When I was little, I sucked at Hide and Go Seek. I trusted everybody and didn't know how to lie. As I grew, I learned to blame my brother for everything. And so it began, if something was wrong it was someone else's fault. I began learning how to play games with truth.

They say when you start drinking you stop growing, but I was introduced to a new concept today. When I started drinking, I started unlearning the spirituality of my childhood. I learned how to be cautious of other people. I learned how to say I was fine when I wasn’t. I learned how to lie, and I learned how to hide.

Our experiences in life build our character. The older people get the more character they have, right? Just like anything old that has a lot of character, it must be maintained to higher degree. When I began drinking, I stopped maintaining my character. When I got sober, I needed to do the hard work necessary to chip away at the damage caused by not maintaining the spirituality I had as a little girl.

I unravelled in tears at the end of this episode, and I'm not afraid to share it—that's where deep healing lives in recovery.

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Visit me at ⁠⁠⁠recoverydailypodcast.com⁠⁠⁠ or email me at ⁠rachel@recoverydailypodcast.com⁠.
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