One of the most common dynamics I see in marriage (especially between anxious and avoidant attachment styles) is the push and pull between emotional and physical intimacy. One partner needs emotional closeness before they can be physical, while the other needs physical connection before they can open up emotionally. And this cycle leaves both partners feeling unseen, frustrated, and stuck.

In this episode, I’m breaking down why this happens, what’s really going on underneath the surface, and how to start changing the pattern so you can both get your needs met. You’ll learn how attachment styles play a major role in this dynamic, why neither partner is “wrong” for what they need, and how small shifts in perspective and action can completely change your connection.

Tune in to discover:

• Why emotional and physical intimacy often feel like opposite needs

• How attachment styles shape your comfort with closeness and vulnerability

• What’s really happening when you both feel unmet and misunderstood

• The mindset shift that helps you meet each other’s needs without resentment

• How to rebuild teamwork and connection, even when it feels impossible

The Holiday Connection Challenge: https://marriedafterkids.com/holiday-connection-challege

Connect with me for a FREE Married After Kids Intervention Call:

https://marriedafterkids.satoriapp.com/offers/277730-married-after-kids-intervention-call

The Us System: https://marriedafterkids.com/the-us-system

FREE Marriage Shutdown Checklist: https://marriedafterkids.com/marriage-shutdown?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=links&utm_campaign=MSoptin

Follow me on Instagram so you don’t miss a thing! www.instagram.com/marriedafterkids

If your spouse ever seems emotionally distant, shuts down during hard moments, or “stays busy” instead of connecting, this episode will help you understand why. In this follow-up to last week’s conversation on anxious attachment, I’m diving into the five key traits of avoidant attachment and how they impact your marriage.

Whether this is your attachment style or your partner’s, understanding these patterns will completely change how you interpret their behavior and how you can respond in ways that build trust and safety instead of disconnection.

Tune in to discover:

• The core fear that drives avoidant attachment

• What’s really happening when your partner pulls away

• Why closeness can sometimes feel uncomfortable

• The link between logic, emotional shutdown, and invalidation in marriage

• How to build safety and closeness with a partner who tends to pull away

The Holiday Connection Challenge: https://marriedafterkids.com/holiday-connection-challege

Connect with me for a FREE Married After Kids Intervention Call:

https://marriedafterkids.satoriapp.com/offers/277730-married-after-kids-intervention-call

The Us System: https://marriedafterkids.com/the-us-system

FREE Marriage Shutdown Checklist: https://marriedafterkids.com/marriage-shutdown?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=links&utm_campaign=MSoptin

Follow me on Instagram so you don’t miss a thing! www.instagram.com/marriedafterkids

Attachment styles have become a big topic lately, and for good reason. They shape how we love, communicate, and respond in our relationships. In this episode, I’m diving into the five key traits of anxious attachment and how they show up in marriage, especially after kids.

If you’ve ever found yourself overthinking, craving reassurance, or feeling more impacted by emotional distance than your partner, this conversation will help you understand why. I’m sharing personal insights from my own anxious attachment style, what I’ve learned through years of research and client work, and how to begin creating more security, confidence, and peace in your relationship.

Tune in to discover:

• The core fear that drives anxious attachment and how it shows up in marriage

• Why emotional closeness can feel like safety and distance feels so threatening

• How inconsistency and uncertainty fuel anxiety and disconnection

• The link between overthinking, control, and emotional burnout

• How comparison and jealousy often stem from fear rather than fact

The Holiday Connection Challenge: https://marriedafterkids.com/holiday-connection-challege

Connect with me for a FREE Married After Kids Intervention Call:

https://marriedafterkids.satoriapp.com/offers/277730-married-after-kids-intervention-call

The Us System: https://marriedafterkids.com/the-us-system

FREE Marriage Shutdown Checklist: https://marriedafterkids.com/marriage-shutdown?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=links&utm_campaign=MSoptin

Get your FREE EBOOK! 3 Ways To Connect More With Your Spouse (In 5 Min or Less): https://marriedafterkids.com/freebie

Follow me on Instagram so you don’t miss a thing! www.instagram.com/marriedafterkids

Marriage shutdown can feel like one of the most painful and confusing places to be. You’re lonely, resentful, and unsure how to fix it, and even the good moments never seem to last. But there’s one specific part of marriage shutdown that truly scares me, and it’s something most couples don’t even realize is happening until it’s already taken hold.

In this episode, I’m breaking down what makes this stage of marriage so dangerous and what you can do to change it. I’ll share personal stories from my own marriage, the psychology behind why our brains look for someone to blame, and the key mindset shift that can help you and your spouse move from disconnection to teamwork again.

Tune in to discover:

• The hidden reason couples stay stuck in marriage shutdown

• Why focusing on your spouse’s flaws keeps you from healing the real issue

• How your brain’s “protective mechanism” can make things worse

• The dynamic I call the “shutdown spiral” and how to identify yours

• What to do instead to rebuild connection and start working as a team again

The Holiday Connection Challenge: https://marriedafterkids.com/holiday-connection-challege

The Us System: https://marriedafterkids.com/the-us-system

FREE Marriage Shutdown Checklist: https://marriedafterkids.com/marriage-shutdown?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=links&utm_campaign=MSoptin

Connect with me for a FREE Married After Kids Intervention Call:

https://marriedafterkids.satoriapp.com/offers/277730-married-after-kids-intervention-call

Follow me on Instagram so you don’t miss a thing! www.instagram.com/marriedafterkids

So many women are doing everything right, eating well, exercising, managing the mental load, and still feel off. If that’s you, this conversation will be a breath of relief.

In this episode, I’m joined by registered dietitian Dr. Heather Finley to explore how physical health and gut health play a powerful role in how we show up in our marriages. We talk about the often-overlooked ways that depletion, hormones, and stress affect your mood, connection, and ability to feel good in your body, and why finding the right answers can completely change how you relate to yourself and your partner.

If you’ve ever thought, “My labs say I’m fine, but I don’t feel fine,” this episode will help you see that you’re not crazy and that your health and happiness in marriage are deeply connected.

Tune in to discover:

• How gut and hormone health impact your energy, mood, and connection in marriage

• Why so many women feel dismissed by “normal” lab results

• The role of stress, sleep, and mineral depletion in feeling off balance

• How to start the right conversations with your partner about getting support

• Small, foundational shifts that can change how you feel in your body and your relationship

Connect with Heather:

• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drheatherfinley

• Website: https://www.guttogetherprogram.com/

• Love Your Gut Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/ca/podcast/love-your-gut/id1620578740

• Free Mineral Guide: https://nourish-functional-health.kit.com/mineralguide?utm_source=link+in+bio&utm_medium=social&utm_campaign=mineral-ig&utm_id=mineral-ig&utm_term=mineral-ig&utm_content=mineral-ig

• Mineral Testing ($30 off!): https://drheatherfinley.thrivecart.com/htma/?coupon=MARRIEDWITHKIDS

Connect with Lindsay:

• The Us System: https://marriedafterkids.com/the-us-system

• FREE Marriage Shutdown Checklist: https://marriedafterkids.com/marriage-shutdown?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=links&utm_campaign=MSoptin

• Connect with me for a FREE Married After Kids Intervention Call:

https://marriedafterkids.satoriapp.com/offers/277730-married-after-kids-intervention-call

• Follow me on Instagram so you don’t miss a thing! www.instagram.com/marriedafterkids

Cancel culture started as a way to hold people accountable, but it’s gone too far. The same mindset that demands perfection online is quietly showing up in our marriages, convincing us that if our spouse messes up, they’re toxic, unfixable, or not worth our time.

In this episode, I’m unpacking how cancel culture’s black-and-white thinking can erode the safety and trust that healthy relationships depend on. We’ll talk about the difference between real dealbreakers and normal human mistakes, why repair is so vital, and what it really takes to grow through the inevitable missteps every couple faces.

Tune in to discover:

• How cancel culture’s “no room for mistakes” mindset seeps into marriage

• Why growth, repair, and nuance matter more than getting it perfect

• How to tell the difference between toxic patterns and normal imperfection

• The role of emotional safety when you and your spouse mess up

• What to focus on to build a marriage that lasts through imperfection and repair

The Us System: https://marriedafterkids.com/the-us-system

FREE Marriage Shutdown Checklist: https://marriedafterkids.com/marriage-shutdown?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=links&utm_campaign=MSoptin

Connect with me for a FREE Married After Kids Intervention Call:

https://marriedafterkids.satoriapp.com/offers/277730-married-after-kids-intervention-call

Follow me on Instagram so you don’t miss a thing! www.instagram.com/marriedafterkids

If you’ve ever tried to talk to your spouse about the mental load and ended up feeling more frustrated than before, it’s not because you’re doing it wrong. So many couples want to share the load more fairly, but there are hidden barriers that make these conversations stall out or spiral into conflict.

In this episode, I’m breaking down the main reasons why dads often don’t step in, why moms end up carrying it all by default, and what keeps these conversations from moving forward. More importantly, I’ll walk you through how to recognize the specific barriers in your relationship so you can finally shift the dynamic and feel like a team again.

Tune in to discover:

• Why men often don’t recognize the mental load in the first place

• How default “factory settings” after kids leave moms carrying more than their share

• Why asking for help still leaves you holding the invisible weight

• The role of defensiveness in shutting conversations down

• What to focus on instead so you can break the cycle and build more equity at home

The Us System: https://marriedafterkids.com/the-us-system

FREE Marriage Shutdown Checklist: https://marriedafterkids.com/marriage-shutdown?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=links&utm_campaign=MSoptin

Connect with me for a FREE Married After Kids Intervention Call:

https://marriedafterkids.satoriapp.com/offers/277730-married-after-kids-intervention-call

Follow me on Instagram so you don’t miss a thing! www.instagram.com/marriedafterkids

Sometimes the most powerful shifts in marriage come from hearing what other couples are struggling with (and how they’re working through it). That’s why in this episode, I’m taking you behind the scenes and sharing the exact conversations I’m having with my clients right now.

These are the patterns, perspective shifts, and tools that come up over and over again, no matter what stage of marriage someone is in. From unmet needs to the mental load to feeling stuck in the same cycle, these conversations are the ones that bring the biggest breakthroughs. And today, I want you to benefit from them too.

Tune in to discover:

• Why perspective shifts are one of the most underutilized tools in marriage

• How unmet needs and resentment can keep you stuck in painful cycles

• Why “just talking about it” often isn’t the work, and what actually is

• The importance of having the right tools and systems, not just good intentions

• The top mindset shift I teach my clients that changes everything

The Us System: https://marriedafterkids.com/the-us-system

FREE Marriage Shutdown Checklist: https://marriedafterkids.com/marriage-shutdown?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=links&utm_campaign=MSoptin

Connect with me for a FREE Married After Kids Intervention Call:

https://marriedafterkids.satoriapp.com/offers/277730-married-after-kids-intervention-call

Follow me on Instagram so you don’t miss a thing! www.instagram.com/marriedafterkids