In the previous edition, we discussed the position of the person who controls and who sometimes can be abusive and violent. In this edition, we focus on the person who feels controlled or abused. We explain the intention of the one who controls: to prevent the loss of the loved one. Because the person has difficulty trusting they deserve love, they are afraid of losing their partner and cannot trust in their love.

This becomes a problem for the partner who, despite all the efforts to show love, is unable to reassure their insecure partner. In addition, receiving protests and accusations from their insecure partner causes them to react in ways that seem to suggest they don't love their partner. This creates a cycle that causes suffering to both partners.

In this episode, we discuss a tendency among some partners to control their loved ones. We try to understand the underlying motivation behind their need to control and offer suggestions for overcoming it.

We explain that controlling behavior stems from difficulty believing that one is lovable, which leads the person to doubt their partner. There is a lack of trust in the other person and a tendency to think that the other person doesn't care and wants to abandon the relationship. This causes the person to complain, demand, and control their partner to guarantee they won't lose them. However, this controlling behavior can cause the very loss that the person fears.

Stress not only hurts the stressed person but also those around them. If you are stressed, you can be sure it affects your loved ones. Now you have two problems: your stress and its impact on the important people in your life. Something that can greatly reduce stress is vulnerability. Sharing what you feel brings you closer to your loved ones and helps them empathize with you. As a result, your stress may become a way to get closer to those you love.

One factor that often attracts people romantically is their differences. When these differences are not too extreme, individuals may feel drawn to partners who complement them in ways that are opposite. For example, an introverted person may feel attracted to an extrovert, and someone who speaks little may be drawn to a more talkative partner. However, cultural differences can sometimes create challenges in romantic relationships.

People who grow up with different customs and learn to express love in specific ways within their family of origin may feel unloved or unimportant when their partner shows affection differently. As a result, they may pressure their partner to change to align with their own customs, and wonder why the partner resists. This resistance is often interpreted as a lack of love rather than a difference in emotional expression.

If you have a loved one who has an addiction, you might have realized a long time ago that you feel disconnected from that person. You might seek their attention and protest the distance. However, they resist your plea for connection, and they make their addiction their priority. This causes you to feel secondary, unimportant, and abandoned. You noticed that your loved one prefers the addiction to you.

Addiction is where people go when they feel disconnected. The pain of being disconnected from a loved one is too big for someone to face. To cope with the loneliness caused by the disconnection, people seek an alternative that ends up becoming an addiction. After a while, the person gets attached to the addiction and no longer connects to a human being.

In this episode of Thriving Your Love, we try to help you see that you can find the way back to human connection. Even though you might be afraid of being let down or hurt, nothing will give your life more meaning and purpose than connecting with your loved one. If you look around, you'll notice someone is asking for your attention and feeling deprived of you. They fight for your emotional presence because they love you and they think you're worthy of fighting for.

In our latest podcast, Addiction: The Remedy for Loneliness, we explore the growing epidemic of loneliness and how people often turn to addictions as substitutes for genuine human connection. This pattern often begins in childhood, when children are unable to form secure bonds with their caregivers for various reasons. The pain of loneliness can feel so unbearable that they seek ways to numb it, turning to substances or behaviors that provide temporary relief and serve as replacements for attachment figures. Over time, these substitutes become the primary source of comfort, making it increasingly difficult to build or sustain real emotional connections.

In the latest episode of Thriving Your Love, Trisha and Claudio revisited a powerful question: What is the true cost of being right? Beneath our arguments, our yelling, and our frustration often lies something much more vulnerable—a desire to feel loved, valued, and safe.

In this podcast, Tricia and I explore how anger can sometimes be a protest—a cry from someone who doesn't feel loved, valued, or respected by the person closest to them. At its core, anger can be a cry for attention: a longing to be treated as someone special and to hold a meaningful place in the life of a loved one. Anger can also arise as an attempt to protect those we care about deeply. We may feel angry when we see a loved one heading toward harm, making choices that could bring pain, or missing out on opportunities to grow. In these moments, anger reflects our desire for them to be safe, successful, and fulfilled. Yet, when anger shows up—whether in ourselves or in others—it's often difficult to recognize the love beneath it. Instead, we may see only hostility or hurtful intent. In this episode, we challenge those negative views and invite our listeners to look deeper, to uncover the positive intentions hidden within anger. Finally, we encourage you to channel anger in more constructive ways: to clarify the loving motivations that fuel it and to express the care and concern that lie beneath.