This episode unpacks the vital connection between our nervous system and how we lead—in business, at home, and in life. Sarah dives into the science of regulation, exploring how dysregulated states like fight/flight, freeze, or shut down often drive our decisions, keeping us stuck in survival mode. These patterns, rooted in past experiences of stress or trauma, influence how we show up as leaders, parents, and creators.

With clear explanations and actionable tools, Sarah offers a roadmap for recognizing when we’re leading from dysregulation. She shares how to cultivate a regulated nervous system, unlocking creativity, connection, and clarity. Whether you're looking to grow a business, nurture your family, or simply lead yourself with more purpose, this episode offers the practical steps to create the life—and leadership—you desire.

Episode Highlights

00:00 Intro

00:26 Leading from a State of Regulation

01:20 Entrepreneurs Have Higher Stress Levels

04:28 The Most Important Thing Parents Should Focus on

06:43 Your Nervous System Affects Everyone Else

08:23 Leading from Sympathetic (fight/flight)

11:05 Leading from Regulation (safety)

13:36 Leading from Dorsal (shut down)

15:27 Leading from Freeze (tonic immobility)

17:42 Consistent Neural Exercises

20:41 How to Reshape Your Nervous System

23:02 The Key to Somatic Manifestation

26:57 Anchoring in Your Adult Self

32:30 Trust Your Own Pacing

38:19 Embodying Your Purpose

Take Sarah’s FREE Quiz:

Ready to learn more about your nervous system specific to you? Take Sarah’s free quiz, “What’s Keeping You Stuck?” for a personalized guide and powerful somatic tools to help you gain control over your experience.

https://bit.ly/yms-sp-quiz

Connect with Sarah on:

Website - https://www.sarahbaldwincoaching.com/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/sarahbcoaching/

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/Sarahbaldwincoaching/

Submit a Question:

https://sarahbaldwin1.typeform.com/podcast

Important Keywords:

• Nervous System Regulation - The practice of bringing your system into safety in presence, which supports effective leadership, whether in business, parenting, or personal growth. Being in regulation allows for more creativity, clarity, and connection while reducing the reactive tendencies of stress and overwhelm.
• Ventral Vagal Complex - Your state of presence, safety, and connection where creativity, connection, and problem-solving thrive. It’s the optimal state for leadership and decision-making, allowing leaders to see possibilities and act with confidence.
• Co-Regulation - The process of connecting with another person in safety where each person's nervous system positively influences the others’. In leadership and parenting, co-regulation can set the tone for calm and productivity, creating a ripple effect in teams or families.
• Dysregulation - When your nervous system senses a threat (whether real or perceived), it sends you into dysregulation or active self-protection. Leading from this place can often result in stress, burnout, or stagnation.
• Capacity Building - Capacity building involves gradually increasing our ability to handle new or challenging situations. It’s about expanding the nervous system's tolerance and adaptability through small, intentional experiences of growth.

In this special New Year’s episode, Sarah invites listeners to reimagine the way they approach goals and resolutions. Kicking off the five-part Somatic Starter Kit series, Sarah dives into four reasons why traditional New Year’s resolutions often fail and offers transformative science-backed tools to use instead. You’ll learn how unresolved past experiences and traumas can keep you stuck in cycles of unmet goals.

Listeners will learn the importance of taking tolerable steps, building nervous system regulation, and fostering safe connection to support personal growth. Sarah also shares actionable insights on cultivating self-compassion, replacing coping strategies with healthier habits, and understanding the deeper desires that drive us. The episode is both a manual for self-discovery and a compassionate reminder that you make sense, just as you are.

Episode Highlights

00:00 Intro

02:26 Reason 1: We Aren’t Addressing Our Nervous System

05:05 Do You Feel Like You’re Behind in Life?

07:03 Connecting to What You Truly Desire

09:41 Reason 2: Our Desires Often Have Flavorings of Past Danger

14:03 Reason 3: We Aren’t Addressing Our Parts

19:07 Reason 4: Lack of Support and Connection

24:19 Safe Support and Connection is Crucial

25:21 Take Tolerable Steps Towards Your Desires

30:17 Consistent Regulation of Your Nervous System

31:37 Work at the Rate of Your Most Apprehensive Part

37:39 Relation Between Money and the Nervous System

46:00 What is a Coping Strategy?

53:54 How Do You Know Your Life’s Purpose?

01:01:36 Trying Something New Can Feel Overwhelming

Join the Navigating Your Nervous System Waitlist:

Want access to limited-time pricing for Sarah’s upcoming 6-week course? Make sure to get on the waitlist for Navigating Your Nervous System by January 5th to take advantage of the 24-hour only $100 off bonus.

https://bit.ly/sp-nyns-waitlist

Connect with Sarah on:

Website - https://www.sarahbaldwincoaching.com/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/sarahbcoaching/

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/Sarahbaldwincoaching/

Submit a Question:

https://sarahbaldwin1.typeform.com/podcast

Important Keywords:

• Nervous System Regulation - This refers to practices that help balance the body's stress response, promoting a state of calm and safety. By regulating the nervous system, we can better handle challenges, make intentional choices, and build resilience in the face of discomfort or fear.
• Coping Strategies - These are habits or behaviors developed to manage discomfort or stress, often unconsciously. While they can serve as short-term relief, understanding and replacing maladaptive strategies with healthier alternatives promotes long-term well-being.
• Somatic Healing - Somatic healing focuses on reconnecting with the body to release tension and process trauma. This approach integrates physical sensations, emotions, and thoughts to foster self-awareness and recovery.
• Parts Work - This therapeutic concept involves recognizing and addressing different "parts" or aspects of ourselves, often tied to past experiences or emotional wounds. By understanding and integrating these parts, we can move toward greater wholeness and self-compassion.
• Safe Connection - Safe connection refers to relationships where we feel seen, valued, and accepted without judgment. These connections are essential for emotional and nervous system regulation, providing a foundation for personal growth.
• Capacity Building - Capacity building involves gradually increasing our ability to handle new or challenging situations. It’s about expanding the nervous system's tolerance and adaptability through small, intentional experiences of growth.
• Dysregulation - Dysregulation occurs when the nervous system is stuck in states of fight, flight, freeze, or shutdown. It manifests as heightened anxiety, emotional overwhelm, or disconnection and requires mindful practices to return to a balanced state.

This episode dives into the ups and downs of healing and why it can sometimes feel like you’re moving backward instead of forward. Sarah breaks down how coming back into our bodies is a marker of progress — but that it can also feel overwhelming at first. Experiencing grief, anger, or other deep emotions can all be signs of the work you’ve done.

With real-life examples and simple, science-backed advice, Sarah shares how to move beyond just “knowing” about your patterns and into healing in a way that actually creates change. You’ll learn how to regulate your nervous system, work with your younger parts, and create space for more connection and joy.

Episode Highlights

00:00 Intro

00:40 Why Healing Can Feel Like You’re Going Backward

05:34 Information Gathering is Not Enough

07:29 Why We Become Disembodied

11:03 Healing is the Hero’s Journey

15:31 Trauma & Energy Wells

21:33 What To Look For in a Therapist or Practitioner

31:20 Receiving & Working With Young Parts

38:00 Why Do We Experience Chronic Dysregulation?

42:56 Sarah’s Journey

Join Sarah’s Email Community:

Looking for more FREE resources? Click below to join Sarah’s email community for additional teachings and somatic tools to support you on your healing journey.

https://bit.ly/yms-sp-newsletter

Connect with Sarah on:

Website - https://www.sarahbaldwincoaching.com/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/sarahbcoaching/

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/Sarahbaldwincoaching/

Submit a Question:

https://sarahbaldwin1.typeform.com/podcast

Important Keywords:

• Nervous system - The nervous system is a self-protective system that determines your emotions, behaviors, and overall experience. It responds to safety, real threats, and perceived threats, influencing how you react and regulate in different situations.
• Regulation - We can only experience regulation when our nervous system believes we are safe. Our primary state of regulation is our Ventral Vagal Complex, where we experience things like joy, connection, presence, groundedness, and feeling “here.”
• Trauma - Trauma refers to overwhelming experiences that the body and mind were unable to process fully at the time they occurred. These unresolved energies get stuck and stored in the body, impacting mental and physical well-being until they are resolved.
• Healing - Healing is the journey of addressing past wounds—both physical and emotional—to achieve greater freedom and alignment in life. It involves learning to regulate the nervous system, release stored trauma, and tending to younger parts of ourselves.
• Dysregulation - Dysregulation occurs when the nervous system believes we are in danger, whether it is a real or perceived threat. Chronic dysregulation is often a result of unresolved trauma and can significantly impact daily functioning.
• Internal Safety - Creating safety within our bodies and nervous system is the foundation of healing. This is what we are working toward when we take steps to regulate our nervous system.

In this heartfelt episode of You Make Sense, Sarah explores the often-overlooked emotional complexities of the holiday season. While the holidays are often painted as a time of joy and togetherness, Sarah acknowledges the undercurrent of loneliness, grief, and stress that many experience. She unpacks how societal expectations and past experiences can amplify these emotions, offering relatable insights and actionable tools to help listeners navigate this season with more ease.

Sarah delves into the somatic roots of grief and loneliness, using Parts Work to differentiate between our adult self and younger parts. From tending to these younger parts to finding solace in music, nature, and intentional connection, this episode offers a blueprint for transforming holiday challenges into opportunities for healing and self-discovery.

Episode Highlights

00:00 Intro

02:09 Reasons the Holidays Can Be Challenging

06:58 Connecting to the Unmet Need

09:05 Why We Struggle to Process Grief

13:34 Step 1: Grief is Best Processed Through Connection

15:06 Step 2: What Parts of You Are Struggling?

15:45 Step 3: Focus on Nourishing Yourself

17:03 Step 4: Connection

19:42 Identify Which Part of You is Feeling Sad

30:46 How to Process Death and Loss

39:50 Coupling Dynamics & the Holidays

49:42 “Why Do I Drink More Around My Family?”

Join the Navigating Your Nervous System Waitlist:

Want access to limited-time pricing for Sarah’s upcoming 6-week course? Make sure to get on the waitlist for Navigating Your Nervous System by January 5th to take advantage of the 24-hour only $100 off bonus.

https://bit.ly/sp-nyns-waitlist

Connect with Sarah on:

Website - https://www.sarahbaldwincoaching.com/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/sarahbcoaching/

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/Sarahbaldwincoaching/

Submit a Question:

https://sarahbaldwin1.typeform.com/podcast

Important Keywords:

• Loneliness - Loneliness is the feeling of being disconnected or isolated from others, often heightened during the holidays when societal messages emphasize togetherness. Sarah highlights how loneliness can stem from unmet needs, relational trauma, or past experiences and encourages using somatic tools and Parts Work to address it.
• Grief - Grief is the emotional response to loss, encompassing not only what happened but also what never was. Sarah explains how grief surfaces when we feel safe enough to process it and encourages gentle, titrated processing of these emotions to create space for healing and growth.
• Connection - Connection is a fundamental human need that fosters a sense of belonging and emotional safety. Sarah emphasizes the importance of cultivating meaningful connections with others, nature, and ourselves, as these relationships are key to navigating emotional challenges.
• Parts work - Parts work is a therapeutic approach that acknowledges and tends to different aspects of the self, particularly younger parts carrying past wounds. Sarah discusses how identifying and comforting these parts can bring clarity and healing during emotionally challenging times.
• Regulation - Regulation is the process of bringing the nervous system into safety and balance, allowing us to respond to situations from a calm, grounded place. Sarah suggests somatic practices such as mindfulness, movement, and connection to achieve regulation and build emotional resilience.
• Healing - Healing is the process of addressing past traumas, unmet needs, and emotional pain to create space for growth and well-being. Sarah frames healing as an ongoing journey of self-compassion, connection, and transformation, particularly relevant during challenging emotional periods.

Do you find romantic partnerships challenging, confusing, or overwhelming? Sarah is going to walk you through what is necessary to heal your attachment wounds and come toward more secure, healthy relationships. Although it might seem counterintuitive, the kind of connection we’re desiring often doesn’t “feel good” at first. In fact, our first experience of a secure attachment can range from being boring — to completely terrifying.

The good news is that this doesn’t necessarily mean the relationship is wrong for you! In this episode, you’ll learn the neuroscience behind why healthy love can initially feel overwhelming or unexciting. But the more that we step toward safe connection, the deeper and more intimate our relationships become, giving us a container where we can truly be seen, known, and chosen.

Episode Highlights

00:00 Intro

01:01 Earned Secure Attachment

06:12 The Good Doesn’t Feel Good at First

08:45 Why A Secure Attachment Can Feel Boring

10:08 Love from Choice vs Love from Survival

16:33 Why A Secure Attachment Can Feel Terrifying

24:00 Leaning into a Secure Attachment

29:40 “Why Do I Feel Like I’m Going Backwards?”

30:52 Building Capacity for Vulnerability and Exposure

35:06 The Beautiful Orphaned Parts of Us

39:43 How to Know if the Lack of Attraction is Normal

46:37 Regret Is an Opportunity for Self-Compassion & Learning

52:01 Perceived Threats in Relationships

01:06:01 Even with Loving Parents, Relationships Can Be Hard

Grab Sarah’s FREE Workbook:

Ready to gain control over your life? Click below to download Sarah’s free trauma-informed workbook. This in-depth guide will help you to harness the power of your nervous system and unlock your desires.

https://bit.ly/yms-sp-workbook

Connect with Sarah on:

Website - https://www.sarahbaldwincoaching.com/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/sarahbcoaching/

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/Sarahbaldwincoaching/

Submit a Question:

https://sarahbaldwin1.typeform.com/podcast

Important Keywords:

• Secure Attachment - A safe, stable way of attaching and relating to others in our relationships that forms in our early childhood from having caregivers who could consistently meet our needs for love, safety, attunement, and connection.
• Earned Secure Attachment - A secure attachment that develops through intentional self-work and healing from past patterns. It reflects personal growth and the ability to attract healthier relationships by creating internal safety for yourself and your younger parts.
• Neuroception - Your body's internal threat detector that is constantly assessing whether you’re in safety, danger, or life-threatening danger. It decides this by looking to a database of past information that holds all your lived experiences.
• Parts Work - A therapeutic process that involves connecting with and healing younger parts of yourself that hold onto past wounds. It’s a core tool for building internal safety and reshaping how you show up in relationships.
• Trauma Bond - A strong emotional connection formed through cycles of highs and lows in an unstable relationship. Often mistaken for love, trauma bonds are rooted in survival instincts and unresolved past pain.
• Protective Parts - Younger parts that learned to keep you from past emotional harm by creating walls, avoidance, control, or sabotage. Even if the past is over, these well-intentioned parts can keep you from fully engaging in healthy relationships.
• Capacity Building - The process of gradually expanding your emotional tolerance for safety, love, and connection. It involves learning to sit with discomfort as you adjust to the steady, healthy love you’ve always wanted.

This episode pulls back the curtain on how our “younger selves” often influence the way we show up in our adult lives. From the perfectionist to the procrastinator, these protective parts develop in response to early or past experiences of feeling unsafe or overwhelmed. If we have yet to come to the aid of these parts, they will continue to show up in an effort to keep our vulnerable parts safe, often keeping us stuck in cycles that no longer serve us.

Using science-backed concepts and practical tools, Sarah guides listeners on how to recognize and calm these parts so that our adult selves can take charge. By differentiating ourselves from these parts, unburdening these protectors, and coming to the aid of the vulnerable part they are protecting, it’s possible to start living in alignment with our highest self—and navigate the world with more freedom.

Episode Highlights

00:00 Intro

00:16 Are Your Young Parts Running the Show?

01:10 Understanding Somatic Parts Work

06:10 The Power of Internal Coregulation

07:43 What is a Protector Part?

09:08 The Doer Part

15:23 The Perfectionist Part

21:21 The Procastinator Part

28:18 Adult Life Can Be Overwhelming

30:18 Building Capacity to Be in Your Adult Self

32:24 Unburdening the Protector Parts

35:07 Supporting the Most Vulnerable Part

37:52 “How Do We Know How Many Parts There Are?”

44:36 Learning to Differentiate From Your Parts

51:29 Why Do We Experience Roadblocks?

Take Sarah’s FREE Quiz:

Ready to learn more about your nervous system specific to you? Take Sarah’s free quiz, “What’s Keeping You Stuck?” for a personalized guide and powerful somatic tools to help you gain control over your experience.

https://bit.ly/yms-sp-quiz

Connect with Sarah on:

Website - https://www.sarahbaldwincoaching.com/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/sarahbcoaching/

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/Sarahbaldwincoaching/

Submit a Question:

https://sarahbaldwin1.typeform.com/podcast

Important Keywords:

• Parts Work - A therapeutic approach that involves understanding and working with different “parts” of oneself, especially those that have been influenced by past experiences or trauma.
• Most Vulnerable Parts - Younger versions of ourselves that fragment off when we experience trauma, harm, or overwhelm and essentially get “stuck” in that painful experience until we can come to their aid as our adult self.
• Protector Parts - These are also younger versions of ourselves that develop as a way to keep the most vulnerable part safe, often through controlling behaviors, avoiding risks, or overachieving to make sure the vulnerable part never has to feel that pain again.
• Internal Co-Regulation - A process of self-soothing, where the adult self learns to comfort and integrate these young parts, providing them with the care and safety they lacked in the past.
• Neuroception - The brain’s subconscious detection of safety or threat, which shapes how we react to situations based on internal “safety” signals and past memories.
• Internal Family Systems (IFS) - A therapeutic model often referenced in Parts Work, which sees the self as made up of multiple parts, each with its own role, memory, and emotional state.

This episode uncovers the hidden roles we carry in relationships—roles that often date back to our earliest experiences and shape how we connect with others. From being the “caretaker” to the “perfectionist,” these familiar patterns tend to influence our choices and interactions long after childhood, even if that role no longer serves us.

With tools grounded in neuroscience and practical guidance, this conversation dives into what it takes to rewrite those outdated scripts. Listeners will learn simple steps to heal the past, break free from conditioned reactions, and start building relationships that align with who they truly are. It’s absolutely possible to embody a new role and make room for the connections that genuinely feel right.

Episode Highlights

00:00 Intro

00:33 Why Do We Play the Roles We Play?

02:19 Family Systems & the Origin of Our Roles

07:13 Secure Attachment & Healthy Family Plays

10:19 Many of Us Did Not Have a Healthy Family System

13:57 Choosing Partners & “Compatability”

17:21 Healing Allows us to Write a New Role

21:45 The Bumpy Road of Healing

27:59 “How Can You Get Comfortable in Receiving When You’re a Giver?”

39:06 Being of Service vs. Being of Sacrifice

46:44 Why We Disconnect from Our Emotions

54:16 “How Do You Forgive?”

Waitlist Bonus Coming in 2025:

Ready to start feeling better in the New Year? Navigating Your Nervous System is a 6-week, live course focused on the most important foundation of healing: nervous system regulation.

Join the NYNS waitlist by January 5th for limited-time reduced pricing!

https://bit.ly/sp-nyns-waitlist

Connect with Sarah on:

Website - https://www.sarahbaldwincoaching.com/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/sarahbcoaching/

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/Sarahbaldwincoaching/

Submit a Question:

https://sarahbaldwin1.typeform.com/podcast

Important Keywords:

• Nervous System - The nervous system is central to understanding our emotional and relational patterns. It holds the embodied experience of past memories and influences how we respond to others, shaping the roles we play in our lives.
• Roles - The patterns we adopt in relationships, often influenced by early family dynamics. Common roles include caretaker, perfectionist, scapegoat, and the helpless one, which define how we interact with others. Changing these roles allows us to step out of limiting patterns and embrace more fulfilling connections.
• Family System - The family system is the foundation of our relational blueprint. It establishes our initial roles and influences how we navigate social dynamics, often carrying over into adult relationships.
• Attachment - Attachment refers to the emotional bonds formed with primary caregivers, impacting how we relate to others. Secure attachment fosters healthier relationships, while insecure attachment can lead to self-protective behaviors and dynamics. Healing attachment wounds enables us to build stable, supportive connections.
• Healing - Healing is the process of releasing old roles and expanding the nervous system’s capacity for change. It involves recognizing and shedding survival patterns and replacing them with practices that honor our true selves. Healing is an empowering journey toward self-discovery and authentic relationships.
• Patterns - Patterns are recurring behaviors that shape how we interact with others. These automatic responses often stem from unresolved past experiences and can hold us back. Using a somatic approach to transform these patterns is key to stepping into new roles and fostering growth.

Ever feel like stepping into a bigger life is tougher than it should be? In this episode, Sarah breaks down why we get stuck in old patterns and how our nervous system shapes the life we’re currently living. You’ll learn why even good changes—like deeper relationships or exciting career moves—can feel overwhelming or lead to self-sabotage.

Using science-backed concepts and tools, Sarah will teach you how to practically build your nervous system’s capacity to hold the life you’re really wanting. By taking small, tolerable steps and working at the rate of your most apprehensive part, it’s possible to work with your nervous system to move toward a life full of connection and joy.

Episode Highlights

00:00 Intro

00:32 Living the Bigger Life

06:19 The Process of Building Our Capacity

13:42 Our Purpose Often Leads to Our Healing

17:39 What Lights You Up?

19:36 How to Begin Working with Your Nervous System

23:38 We Must Embody Where We Are Going

28:05 One Tolerable Step at a Time

30:49 There’s Always Room to Expand and Grow

36:45 What to do When Good Opportunities Overwhelm Us

41:29 Tangible Steps Toward Being Seen

Grab Sarah’s FREE Workbook:

Ready to gain control over your life? Click below to download Sarah’s free trauma-informed workbook. This in-depth guide will help you to harness the power of your nervous system and unlock your desires.

https://bit.ly/yms-sp-workbook

Connect with Sarah on:

Website - https://www.sarahbaldwincoaching.com/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/sarahbcoaching/

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/Sarahbaldwincoaching/

Submit a Question:

https://sarahbaldwin1.typeform.com/podcast

Important Keywords:

• “Self-Sabotage” - This term can often feel shaming, but it is simply the nervous system’s way of protecting us from what it doesn’t yet know is safe by pushing away or leaving things we might actually deeply desire.
• Building Capacity - The gradual process of training the nervous system to hold more of the “good” in life and tolerate changes or stressors without triggering overwhelm. This is done by gently stepping toward new, safe experiences of what was once dangerous or inhibited in the past (like: being seen, taking up space, making mistakes, etc.).
• Nervous System Regulation - Techniques and strategies used to calm and stabilize the nervous system. Regulation helps move the body out of a fight/flight, freeze, or shut down responses and into a balanced state of presence and connection.
• “The Invisible Wall” - A term coined by Sarah used to describe what it feels like when we try to step toward what we’re wanting but are met with resistance and dysregulation within our nervous system.
• Parts Work - This approach seeks to integrate the fragmented younger parts of ourselves by coming to their aid and giving them love, safety, attunement, and connection. Under the umbrella of Parts Work, Internal Family Systems is the most well-known modality.
• Tolerable Steps - Small, bite-sized actions taken to gradually introduce new experiences and reduce the nervous system's stress response. These steps are essential for building internal safety and making sustainable progress toward larger goals.