This episode is also available as a blog post: http://pamelakaranova.com/2023/03/15/various-new-articles-are-featured-on-my-substack-the-real-adoptea-moxieMany of you are already aware that I am now writing on my new Substack platform – The Real Adoptea Moxie! I am having a blast and I would love to invite you to join me!

While some of you have been following my website for a very long time, I will be sure to visit from time to time to share snippets of some of the articles I am writing on my Substack platform.

For over a decade now, I’ve witnessed some very significant walls that are in place between individuals in the adoption constellation that have blocked the truth from coming to light.

My new column is dedicated to breaking these walls (barriers) down so everyone in the adoption constellation has a more well-rounded perspective on how it feels to be adopted from the adult adoptee’s perspective.

After spending over a decade in adoptee spaces, I’ve been able to gain valuable insight from healing in my own personal journey but also walking with my fellow adoptees out of the darkness into the light when it comes to our experiences being adopted.

My new Substack Newsletter “The Real Adoptea Moxie” recently launched. I’m opening my “Ask Me Anything” Column to answer questions from anyone who would like more insight into the adoptee experience. Maybe you are married to an adoptee or an adoptive parent seeking clarity or suggestions? Maybe you are an adoptee dealing with a significant struggle? Maybe your best friend is an adoptee?

This episode is also available as a blog post: http://pamelakaranova.com/2023/02/16/ask-me-anything-column-on-substack-at-the-real-adoptea-moxie-by-pamela-a-karanova/

Bold | Courageous | Fierce | Writer | Unruly Adoptee | Truth Seeker | Uncensored

Adoptea – Dishing out authentic, bonafide adoptee realitea one click, article, comment, and post at a time, adding uncensored and unfiltered rants and raves with an occasional impromptu cup of hot tea & virtual chat time with fellow adoptees & subscribers.

Moxie – Moxie describes someone with a fighting spirit. If you’ve got moxie, you’ve got confidence, grit, determination, and nerve. If you’ve got moxie, you have a growth mindset, which means you can’t be stopped by an emotional response to a challenging situation and, ultimately, not by anything. Moxie is a word that means: strength of character. It means courage and spunk.

This episode is also available as a blog post: http://pamelakaranova.com/2023/01/23/the-real-adoptea-moxie-by-pamela-a-karanova-is-now-on-substack/

For years now, I have had strained or missing relationships with all of my parents on paper and my biological parents. But, in the last twelve years, they have all passed away one by one—four people with whom I had four unusual or missing relationships.

Two of them passed away in the last six months.

As a result, my obsession with trolling for obituaries on Google has concluded. I won’t miss it because, like closed adoption, it’s torture and agonizing.

How would you feel if the only way you might learn of your parent’s or family members passing was by conducting Google searches weekly or sometimes daily looking for obituaries? What if this went on for years or even a lifetime?

How many of my fellow adoptees have found themselves doing this?

How does it make you feel?

This episode is also available as a blog post: http://pamelakaranova.com/2023/01/09/the-essence-of-my-biological-parents-and-my-adoptive-parents-being-deceased-an-adoptees-perspective/

I genuinely believe the topic of newborn bonding isn’t brought to light enough in the adoption arena, so I decided to share my adoptee feelings about it based on my lived experience.

Just because someone adopts a child doesn’t mean the adoptee will bond or attach to the adoptive mother or father. It’s also essential to note that not all adoptive parents can form an attachment or bond with their adopted child. This is not guaranteed, yet it’s almost always dismissed as if it isn’t a real possibility.

This episode is also available as a blog post: http://pamelakaranova.com/2022/12/28/the-perplexity-of-forced-bonding-in-adoption-an-adoptees-perspective/

This website has saved me so many times from releasing my burdensome thoughts to those I am close to. Over the last decade, being able to share my big adoptee sentiments here on my website has likely saved my life many times over!

Thank you for being here and allowing me to communicate my inner adoptee thoughts and struggles. We all need a space like this, and if you are an adoptee and don’t have it, I inspire you to get it!

While 2022 is winding up, the year will soon be behind us. But, as we step into 2023, I can’t help but acknowledge all the changes and growth that’s transpired in 2022 in my personal life. So much greatness has happened that I will be eternally grateful for.

Yet, I’ve also experienced many significant things that have created a layer of sadness that I’m unsure what to do with. Holidays are challenging in general and even more so for adoptees. While everyone is arranging holiday get-togethers with family and celebrating life and the marvelous things it brings, I am drowning in my sadness.

Welcome to adoption.

This episode is also available as a blog post: http://pamelakaranova.com/2022/12/21/a-living-breathing-inconvenience-the-war-within-an-adoptees-perspective/

We’ve heard it for centuries, as early as 1967 when the Beatles released a number-one hit song, “All you need is love.” The lyrics have echoed throughout time, wildly reverberating throughout adoption communities. However, adoptive parents shine bright when it comes to wanting to offer Love to the child they hope to gain through adoption, placing it at the forefront of their motives to adopt. While they might have pure intentions, there are some layers to the adoptee experience they should consider.

What if love isn’t enough or a house full of stuff?

What if the wound from separation trauma is too big to heal?

What if they adopt a child that doesn’t bond with them?

What if the adoption agencies and advocates haven’t been honest and forthcoming about the other side of the narrative that’s almost always ignored, the feelings of an adopted child once they grow up?

What if they have been sold a lie regarding adoption, and they don’t know what they don’t know?

What if they know it, yet they have chosen to ignore it?

This episode is also available as a blog post: http://pamelakaranova.com/2022/12/20/why-love-isnt-enough-or-a-house-full-of-stuff-an-adoptees-perspective/

You have come to the right place if you are looking for the best adoption quotes from the transracial adoptee’s perspective. This article shares 100 Heartfelt Transracial Adoptee Quotes that Honor’s the Truth of Adoption from the transracial adult adoptee perspective.

As we end 2022, I decided to call my fellow adoptees to help collaborate and share quotes from the heart, reflecting the voices almost always overlooked in the adoption constellation. So, 100 transracial adoptees came together to capture some of the feelings and experiences that transracial adoptees go through during their lifetimes.

This episode is also available as a blog post: http://pamelakaranova.com/2022/11/02/concluding-adoptee-remembrance-day-october-30th-2022-but-adoptee-voices-will-continue-to-blaze/