Some prophecies are bunkum! How do we know? Well, the prophesied things never came to fruition! But what if a prophecy came from a hen? And I can promise you it’s not what you think. Today Iain covers the story of the Yorkshire Witch in a tale so wicked, you’ll have your wallets stolen.

And how many times have you thought “I need some money, I could go on a gameshow!” Well, THINK AGAIN! Because today Jordan tells us how it’s ain’t all peaches and cream, as he describes some gameshows that have unfortunately seen the light of day when perhaps they shouldn’t have. From hungry lizards to holidaying in a sock, today we really have got it all covered.

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Are you thinking about moving home? Or are you getting married? Well, take today’s episode as FAIR WARNING! As we discussed every and all possibilities that could go wrong with both!

Iain tells us of the Smurl family and their battle with ghosts in the house they bought to make their family home. Truly shocking paranormal events, far worse than anything you’ve ever heard before! (As told by Iain)

And if you might think you’re safe on your wedding day; your own special day - you’d be wrong! So listen up and take notes as Jordan tells us some of the weirdest things that has gone on at weddings. Dads trying to steal brides? Best men trying to steal money? DEATH!? We’ve got it all today! So strap in, pay your stamp duty, and let’s toast! To Mondays! 🥂🍻

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This week Iain talks us through a mystery that sees an entire family dead. Who did it? Why did it happen? No one truly knows, but the strangest part is the circumstances that surround it; so get your Cluedo cap on and see if you can work it out! ‘Cos we sure can’t.

And then Jordan tells us some of the weirdest medical conditions that can plague us humans. From the weird to the incredibly uncomfortable, we’re sure you wouldn’t want to experience any of these. And we sure hope you don’t.

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Gather round, creepy story and BOOze lovers alike! This Halloween on TGWU, the Guys are having a party - and you’re all invited! So grab your cocktails, and a rotisserie chicken, as we sit beside the campfire for a whole episode filled with scary stories, creepy mysteries, spooky-inspired cocktails, laughs, Iain not getting the meaning of Halloween, and even a small quiz! It’s a scarily fun-packed episode and we’re sure you’ll be howling at the moon with laughter. I hope that’s enough Halloween themed references for you, Jordan! God, you’re so demanding. Oh s**t the speech to text is still typing to what I’m saying. Please stop. Hey Siri! Stop! Siri st

COCKTAIL LIST!

VAMPIRE DELIGHT

2 shots lemon-lime soda (we used 7up)

2 shots cranberry juice

1 shot blood orange syrup (we used orange gin - poor decision)

2 shots vodka

SPOOKY HALLOWEEN COCKTAIL

4 shots orange juice

2 shots tonic water

1/2 shot lemon juice

1/2 shot agave syrup

2 shots vodka

HOCUS POCUS PUNCH

4 shots cider (we used Katy cider)

2 shots cranberry juice

1.5 shots orange seltzer (we used off brand fizzy orange drink)

1 shot ginger ale

VAMPIRE'S KISS

1.5 shots vodka

1/2 shot lime juice

1/4 shot cherry syrup (we used cherry brandy)

1 shot cola chilled

1 shot club soda

Sprig of rosemary garnish (we didn't put this in)

HOCUS POCUS BERRY COCKTAIL

4 shots blueberry juice

4 shots filtered water

1/2 shots agave syrup

1 shot lemon juice

1/4 cup blueberries (we didn't add these)

1/4 cup blackberries (or these)

2 shots vodka

Cinnamon for garnish (or this)

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The world is filled with mysteries, as we’ve come to find out. But what if one of these mysteries isn’t some cryptid, isn’t an alien or some creepy spirit, but actually something that exists is every single situation we encounter daily. Shadows! Sentient shadows! Today Iain tells us about the spooky (supposed) reality that is shadow people! What they are, what they do, and what to do if you see one! It’s all covered in today’s episode.

And then Jordan takes a long hard look at the English language. This linguist wannabe looks at the sayings that we’ve all come to love and shows us just how wrong we are. He even gives us extended and long forgotten versions of popular sayings that might even change the meaning of what we’ve come to know them as today! Did you know any of these extended phrases?

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Sometimes people take flights. Sometimes for reasons of national security. And then sometimes the pilot gets abducted by aliens. And that is exactly the kind of story Iain has for us today; one of the strangest disappearances recorded in the UK. It’s the story of Captain Schaffer and the day he disappeared.

And then Jordan thinks “I once did a thing on the world’s worst cocktails - not good enough” and brings us some of the strangest food combos that the internet has to offer. Real food combos that seem like they don’t go together but apparently they do? You be the judge! On today’s episode with the Guys.

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This week, Iain uncovers the horrific situation one family found themselves in, when their house came under attack from a spirit wielding an iPhone - amongst other things. From evil teddies to nasty notes, find out how this family finally rid themselves of the malevolent spirit once and for all.

Then Jordan gives us a, maybe slightly unethical, laugh as he tells us about some people who knocked themselves off our mortal plane in the silliest of ways; thus claiming the prestigious “Darwin Award”. And our laughing at this is perhaps made worse by the fact that it’s part 2! Part 1 can be found over on Patreon as part of our world-famous bonus episodes.

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Us Two Guys would like to start this episode by saying that we take no pleasure in the death of beloved animals or pets. Now, with that out of the way, you're probably thinking, “What on earth are these two idiots going to talk about today?” whilst holding your face in your hands. But trust us, by the end of this episode, it’ll all make sense and you’ll be just as shocked and astounded as we were.

First up, Iain shares the bizarre story of a couple of heads that, once unearthed, wreaked havoc in the unsuspecting town of Hexham.

Then, Jordan fills us in on the strangest, most shocking, and most slapstick WTF ways people’s pet hamsters have met their end, as reported by the internet.

It’s a weird one. Hug your pets tonight.

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