Episodes

  • How Boundaries Break the Cycle of Control

    How Boundaries Break the Cycle of Control
    Oct 25 2026
    [iframe style="border:none" src="//html5-player.libsyn.com/embed/episode/id/43392894/height/100/width//thumbnail/no/render-playlist/no/theme/custom/tdest_id/5280105/custom-color/87A93A" height="100" width="100%" scrolling="no" allowfullscreen webkitallowfullscreen mozallowfullscreen oallowfullscreen msallowfullscreen] First aired 10/25/2026 Rev. Jocelyn Jones spent a decade leading a church youth nonprofit before a "holy discontent" pushed her to build a ministry beyond the four walls of the church. What began as a weekly blog about how God helps people heal from trauma grew into a national Christian trauma healing ministry, and eventually a coaching practice for women who want to turn their calling into a sustainable business. But behind the scenes, Jocelyn was carrying wounds of her own. She opens up about running from sexual trauma by pouring herself into ministry work, and about finding herself in an abusive marriage while helping others heal. Dana and Jocelyn talk about how to know when God is calling you somewhere new, how to recognize abuse that isn't physical, why boundaries threaten people who seek control, and why faith-driven women need to charge their worth. Watch this episode [https://youtu.be/B7PxWjyL1Kc] In this episode How to recognize "holy discontent" and three questions to help you discern your callingWhy you can have Jesus and a therapist, and how faith and mental health work togetherThe many forms of abuse (spiritual, emotional, financial and more) and why talking discreetly to someone trained is a safe first stepHow boundaries protect you, and Dana's yard analogy for knowing what is and isn't yours to carryMinistry and money: building a sustainable kingdom business without giving everything away for free Timestamps (00:40) Welcome and guest intro: meet Rev. Jocelyn Jones, speaker, two-time best-selling author and Christian business coach(02:06) From church youth center director to building ministry beyond the walls of the church(03:07) How a blog, Faith Fridays and Zoom trauma healing groups grew into a national ministry(06:52) Holy discontent: three questions to discern whether God is calling you somewhere new(10:58) Running from trauma through ministry, and why you can have Jesus and a therapist(13:13) Helping others heal while living in an abusive marriage(17:58) Recognizing abuse that isn't physical, and why to talk to someone trained(23:17) Saying no, backing down and the signs of emotional abuse(27:15) Dana's yard analogy for understanding boundaries(30:03) Why couples counseling can be risky in abusive relationships(31:48) Ministry and money: building a sustainable kingdom business(33:38) Why women need to charge their worth(36:45) Where to find Rev. Jocelyn Jones, her books and her free Ministry Launch Starter Kit About Rev. Jocelyn Jones Rev. Jocelyn Jones is a speaker, two-time best-selling author and Christian business coach who helps purpose-driven women turn their calling into sustainable, impactful businesses. She holds a master's in social work and a master's in theology, and is the founder of Faith on the Journey, a Christian trauma healing ministry offering Christ-centered healing groups, church retreats and resources. Drawing on her own story as a survivor of sexual trauma and domestic violence, she speaks boldly about healing, faith and the truth that abuse is not God. Connect with Rev. Jocelyn on Instagram or LinkedIn, or visit RevJocelyn.com. Her books, Sister, Start Your Ministry and Breaking the Power of the Mask, are available at [where to buy], and women ready to build a ministry beyond the walls of the church can grab her free Ministry Launch Starter Kit on her website. Favorite quotes "You can have Jesus and a therapist." —Rev. Jocelyn Jones "Abuse is not God." —Rev. Jocelyn Jones "Charge your worth, charge your value." —Rev. Jocelyn Jones Resources mentioned Sister, Start Your Ministry by Rev. Jocelyn JonesBreaking the Power of the Mask by Rev. Jocelyn JonesFree Ministry Launch Starter Kit: at RevJocelyn.comNational Domestic Violence Hotline: call 1-800-799-7233 or text START to 88788Rev. Jocelyn Jones on Instagram: @REVJOCELYNRev. Jocelyn Jones on LinkedIn: Subscribe & connect If this episode gave you something to sit with, follow Phoenix and Flame so you never miss an episode: all apps in one place, or jump straight to Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Amazon Music, or YouTube. And if it moved you, leave a review; it's the easiest way to help another listener find the show. Learn more about Phoenix and Flame, connect with Dana, and listen to more episodes here. Ready to find your own voice on stage? Dana's a big fan of Mic Drop Academy, a public speaking and group coaching program built for women. Watch the free webinar, join a workshop, or dive into the bootcamp to build the confidence to speak up and be heard. (These are affiliate links — Dana may earn a commission at no extra cost to you.) Read the full transcript Dana Skaggs (00:40) Welcome ...
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    39 mins
  • Why HR Needs a Seat at the Table

    Why HR Needs a Seat at the Table
    Oct 18 2026
    First aired 10/18/2026 You've spoken up. You've set the boundary. Two years later, nothing has changed. For a lot of high performers, that's the moment burnout sets in and they quietly check out. In this episode, Dana sits down with Timothy Ernst, an HR and organizational development leader with more than three decades of experience in manufacturing and construction, to ask what really has to change when saying the words isn't enough. Tim got into HR "backwards," moving from broadcast journalism into organizational development, and he has spent his career learning the work from the assembly line to the construction site. Together, they talk about why HR needs a seat at the table, the difference between listening and truly hearing, why turnover is the clearest measure of culture, what to do when your company has no HR department, and why AI is a tool, not a replacement for people. Watch this episode https://youtu.be/Vlkctg2-GaI In this episode Why HR earns its seat at the table by understanding operations and the P&L, and how to move from tactical to strategicThe difference between a manager who listens and a leader who truly hears, and why humility and owning mistakes build trustWhy turnover, especially among your high-potential employees, is the clearest measure of your culture, and how quiet quitting beginsWhat to do when you've spoken up and nothing changes, including when there is no HR departmentWhy AI is a powerful tool but people still have to execute, and the five connected systems behind a healthy culture Timestamps (00:01) Welcome and guest intro: meet Timothy Ernst, an HR and organizational development leader with 30+ years of experience(02:58) Getting into HR "backwards": from broadcast journalism to organizational development(04:55) Lessons from Whirlpool and a "PhD level education in human emotion"(06:20) Why HR needs a seat at the table: learning the business and the P&L(07:57) How HR is viewed and the pain points of working in HR(09:04) Tactical vs. strategic HR, and creating a safe space to talk(10:26) Keeping veteran knowledge in-house by leveraging experienced leaders for their minds(12:48) You've spoken up for two years and nothing has changed: now what?(14:54) Listening vs. hearing, and why leaders need humility(16:51) Daily management systems: what happens when nobody's watching(18:18) Leading virtual teams and building trust through intentional check-ins(19:53) Belonging, burnout, and quiet quitting(21:21) Turnover and high-potential employees as a measure of culture(21:46) "Do more with less," overwhelm, and the cost of burnout(23:59) What leaders and HR can do: play to strengths and give stretch assignments(26:56) No HR department? Ask your manager: can you take a risk?(28:01) Dana's "yards" model of boundaries(29:27) How AI will impact the workplace: a tool, not a replacement(32:03) Authenticity in an AI-assisted world(33:14) Keeping your own voice, and Tim's book Systems Over Slogans(35:17) Where to find Timothy Ernst and his books(37:53) Why his book is different: communication, conflict, and five connected systems About Timothy Ernst Timothy Ernst is an HR, organizational development, and leadership development professional with more than three decades of experience at the intersection of people, operations, and business strategy. He began in broadcast journalism, found his way into organizational development at Western Kentucky University, and went on to work at Whirlpool and in the construction industry, where he made a point of working alongside crews to see the job through their eyes. He is writing two books: Systems Over Slogans: How Leaders Build Cultures That Perform, Adapt, and Endure, and a second on leveraging HR as a strategic partner. Connect with Timothy on LinkedIn and follow him there for updates on his books. Favorite quotes "There is a very big difference between listening and hearing." —Timothy Ernst "They've quit on the job, they just forgot to tell you." —Timothy Ernst "You're never going to know that until you take that risk and ask the question." —Timothy Ernst Resources mentioned Systems Over Slogans: How Leaders Build Cultures That Perform, Adapt, and Endure by Timothy Ernst: follow Timothy on LinkedIn for release updatesTimothy's second book on HR as a strategic partner: currently in progressTimothy Ernst on LinkedIn Subscribe & connect If this episode gave you something to sit with, follow Phoenix and Flame so you never miss an episode: all apps in one place, or jump straight to Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Amazon Music, or YouTube. And if it moved you, leave a review; it's the easiest way to help another listener find the show. Learn more about Phoenix and Flame, connect with Dana, and listen to more episodes here. Ready to find your own voice on stage? Dana's a big fan of Mic Drop Academy, a public speaking and group coaching program built for women. Watch the free webinar, join a workshop, or dive into the bootcamp to build the confidence to ...
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    42 mins
  • Why Men Refuse to Admit They're Struggling

    Why Men Refuse to Admit They're Struggling
    Sep 27 2026
    First aired September 6, 2026 Dennis Bairos oversees more than 29 fitness locations across Texas, and somewhere between the grand openings and the late-night emails, he noticed a pattern: he was the guy who'd rather miss a flight than admit he needed help, the coach whose sideline energy made his own wife ask if he was okay, and the traveler who'd rather squeeze in one more phone call than let 20 free minutes in a rental car go to waste. That pattern became his book, Wired Like This: Why Men Push Too Far and Still Say, I Got It!, a look at the small, everyday decisions at home, at work, and on the sideline of a kid's game that shape how men actually behave, often without them noticing. We talk about why "I got it" might be the most dangerous phrase a man can say, the difference between healthy work ethic and ego-driven burnout, why men go all-in on a hobby and then abandon it completely, and how his wife became the one voice who could see what he couldn't. Watch this episode https://youtu.be/sRsXcIgmVAo In this episode Why "I got it" might be the most dangerous phrase men say, and the ego hiding underneath itHow Dennis's competitive, all-or-nothing wiring showed up coaching his kids' T-ball team, and the moment his wife had to tell him he'd gone overboardThe real story behind missing a flight because he couldn't stop multitasking, even for a 20-minute drive to the airportWhy work ethic can be a genuine skill and a trap at the same time, and how to tell the difference before it becomes burnoutWhat's actually happening when a man goes all-in on a hobby, buys all the gear, and then drops it completely a year laterHow framing "asking for help" as the next level of leadership, instead of a weakness, changes the way teams operateWhy a leader's pace becomes part of their identity, and the hidden cost that pace puts on everyone who reports to them Timestamps (00:01) Welcome and guest intro: meet Dennis Bairos, author of Wired Like This(00:57) His background in high-growth fitness leadership, and how that pace carried over to parenting(03:51) "Stop half-assing it": the moment Dana's own son called out her push, push, push mentality(05:54) Is "I got it" a male trait, or does Dana see it in women too?(08:38) The fear of slowing down: work ethic, ego, and the competition to be first in, last out(12:06) The missed flight: a real-time example of multitasking costing more than it saves(14:55) Why "I got it" might be the most dangerous thing men say(18:25) Reframing asking for help as the next level of leadership, not a weakness(22:13) What his wife saw in his coaching that he couldn't see in himself(24:52) The T-ball season that revealed his coaching had gone overboard(27:13) Why men go all-in on a hobby, then drop it completely(33:22) The airport conversation that changed how he leads: why a leader's pace becomes their identity(36:53) Where to find Dennis, his book, and his Instagram About Dennis Bairos Dennis Bairos is the author of Wired Like This: Why Men Push Too Far and Still Say, I Got It! A husband and father of three, he oversees more than 29 fitness locations across Texas as a senior leader in high-growth, high-volume organizations. He writes about the small, everyday decisions at home, at work, and on the sideline of a kid's game that shape how men actually behave. Connect with Dennis on Instagram or LinkedIn. His book, Wired Like This, is available exclusively on Amazon. Favorite quotes "I got it" might be the most dangerous thing men say. —Dennis Bairos "When your pace becomes your identity, the people who follow you don't just see the results — they see the costs." —Dennis Bairos "You will be more successful, and looked at as someone that's admired a little bit more, because you took that extra step and showed courage to ask for help." —Dennis Bairos Resources mentioned Wired Like This: Why Men Push Too Far and Still Say, I Got It!: Dennis's book, available exclusively on AmazonDennis on Instagram: @keep.the.edgeDennis Bairos on LinkedIn Subscribe & connect If this episode gave you something to sit with, follow Phoenix and Flame so you never miss an episode: all apps in one place, or jump straight to Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Amazon Music, or YouTube. And if it moved you, leave a review; it's the easiest way to help another listener find the show. Learn more about Phoenix and Flame, connect with Dana, and listen to more episodes here. Ready to find your own voice on stage? Dana's a big fan of Mic Drop Academy, a public speaking and group coaching program built for women. Watch the free webinar, join a workshop, or dive into the bootcamp to build the confidence to speak up and be heard. (These are affiliate links — Dana may earn a commission at no extra cost to you.) Read the full transcript [Dana] (00:01) Welcome, friends. Whether you're out on a walk, running errands, or relaxing at home, it's wonderful to connect with you. Joining us today is Dennis Bairos. Dennis is the author of Wired Like ...
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    40 mins
  • Why Your Nervous System Won't Let You Rest

    Why Your Nervous System Won't Let You Rest
    Sep 6 2026
    First aired September 6, 2026 Dr. Charleanea Arellano has spent over 30 years as a clinical psychologist and leadership coach, but the framework she's best known for now, the Embodied Narrative Framework, didn't come from a textbook. It came from putting away laundry five years ago and noticing her own body bracing for impact, for no reason at all, at age 55, after decades of actually being safe. Dr. Arellano built her career studying how high-achieving women lead while carrying nervous systems shaped by trauma, and by the added weight of managing how their race, sexuality, or gender is perceived in the room. As a queer Latina psychologist who didn't come out publicly until 2024, and who spent years often being the only person of color at the table, she's lived the pattern she now helps her clients unwind. We talk about what a chronically activated nervous system actually feels like in the body, the subtle and not-so-subtle ways bias shows up in a room, why "just get a massage" isn't a real fix for high achievers, and the simple, several-times-a-day nervous system reset she teaches instead. Watch this epsiode on Youtube | Subscribe In this episode Why Dr. Arellano's own healing journey, not her doctorate, is what actually led her to the nervous system work she's known for todayWhat it felt like to be the only person of color in the room for decades, and the subtle versus overt ways bias and microaggressions actually show upHow to tell when your nervous system is activated, from bracing for impact to chronic anxiety, and why it starts in the body, not the mindThe physical toll of years of unresolved activation: TMJ, chronic headaches, fatigue, digestive issues, and moreWhy women and men are socialized to handle stress so differently, and what that means for high-achieving women specificallyThe several-times-a-day nervous system reset Dr. Arellano teaches her clients, and why it only takes secondsBalancing connection and protection with family members who caused real harm, and what it looks like to set a boundary without needing them to understand it Timestamps (00:01) Welcome and guest intro: meet psychologist and Embodied Narrative Framework founder Dr. Charleanea Arellano(03:07) Her path into psychology: curiosity about human behavior, a high school class, and a PhD by 29(05:26) "We are a version of our perfect client": how her own experience as a high achiever managing perceptions shaped her work(07:52) The subtle and overt ways bias shows up in a room, from stopped conversations to backhanded compliments(11:49) Stepping away from the professional world in 2003 after years of navigating belonging and credibility(13:24) What it actually feels like when your nervous system is activated: bracing, anxiety, and the body's fight-or-run response(20:35) The chronic physical toll: TMJ, headaches, fatigue, digestive issues, and chronic pain(24:30) Why women carry stress differently than men, and what that means for high-achieving women(25:57) The several-times-a-day nervous system reset, and why "just get a massage" doesn't work for high achievers(33:36) Her books: the memoir Terrible Gifts and The Last Dance, on intergenerational trauma with her father(37:01) Balancing connection and protection: boundaries with family members who caused real harm(40:06) Where to find Dr. Arellano and her work About Dr. Charleanea Arellano Dr. Charleanea Arellano is a licensed psychologist and Board Certified Life Coach with over 30 years of clinical and leadership experience, and the founder of the Embodied Narrative Framework. A queer Latina psychologist, she helps high-achieving women understand how nervous system patterns, trauma-adapted achievement, and the added stress of managing how their race, sexuality, or gender is perceived shape the way they decide, lead, and relate to success. Her own healing journey, including decades of navigating rooms where she was often the only person of color, informs her work today. She's the author of the forthcoming memoir Terrible Gifts: Finding the Light in the Darkest of Places, and The Last Dance, which explores intergenerational trauma through her relationship with her father. Learn more at Dr. Charleanea's website, or connect with her on LinkedIn. Favorite quotes "We are a version of our perfect client." —Dr. Charleanea Arellano "It starts with the nervous system. The nervous system is online before we have any conscious thought about it. It's running the show." —Dr. Charleanea Arellano "This is hygiene. This is another form of hygiene — nervous system hygiene that you do throughout the day." —Dr. Charleanea Arellano, on why a 30-second reset matters as much as brushing your teeth Resources mentioned Dr. Charleanea's website: home to her coaching practice and more on the Embodied Narrative FrameworkTerrible Gifts: Finding the Light in the Darkest of Places: Dr. Arellano's forthcoming memoir, currently in the publication processThe Last Dance: her book on ...
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    44 mins
  • Why Business Leaders Need Negotiation Skills

    Why Business Leaders Need Negotiation Skills
    Aug 23 2026
    First aired August 23, 2026 Annette Mullin spent 24 years with the Las Vegas Metropolitan Police Department, nine of them as a crisis negotiator, eventually leading one of the busiest negotiation teams in the country â€" averaging over 100 call-outs a year. She worked patrol, sexual assault, internal affairs, and homicide, becoming LVMPD's first female homicide sergeant, before spending her final years as the department's director of employee wellness in the aftermath of the October 1 Mandalay Bay shooting, the largest mass shooting in U.S. history. Now a negotiation instructor and coach at the Black Swan Group, founded by former FBI lead hostage negotiator Chris Voss, Annette translates those high-stakes lessons into practical tools for leaders, teams, and individuals navigating pressure, conflict, and growth. We talk about the universal need she discovered in every person she ever negotiated with, why the crime itself is almost always a secondary issue, what "tactical empathy" actually looks like in practice, and why most of us were never actually taught how to listen. Watch this episode Youtube episode link here In this episode How the O.J. Simpson case and a criminalistics program in LA sparked Annette's path into crime scene investigation, and why she chose Las Vegas over LAPDJoining LVMPD's crisis negotiation team, and what made Las Vegas's team one of the busiest in the countryBecoming LVMPD's first female homicide sergeant, and the advice that helped her navigate a male-dominated field without making it about genderWhy removing assumptions, and getting curious instead of judgmental, changed how she worked with people in crisisThe universal need Annette discovered every person in crisis shares, no matter how different the circumstancesWhy the crime itself is almost always a secondary issue, and what's usually driving it underneathHow Chris Voss's "tactical empathy" model, from Never Split the Difference, turns negotiation into collaboration instead of a tug-of-warThe five levels of listening Black Swan teaches, and why most of us are trained to listen to respond instead of to understand Timestamps (00:01) Welcome and guest intro: meet retired LVMPD crisis negotiator Annette Mullin(02:23) From the East Coast to Las Vegas: the O.J. Simpson case and her path into crime scene investigation(04:42) Joining the crisis negotiation team, and Las Vegas's brutal call-out numbers(06:36) Retiring after serving as director of employee wellness following the October 1 Mandalay Bay shooting(08:15) What drew her to law enforcement as a kid, from Nancy Drew to Quincy, M.E.(10:10) Navigating gender in a male-dominated field, and becoming LVMPD's first female homicide sergeant(14:00) Removing assumptions: why curiosity beats judgment when someone has "a chip on their shoulder"(16:52) The universal need every person in crisis shares, and why that surprised her most(20:05) Why the crime is almost always the secondary issue(24:28) From hostage negotiation to the boardroom: Chris Voss, Black Swan Group, and tactical empathy(28:43) The biggest obstacle to listening, and the five levels of listening Black Swan teaches(31:50) The number one struggle business leaders bring to her, and why practicing in "low stakes" moments matters(34:12) Where to find Annette, Black Swan Group, and the new book Fight Less, Win More About Annette Mullin Annette Mullin is a retired Las Vegas Metropolitan Police Department leader with 24 years of law enforcement experience, including nine years as a crisis negotiator and eventual leader of LVMPD's crisis negotiation team, one of the busiest in the country. Over her career she worked patrol, community policing, sexual assault, internal affairs, and homicide, becoming LVMPD's first female homicide sergeant, before serving as the department's director of employee wellness in the aftermath of the October 1 Mandalay Bay shooting. Now a negotiation instructor and coach at the Black Swan Group, founded by former FBI lead hostage negotiator Chris Voss, Annette teaches the principles behind Never Split the Difference, including tactical empathy, to leaders, teams, and individuals navigating pressure and conflict in business and life. Learn more at the Black Swan Group, or connect with Annette on LinkedIn. Favorite quotes "There is a universal need for every person to be heard, to be seen, and to be understood." "Not everybody is like you. Removing assumptions was really key, let them show you or tell you." "If I read a book about working out every week but never lift a weight, I can't expect to see anything different." Resources mentioned Black Swan Group: negotiation training founded by former FBI lead hostage negotiator Chris VossNever Split the Difference by Chris Voss: the book that brings hostage-negotiation principles like tactical empathy into business and everyday lifeFight Less, Win More: Chris Voss's newest book, adapting those same skills for personal relationshipsAnnette ...
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    37 mins
  • Why Comedy Might Be the Best Medicine For Mental Health

    Why Comedy Might Be the Best Medicine For Mental Health
    Aug 16 2026
    First aired August 16, 2026 For over a decade, Dave Mowry couldn't get out of bed, couldn't shower, and couldn't walk to his own mailbox without waiting until dark so a neighbor wouldn't catch the look in his eyes. In 1994, a psychotic break sent the successful businessman and family man into a depression so deep it cost him his house, his career, and 14 years he calls his "lost years." He slept in his clothes for months at a time. At parties, he'd stand against the wall and pray no one came over to talk to him. Then, at his wife's urging, he walked into a stand-up comedy class for people living with mental illness, and by the second session, something shifted: he started looking for the joke inside the pain. Dave is now a bestselling author, a blogger with over a million reads, a peer support specialist, and, in his own words, "a comic who shatters stigma one joke at a time." We get into what clinical depression actually feels like from the inside, why his wife is the true hero of his story, how a ten-week comedy class became group therapy in disguise, the gentle suicide joke that helped save a young man's life, and why people in the mental health field need to stop trying to "protect" the very people they're meant to be supporting. Watch this episode In this episode Why a 1994 psychotic break sent a successful businessman into 14 "lost years" of homelessness and depressionWhat clinical depression actually feels like: the showers he couldn't take, the mailbox trips timed for after dark, and the panic attacks that came out of nowhereWhy "just do something small," like sitting in a different chair, was enough to keep Dave from getting stuck in hopelessnessWhat family members need to understand about mental illness, and how Dave's wife became "the hero of his story"How a NAMI stand-up comedy class turned Dave's pain into laugh-out-loud jokes, and eventually a sold-out show at Helium Comedy ClubDave's gentle suicide joke, why it works, and the night it helped save a young man's lifeWhy people in the helping professions need to stop trying to "save" people with mental illness and start supporting them instead Timestamps (00:01) Welcome and guest intro: meet comic and mental health advocate Dave Mowry(01:16) The 1994 psychotic break, and the 14 "lost years" that followed(03:56) What clinical depression actually feels like: showers, blending into the wall, panic attacks(07:10) The exhausting weight of "just getting out of bed"(08:41) Don't get stuck: the small, deliberate choices that kept hope alive(10:15) What family members need to understand: it's not a moral failing(11:26) Dave's wife, the true hero of his story(14:34) Finding NAMI's stand-up comedy class, and the moment humor clicked(17:59) Selling out Helium Comedy Club, and becoming "a thing"(19:51) Blogging, "OMG, that's me," and shattering stigma one joke at a time(25:32) Teaching comedy: the setup, the punchline, and getting students to open up(26:10) Dave's gentle suicide joke, and the night it helped save a life(32:42) Boundaries, mania, and giving himself permission to say no(37:25) Where to find Dave, his books, and how to reach him About Dave Mowry Dave Mowry is a bestselling author, blogger, and stand-up comic who shatters stigma one joke at a time. After a 1994 psychotic break led to 14 "lost years" of severe depression, homelessness, and hospitalization, Dave found his way back through NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) and a stand-up comedy class for people living with mental illness. He went on to sell out Portland's Helium Comedy Club, teach comedy classes to people living with mental illness, and become a peer support specialist. He's the author of OMG, That's Me! and Healing with Humor, and his blog for bphope.com has been read over a million times. Learn more and get in touch at Dave's website, or reach him directly at davemowry2@gmail.com. Favorite quotes "It's not a moral failing. It's a medical condition." —Dave Mowry "Afterwards, I called my wife for help. She said, 'There are more pills under the sink.'" —Dave Mowry, on the gentle suicide joke that's helped save lives "We don't need to be saved. Support us and all that, but don't try to save us. We don't need it." —Dave Mowry Resources mentioned Dave's website: home to his books and a contact formOMG, That's Me!: Dave's bestselling book on what it's really like to live with a mental illness, available on Amazon and KindleHealing with Humor: Dave's newest book, telling the story of six comedy-class students and their transformationNAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness): the organization that connected Dave to the comedy class that changed his lifeHelium Comedy Club (Portland): where Dave's class sold out a 185-seat show Subscribe & connect If this episode gave you something to sit with,
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    41 mins
  • Why Imposter Syndrome Keeps Leaders Stuck

    Why Imposter Syndrome Keeps Leaders Stuck
    Aug 9 2026

    In this episode, Dana is joined by Kurt Bush, a trauma-informed coach who helps leaders move from imposter syndrome to authentic confidence. Kurt shares his own journey with imposter syndrome, from feeling like a fraud in corporate leadership meetings to realizing his true calling. He explains that to make a change, the pain of staying the same must become greater than the pain of changing, a threshold many of us fear crossing. Kurt introduces the ERT (Encounter + Reflection = Transformation) framework, a practical approach to help you get unstuck. He reveals why the first step to moving forward is often learning to "start stopping" the things that drain your energy, allowing you to create a life that is truly aligned with who you are.

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    35 mins
  • Your Midlife 'Crisis' Might Be Burnout (with Jody Brooks)

    Your Midlife 'Crisis' Might Be Burnout (with Jody Brooks)
    Jul 26 2026
    A midlife crisis isn't actually a crisis. That's the challenge Jody Brooks puts to anyone who's ever felt lost, restless, or quietly convinced something's wrong with them somewhere around 40 or 50: what looks like burnout, and what people love to write off as a freakout, is more often a calling. His own arrived at lunchtime at the office, buzzing canteen and all, when he found himself sitting in a restroom cubicle, crying so hard he could barely breathe. No brutal meeting that morning. No disaster. Just the quiet moment his body picked to file its formal complaint: burnout wasn't a "rough patch" anymore, it was a full-body shutdown. I've been a therapist for 18 years, and I can tell you: high performers do this. We white-knuckle through "one more day" (and one more, and one more) until the body stops asking politely. Sound familiar? Jody is a UK-based midlife and burnout coach who once survived 52 flights in eight months of what he calls "jazz hands" performing, and his calling-not-crisis framework is asking you to come home to yourself. We get into how to spot the full-body warning signs before you hit your own cubicle moment, how to settle anxiety in the moment it spikes (not three weeks and one forced sabbatical later), and Jody's wonderfully backwards first step for anyone feeling stuck: don't start something new. Start stopping. Watch this episode on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qfi9lec7n2o In this episode Why burnout can feel like "just a bad day" until it suddenly isn't, and how to recognize the full-body warning signs before you hit the wallWhy a midlife crisis isn't really a crisis at all: it's a calling to reconnect with who you actually areThe anxiety-regulation technique Jody uses with coaching clients to come back from a stress spiral in real timeWhy you can't be "out of alignment" until you know what alignment actually means, and how to find your starting pointThe "start stopping" exercise for anyone who wants change but doesn't know where to beginHow understanding your core values turns boundaries from something scary into something guilt-free Timestamps (00:01) Welcome and guest intro: meet midlife and burnout coach Jody Brooks(01:47) The restroom-cubicle "pile of ash" moment: burnout as a full-body shutdown(04:34) The three-hour drive home, and the decision to stop(06:43) Fear, anxiety, and the "one small thing" that finally breaks us(10:10) Jody's technique for regulating anxiety and stress in the moment(13:59) What alignment really means (and the bus analogy)(19:39) Why younger generations and midlifers experience burnout differently(24:37) The blank-page moment: reclaiming your story through empowerment(25:43) "Start stopping": Jody's first step for anyone feeling stuck(29:21) Boundaries, core values, and why saying no is an act of service(33:17) Where to find Jody and his free resources About Jody Brooks Jody Brooks is a UK-based midlife and burnout coach and the founder of Authentic Coaching. After burning out during a high-pressure international career in education (one stretch included 52 flights in eight months) he developed the nine principles of authentic living, a practical framework that helps people turn crisis into connection and sustainable well-being. Learn more and join his free community at Jody's website, or connect with him on LinkedIn. Favorite quotes "I actually can't go back." —Jody Brooks, on the moment burnout finally broke through "Start stopping. Stopping what no longer serves you." —Jody Brooks "If you don't know where you're going, any road will take you there." —Jody Brooks Resources mentioned AuthenticCoaching.me: Jody's website and free community, home to the "Start Stopping" exercise and the anxiety-regulation technique he mentions on the showJody's nine principles of authentic living (his coaching framework, discussed throughout the episode)Jody Brooks on LinkedIn Subscribe & connect If this episode gave you something to sit with, follow Phoenix and Flame so you never miss an episode: all apps in one place, or jump straight to Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Amazon Music, or YouTube. And if it moved you, leave a review; it's the easiest way to help another listener find the show. Learn more about Phoenix and Flame, connect with Dana, and listen to more episodes here. Curious where your own boundaries stand? Take my free Work Boundaries Quiz: danaskaggs.com/quiz
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    37 mins