People who tell you to be grateful when you’re unhappy are more harmful than helpful. They are making you even more unhappy, and making you feel guilty for feeling ungrateful. Don't listen to people who have no idea what you are going through. Don't force yourself to be grateful. Instead, feel your pain, feel your suffering, feel your sadness. Don't skip that and go straight to feeling grateful. Don't count your blessings when you are not ready. Gratitude is not something you do, or something that can be forced. That's fake gratitude that doesn't last. Real gratitude comes only when you heal yourself, or when you are on a spiritual journey of healing. If you rely on counting your blessings or think about all the things to be grateful for, it doesn't necessarily last. No external comfort, or circumstance can make you grateful for long. It’s temporary. To be happy, and to love yourself, stop listening to others, and listen to yourself. Listen to your body. If you’re in pain, feel it. If you’re suffering, feel it. If you're sad, feel it. Don’t listen to toxic positivity from people who have no idea what you are going through. Healing can only happen if you face all the demons and banish them from your life. Then gratitude comes easily.

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Have you been told to be the “bigger person”? Have you been told that you’re selfish for refusing to be the punching bag? And do you feel guilty for walking away? Scapegoats have been trained to be everyone's punching bag and trashcan since childhood. Of course you would feel guilty for refusing to continue. You need to recalibrate your thinking. Wanting to be heard, wanting respect for how you feel is the bare minimum! Stop taking the advice of those that tell you to be "the bigger person" when they mean keep quiet and be a doormat. Scapegoats are generational curse breakers. Scapegoats break the cycle of abuse in dysfunctional families. That is what it means to be the bigger person. Not a doormat, or one to take abuse in silence. Scapegoats rise from punching bags to generational curse breakers. Website⁠⁠

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I've been asked many times, how do we love ourselves? What does self love feel like? I went through a very long and hard journey, a lot of self reflection and deep questioning. And I want to tell you that you don't have to re-tramatize yourself over and over or go through the same abuse from different people again and again. You don't have to beat yourself up or re-live past trauma in order to understand what you went through. However, you still have to revisit your past to acknowledge it, feel it, learn not to judge it, and then let it go. Otherwise, trauma will stay stuck in your body and history will repeat itself. You will be stuck in the same cycle of abuse. Same scenario, only different people. Abuse lives in a toxic environment. Even if you cut the tumour out, the environment will create new tumours. It's extremely hard to learn to love yourself in a toxic environment. So you have to change your environment in the physical world as well as internally and spiritually. You can leave a toxic environment and create a new life for yourself in an instant if you have a genuine desire to, the determination and courage to see it through. You will lose friends and family who do not want the dynamic to change, who want the same familiar patterns of behaviour no matter how toxic and limiting. They want you to stay in the role they are most comfortable with. Your evolution and personal growth will unsettle them. It will trigger them by shedding light on their demons. It will stir up their fears, insecurities, and make them even more resistant to change. You are doing nothing wrong. It is not selfish or arrogant. Stay true to your path, honour your growth. Be proud of your own authenticity. It's a lonely journey, do not give up, because there is much to gain by losing. Music: Aesthetics Musician: SoulProdMusic URL: https://pixabay.com/music/-aesthetics...

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Have you been gaslighted and manipulated to confusion? Do you have contradictory thoughts about who you are? Do you struggle with decision making and knowing what you want? Do you fee guilty for being happy? Are there always voices in your head ridiculing you and condemning every move you make? Website If you'd like to support my channel Letters to my goddaughter Stop all that now. Here's how to end self doubt. Make decisions with confidence. With no self doubt. Be confident in every choice you take, every decision you make. Self doubt is put into you by others. Self doubt is the voice of others. It is not your own voice. Yours is the voice of your soul which never doubts you. It loves you and is always guiding you. Music: Aesthetics Musician: SoulProdMusic URL: https://pixabay.com/music/-aesthetics...

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Covert narcissism, narcissistic abuse and scapegoating are under-researched. Many therapists, psychologists and mental health clinicians don't know much about covert narcissism and scapegoat abuse. As a result they re-traumatize the client over and over. They do not understand the insidious nature of scapegoat abuse, especially from a covert narcissist. Scapegoating can happen in any dysfunctional family, not only in narcissistic families. If you suspect you're a scapegoat suffering narcissistic abuse or abuse from a dysfunctional family, here are some tips to help you choose the right therapist or mental health clinician. Do not fall into the trap of unethical therapists or therapists that are not experts at narcissistic and scapegoat abuse.

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Beware of scams. Meditation is simple. Meditation is about clarity of mind. It's about clearing past baggage and thoughts of the future so we can receive messages from our higher self. Here I give you a 2-step tutorial on how to do it. When we don't complicate the concept of meditation, and when we don't put gurus and spiritual "experts" on the pedestal, simple meditation clears your mind so you have a direct connection to your Higher Self. When your mind is clear, all the answers will come to you. When all the answers come to you, you can manifest easily. Website To support my channel Letters to my goddaughter

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When you love someone, nothing you do for them feels like a sacrifice. Sacrifice is one of the most barren, self-pitying and self-aggrandising words. And when said, it puts a huge burden on the other person, and guilt-trips them. Plus, it makes the person saying it sound like a dumbass. A sacrifice is when you’re forced to sit on top of your husband’s funeral pyre so his soul can be cleansed. Jesus sacrificed his life so our sins can be erased. Whatever you’re doing for someone else, enjoy the fact that you’re making them happy. Don’t think of it as a sacrifice. Unless what makes the person happy is to harm you, in which case, don’t try to enjoy it. Walk away and show them the middle finger instead. Do everything with delight. Know that whatever is there for you, is for you to enjoy, without being guilt tripped that someone made a sacrifice for you.

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You’ve suffered for most of your life as a scapegoat. You stuck with them, you were loyal, you tried so hard to help them, tried so hard to have a healthy relationship with them. Tried so hard to protect them from each other. Don’t you deserve at least some financial compensation?

Some considerations of staying in a toxic and dysfunctional family versus leaving for good: If you stay because you deserve your share of the pie, you’ll have to play their dysfunctional game. You’ll have to outsmart the dysfunctional people. Can you? Are you willing to invest more time and energy into this toxic dysfunction? Are you strong enough to play a game on their turf, by their rules?

The flying monkeys and enablers are on the side of the abusers. They are following the money. They will never support you. If you leave, you have to be extremely focused on your healing, on those who do love you, focus on raising your spiritual vibration to an even higher level. So that you can shift your reality to a better one. So you can attract better people and life circumstances. Either scenario is possible, but both are difficult. Which would you choose? If you’ve tried your best, and they continue to ostracize you, don’t see it as losing something, see it as the universe pushing you out of a morally bankrupt environment. Scapegoats have two choices - die or fly. Is the possibility of losing your inheritance worth your mental, spiritual and physical health? Music: Aesthetics Musician: SoulProdMusic URL: https://pixabay.com/music/-aesthetics-138637/ #inheritance #scapegoat #flyingmonkeys #narcissisticgaslighting #narcissisticenablers #enablers #dysfunctionalfamily #spiritualawakening #blacksheep #emotionalabuse #mentalhealth #mentalwellness #scapegoatrecovery #recovery #recoveryjourney #spiritualjourney #selfrespect #selfrespectvideo