying sleep, disturbing stomach ache, causing obsessive thoughts we have over the narcs in our lives. Why can't we stop thinking about them? Stay tuned. Speaker 1: (00:19) Hey, Queens, welcome to, but still she thrives. Do you wanna stop getting caught up in that wicked web of a creepy crawling narcissist and you find yourself up late at night replaying the abuse you put up with and wondering how you can heal Now? Do you wake up hoping for healthy relationships and peace only to feel totally exhausted and mind effed? Girl, I see you. I'm Christy. I too had to disconnect from toxic people in my life and I wished I could undo the damage. I felt ashamed, lonely, and kind of lost. But I'm a stubborn Italian and I refused to give up. I found ways to recalibrate my mind and body more quickly than I thought and can now share them with you. In this podcast, you will find coping tools, healing methods, and confidence boosters so you can trust yourself and find peace and freedom. So, shields up ladies, let's go protect our peace. Speaker 1: (01:17) So I have had more than five clients recently talk about how disruptive the thoughts are, even after disconnection, even when you're out of the relationship. What is going on that I'm still obsessing, I'm still thinking about whether it's the narcissist, the relationship, what they did wrong. There are all of these obsessive thoughts. So let's dive into the why today, and then we're also gonna talk about how to help those thoughts in the next episode. So narcissists tend to target empaths and people who are more thoughtful by nature, right? They're easier targets, lucky us. Woo. So as those types of personalities, we tend to overthink as it is, then you throw in a manipulative narcissist who knows how to create a co-dependent situation with us. If and when we get strong enough to finally get out, which congratulations, by the way, our brain will still be stuck there for a while. Speaker 1: (02:19) And this is normal. This is normal in our situation, okay? For us who we are, and this situation, it's normal. Our brains really want to fix any problem. A lot of us can be people pleasers or we're so trained to please a certain person that our brain wants to fix any problem immediately because we are set up where we feel like, especially in narcissistic, abusive situations, if we don't fix the problem, it's gonna become a bigger problem. We are going to get emotionally or physically abused, right? This is how our brain is set up. So it is very normal for us to want to fix all the problems. So if we can't figure something out, our brain is going to ruminate, ruminate, ruminate. And with narcissist, it's usually a situation that cannot be fixed without disconnecting from them entirely, right? So if you are in the situation, it's even harder because truly living with a narc, you're going to always have these problems. Speaker 1: (03:21) They're always going to to create this dynamic. When you are disconnected, that's great, that's a huge step forward. But there still is work to be done because your brain is set up this way. So it's still trying to problem solve all the time, and it's trying to figure things out. But why do narcissists tend to make the obsession unbearable like it is? Because they've set up this codependent situation. This means they're already ...
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    12 mins