Episodes

  • 12: lovelustfear | debra | i’ve always seemed to attract the crazy type
    Jun 26 2024
    After her marriage is shattered by betrayal, Debra turns to alcohol, descending into addiction. Despite her efforts to maintain sobriety, she becomes entangled in a toxic relationship with an enabler who subjects her to emotional abuse, manipulation, and coercive control. chapters (00:00) listen with caution (00:16) next on lovelustfear (01:38) about debra (02:18) debra’s story (27:03) questions & answers (34:50) closing thoughts (35:36) charity & organizations (36:15) submit your story (36:26) disclaimer quotes “...but the end of that marriage is where I learned to equate chemicals with avoiding pain…alcohol became a problem pretty quickly for me.” - Debra “I just like continued to choose worse and worse partners along the way because I lost my self-respect.” - Debra “So, within record time, I'm like fired from my great job, already have given up the house that I had just re established. And so, at this point, I'm pretty realizing that I'm dependent on him.” - Debra “Anything I told him, any vulnerability I shared with him would become his weapon the next time. It would be whatever he would control me with or, something to make me feel bad about.” - Debra “And the closure will come when you finally see you are enough. Nobody else is going to make you more, you are fine as you are. and it's not something that you can just read a self-help book and get there, but you know, there's people that can help. Help you to see it.” - Debra guest links | debra The Alternative Hair Alchemist | Podcast https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/alternative-hair-alchemist-a-podcast-about/id1627588998 music | sounds Music (CC BY 4.0): Lost Place Atmospheres 002 by Sascha Ende Very Low Note by Kevin MacLeod (https://incompetech.com/) Other Music and Sound Effects by Cybercutie, Geoffrey Harvey, Alex Wit, Syouki Takahashi, Timothy Kulig, Pixabay, Samuel F. Johanns, and UNIVERSFIELD from Pixabay Spacetime by Mountaineer stay aware | follow | share (debra) National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism https://www.niaaa.nih.gov/alcohols-effects-health/niaaa-middle-school/helpful-resources The mission of the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism is to generate and disseminate fundamental knowledge about the adverse effects of alcohol on health and well-being, and apply that knowledge to improve diagnosis, prevention, and treatment of alcohol-related problems, including alcohol use disorder, across the lifespan. National Domestic Violence Hotline (24/7/365) Call 1.800.799.SAFE (7233) Text: START to 88788 https://www.thehotline.org/ https://www.facebook.com/NationalDomesticViolenceHotline https://www.instagram.com/NDVHofficial/ story submission information If you would like to consider being a guest on lovelustfear or would like your story featured anonymously, please contact us below. submission link | https://lovelustfear.aidaform.com/lovelustfear E-mail | lovelustfearpod@gmail.com Instagram | https://www.instagram.com/lovelustfearpod/ subscription links Chartable https://link.chtbl.com/lovelustfear Amazon Music https://music.amazon.com/podcasts/b06d0ea8-cb29-4c3a-98e6-0249d84df748/lovelustfear Spotify https://open.spotify.com/show/0e3ndcf5u8lZ5lhN1lvWec Apple https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/lovelustfear/id1735876283 RSS feed https://audioboom.com/channels/5125912.rss Want to hear more? Whatever app you’re listening on, just rate us and/or leave us a comment or review. Thank you for your support!
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    37 mins
  • lovelustfear | presents | crime salad
    Jun 25 2024
    Ashley and Ricky, the dynamic duo behind Crime Salad, bring their unique perspectives and captivating storytelling to unravel some of the most intriguing criminal cases. With each episode, they dive deep into the details, providing listeners with a thought-provoking exploration of the darker side of humanity. Join them every week as they serve up a chilling dish of true crime that will leave you craving for more.

    Apple
    https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/crime-salad/id1457141569
    Spotify
    https://open.spotify.com/show/3i7DxU0YyDnaMVdDrF4fpG
    Amazon Music
    https://music.amazon.com/podcasts/e46bf5f7-2c1e-4b53-8fe0-b98da37c20df/crime-salad
    Instagram
    https://www.instagram.com/crimesaladpodcast
    Facebook
    https://www.facebook.com/crimesaladpodcast/

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    2 mins
  • lovelustfear | special announcements | june 2024
    Jun 20 2024
    Thank you all for listening and subscribing to lovelustfear. I'm so grateful to all the brave guests who have joined the show and shared their important stories with us.

    If you're listening and eager for more dating and relationship stories, please consider supporting the show by rating and leaving a review wherever you listen.

    Listeners on Spotify can engage with one-click polls after each episode and share their own dating experiences and thoughts on the episodes in the comments.

    https://open.spotify.com/show/0e3ndcf5u8lZ5lhN1lvWec

    And I'm excited to announce lovelustfridays, a panel discussion series available here every other Friday where I invite previous guests and experts for an extended exploration of their stories and give you a chance to submit any questions you have.

    For video previews, check out our Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lovelustfearpod/

    And if you'd like to share your dating and relationship story, I want to hear it.
    You can reach me at lovelustfearpod@gmail.com or: https://www.instagram.com/lovelustfearpod/
    https://lovelustfear.aidaform.com/lovelustfear

    Thank you so much!
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    1 min
  • 11: lovelustfear | kenzi | i think we met awkward twelve minutes ago
    Jun 19 2024
    Following her divorce, Kenzi returned to her hometown and ventured into online dating, where she developed a promising friendship with romantic potential. However, the situation took a dark turn when Kenzi found herself subjected to his disturbing and abusive behavior.

    chapters

    (00:00) listen with caution
    (00:16) next on lovelustfear
    (01:42) about kenzi
    (02:26) kenzi’s story
    (22:00) questions & answers
    (29:22) closing thoughts
    (30:19) charity & organizations
    (30:49) submit your story
    (31:00) disclaimer

    quotes

    “I started to really realize like, okay, I'm going to have to leave this marriage because if I don't leave this marriage at some point, I'm not so sure I'm going to make it out at all.” - Kenzi

    “I have got to rebuild my life. And I finally get to this point where I want to start the process of exploring dating.” - Kenzi

    “And he just looks me dead in the face. And he says, If you're not going or staying the night, I might as well just go ahead and get this over with.” - Kenzi

    “I'm just like, God, please let me get my shoes on and get the fuck out of here, like, please, just let me get the fuck out of here safe, like, please don't let anything happen to me.” - Kenzi

    “And what I would tell them is that you have no idea what somebody is going through until you are standing right in their shoes and you're put into the exact same situation. You don't know how you would react. You don't know how you would act. You don't know what you would say.” - Kenzi

    guest links | kenzi

    Inside The Case | Podcast
    https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/inside-the-case/id1679471501

    Instagram | Kenzi Durbin
    https://www.instagram.com/thisiskenzi_/

    music | sounds

    Music (CC BY 4.0):
    Lost Place Atmospheres 002 by Sascha Ende
    Very Low Note by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)

    Other Music and Sound Effects by Franco Gonzalez, Jan Hill, Alex Wit, Syouki Takahashi, Timothy Kulig, Pixabay, Samuel F. Johanns, UNIVERSFIELD, and TheoJT from Pixabay

    Spacetime by Mountaineer

    stay aware | follow | share (kenzi)

    National Domestic Violence Hotline (24/7/365)
    Call 1.800.799.SAFE (7233)
    Text: START to 88788
    https://www.thehotline.org/
    https://www.facebook.com/NationalDomesticViolenceHotline
    https://www.instagram.com/NDVHofficial/

    story submission information

    If you would like to consider being a guest on lovelustfear or would like your story featured anonymously, please contact us below.

    submission link | https://lovelustfear.aidaform.com/lovelustfear
    E-mail | lovelustfearpod@gmail.com
    Instagram | https://www.instagram.com/lovelustfearpod/

    subscription links

    Chartable
    https://link.chtbl.com/lovelustfear
    Amazon Music
    https://music.amazon.com/podcasts/b06d0ea8-cb29-4c3a-98e6-0249d84df748/lovelustfear
    Spotify
    https://open.spotify.com/show/0e3ndcf5u8lZ5lhN1lvWec
    Apple
    https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/lovelustfear/id1735876283
    RSS feed
    https://audioboom.com/channels/5125912.rss

    Want to hear more? Whatever app you’re listening on, just rate us and/or leave us a comment or review.

    Thank you for your support!

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    31 mins
  • lovelustfear | presents | Cheating: When Love Lies
    Jun 18 2024
    Affairs are prevalent but rarely talked about relationships. The podcast, Cheating: When Love Lies, is a deep dive into the complex emotions surrounding these secret unions.

    Creator and host, Jillian Hamilton, delves into this taboo topic and asks the hard questions about affairs: how common are they, who's having them, and why? These questions illicit unexpected answers that reveal both men and women as people actively seeking something - validation, escape, understanding, vengeance, thrill, love, sex, and romance - outside of marriage or committed partnerships. Cheating: When Love Lies resists the condemnation of affairs as uniquely wrong or bad and instead considers their usefulness in learning as much about relationships as we learn about our ourselves.

    On the podcast, Jillian Hamilton narrates short fictional stories about cheating based on true life events. The narration is followed by a roundtable discussion with everyday people who share their unique perspectives. Jillian also interviews cheaters and betrayed partners. These interviews are raw and real-and at times maddening or heartbreaking.

    Listen now to Cheating: When Love Lies. Are you ready for the truth?

    Apple Podcasts
    https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/cheating-when-love-lies/id1575403464
    Spotify
    https://open.spotify.com/show/51sjxVIFw6QhbtuwIg8166
    Amazon Music
    https://music.amazon.com/podcasts/d862fa78-ec68-43fe-ad28-9df4d0fc8268/cheating-when-love-lies
    Instagram
    https://www.instagram.com/cheatingwhenlovelies/
    Websites
    https://www.jillianhamilton.online/about-podcast-cheating-when-love-lies
    https://www.podcastone.com/pd/Cheating-When-Love-Lies

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    2 mins
  • 10: lovelustfear | kaitlyn | we didn’t have boundaries
    Jun 12 2024
    Despite longing for love and affection, Kaitlyn becomes caught in a cycle of toxic relationships marked by sexual assault, emotional abuse, and physical violence.

    chapters

    (00:00) listen with caution
    (00:16) next on lovelustfear
    (01:21) about kaitlyn
    (02:11) kaitlyn’s story
    (19:02) questions & answers
    (23:30) closing thoughts
    (24:18) charity & organizations
    (24:48) submit your story
    (24:59) disclaimer

    quotes

    “I thought that it was going to be, like, a romance novel because he painted that picture for me.” - Kaitlyn
    “We didn't have boundaries. those, between him and I, those didn't exist.” - Kaitlyn
    “He would wake up and decide that he wanted to be mad at me for something that he dreamt about, and he would take it out on me.” - Kaitlyn
    “I had to get stripped of everything that I'd ever known. So those basic emotions that we get when we're children. I got stripped down to those emotions. in therapy, it was like, you think you understand guilt but you need to learn just happiness.” - Kaitlyn

    music | sounds

    Music (CC BY 4.0):
    Lost Place Atmospheres (002-003) by Sascha Ende
    Very Low Note by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)

    Other Music and Sound Effects by Syouki Takahashi, Timothy Kulig, Pixabay, Samuel F. Johanns, UNIVERSFIELD, and TheoJT from Pixabay

    Spacetime by Mountaineer

    stay aware | follow | share (kaitlyn)

    Cleveland Rape Crisis Center
    https://clevelandrapecrisis.org/
    Cleveland Rape Crisis Center supports survivors of rape and sexual abuse, promotes healing and prevention and advocates for social change.

    Futures Without Violence
    https://www.futureswithoutviolence.org/
    For more than 30 years, FUTURES has been providing groundbreaking programs, policies, and campaigns that empower individuals and organizations working to end violence against women and children around the world.

    National Domestic Violence Hotline (24/7/365)
    Call 1.800.799.SAFE (7233)
    Text: START to 88788
    https://www.thehotline.org/
    https://www.facebook.com/NationalDomesticViolenceHotline
    https://www.instagram.com/NDVHofficial/

    story submission information

    If you would like to consider being a guest on lovelustfear or would like your story featured anonymously, please contact us below.

    submission link | https://lovelustfear.aidaform.com/lovelustfear
    E-mail | lovelustfearpod@gmail.com
    Instagram | https://www.instagram.com/lovelustfearpod/

    subscription links

    Chartable
    https://link.chtbl.com/lovelustfear
    Amazon Music
    https://music.amazon.com/podcasts/b06d0ea8-cb29-4c3a-98e6-0249d84df748/lovelustfear
    Spotify
    https://open.spotify.com/show/0e3ndcf5u8lZ5lhN1lvWec
    Apple
    https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/lovelustfear/id1735876283
    RSS feed
    https://audioboom.com/channels/5125912.rss

    Want to hear more? Whatever app you’re listening on, just rate us and/or leave us a comment or review.

    Thank you for your support!

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    25 mins
  • lovelustfear | presents | L.A. Not So Confidential
    Jun 10 2024
    L.A. Not So Confidential is a True Crime and Forensic Psychology podcast hosted by two Los Angeles - based psychologists currently working in the criminal justice field. Dr. Shiloh & Dr. Scott have a unique perspective on True Crime as residents of the center of the entertainment world and the birthplace of the Noir Crime Genre.

    Listen on Apple
    https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/l-a-not-so-confidential-the-premier/id1293032240

    Listen on Spotify
    https://open.spotify.com/show/21dpgZ5V9I9m2RI8tB8Nr2

    Listen on Amazon Music
    https://music.amazon.com/podcasts/4e44887d-a989-4d5b-afb7-e10fff6b6acb/l-a-not-so-confidential-the-premier-forensic-psychology-podcast

    Website
    https://www.la-not-so-confidential.com/

    Instagram
    https://www.instagram.com/lanotsopodcast/

    TikTok
    https://www.tiktok.com/tag/lanotsoconfidential

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    54 mins
  • 9: lovelustfear | lena | he’s your problem now
    Jun 5 2024
    Lena, compelled by her strict upbringing, marries a culturally appropriate man who promises to provide for her needs. But after discovering his success and adoration are a facade, she finds herself trapped in a marriage of deception, control, and abuse. chapters (00:00) listen with caution (00:16) next on lovelustfear (01:46) about lena (02:47) lena’s story (33:10) questions & answers (37:59) closing thoughts (38:50) charity & organizations (39:19) submit your story (39:30) disclaimer quotes “I came from a traditional Armenian family. my cultural heritage is from Turkey. my grandparents were both survivors of the Armenian genocide. my parents were first generation, I'm second. And I was raised in a very strict household.” - Lena “My father would say conflicting statements like you can do anything you want to do in life as long as you put your mind to it. Whereas my mother on the other side would say a girl's place is in the home taking care of her family.” - Lena “He took me to the most extravagant Restaurant. he was dressed to the nines, and he got me flowers and gifts, and you're beautiful. You're perfect. I've never imagined myself with anybody so wonderful as you and I think that we could build a future together.” - Lena “It progressively got worse and worse and worse. he started to degrade me, and he got very controlling. He told me what I could wear, how I could wear it. how to wear my makeup, how to wear my hair, And he told me what type of underwear to wear, and if I didn't do it, then there was going to be some form of emotional punishment.” - Lena “And she said, ‘You've got 30 minutes to get your cats in their carriers, get your purse on your back, and get out of the house or I'm going to call the police.’” - Lena “...if you're in a situation where you're dealing with a narcissist and you're married to that, start planning, look for a way out. stash money away, get your jewelry, and hide it. And when the time is right, it's going to present itself and you get the hell out when you know you're supposed to leave and don't look back.” - Lena music | sounds Music (CC BY 4.0): Lost Place Atmospheres (001-003) by Sascha Ende Very Low Note by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Other Music and Sound Effects by Syouki Takahashi, Geoffrey Harvey, Alex Wit, cybercutie, Timothy Kulig, Pixabay, Samuel F. Johanns, UNIVERSFIELD, Yevhenii Kovalenko, Leigh Robinson, and Alesiadavina from Pixabay Spacetime by Mountaineer stay aware | follow | share (lena) The Midnight Mission - TMM (Downtown Los Angeles, CA) https://www.midnightmission.org/ https://www.instagram.com/themidnightmission/ Phone: 1.213.624.9258 The Midnight Mission is the oldest continuously operating human service organization in the Los Angeles region. Centered in the Skid Row area of downtown Los Angeles, The Midnight runs one of the most efficient direct service operations in the country. With only five executive managers throughout its 100-year history, The Midnight has been a consistent beacon of light for those with nowhere else to turn. National Domestic Violence Hotline (24/7/365) Call 1.800.799.SAFE (7233) Text: START to 88788 https://www.thehotline.org/ https://www.facebook.com/NationalDomesticViolenceHotline https://www.instagram.com/NDVHofficial/ story submission information If you would like to consider being a guest on lovelustfear or would like your story featured anonymously, please contact us below. submission link | https://lovelustfear.aidaform.com/lovelustfear E-mail | lovelustfearpod@gmail.com Instagram | https://www.instagram.com/lovelustfearpod/ subscription links Chartable https://link.chtbl.com/lovelustfear Amazon Music https://music.amazon.com/podcasts/b06d0ea8-cb29-4c3a-98e6-0249d84df748/lovelustfear Spotify https://open.spotify.com/show/0e3ndcf5u8lZ5lhN1lvWec Apple https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/lovelustfear/id1735876283 RSS feed https://audioboom.com/channels/5125912.rss Want to hear more? Whatever app you’re listening on, just rate us and/or leave us a comment or review. Thank you for your support!
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    40 mins