YouTuber Johnny Harris grew up in Mormonism (LDS), and YouTuber Calvin Wayman, also grew up in Mormonism—but a different branch known as Fundamentalist Mormonism. In this episode, they explore the shared history of the Church.
Inquiry and curiosity led both of them out. In this episode, Calvin and Johnny compare and contrast their journeys, while also sharing some key moments in Mormon history that aren’t often talked about.
TIMESTAMPS
00:00:00 Teaser and intro
00:02:27 Special message from Calvin
00:03:31 “There’s a level of stress that just doesn’t go away, you can’t escape it!” Calvin talks Johnny Harris about his successful YouTube career (Episode begins)
00:05:19 “What would you do differently?” (Calvin asks Johnny for creator-advice)
00:06:47 Johnny and Calvin were both terrible employees.
00:08:57 “I was in two different worlds” (Johnny explains living in Mormonism in Oregon)
00:09:59 Swapping “crack” stories—when Calvin and Johnny started to realize that Mormonism didn’t have a monopoly on Truth.
00:13:19 “It’s when I had a kid!” (How becoming a dad made Johnny start to doubt Mormonism)
00:15:24 “I forced myself to have mystical experiences.” (Johnny explains who he was in Mormonism and how began to be more true to his nature)
00:17:07 “I knew in my body that this wasn’t working. There was a deep tension. I can’t bull-shit with myself anymore.”
00:18:05 Calvin shares one of his choice points for leaving
00:18:33 The “Mormon” Shelf (explaining mental thought-traps)
00:20:50 Johnny's “big critique” with the Mormon Church
00:22:48 “Everything crumbled for me.” (The moment Johnny left.)
00:23:59 Introducing our shared fore-father—Joseph Smith, founder of Mormonism
00:24:44 Johnny becoming an apologist.
00:25:49 The shared history (and “secret conflict”) of Fundamentalist Mormons and “Regular” Mormons
00:26:35 How polygamy “really” ended in Mormonism (Not what you've heard)
00:28:03 Mass ex-communications on a significant minority in the LDS Church (Learning "the Truth")
00:29:07 External motivations the Church had to end polygamy.
00:30:42 The LDS Church becoming more "palatable"
00:33:11 “I did not know about this, this is really juicy stuff!” (Calvin shares "proof" why Fundamentalists are right and the LDS Church is wrong)
00:38:47 “The best story wins.” (How Mormon beliefs have persisted)
00:40:28 “I feel the spirit right now talking about it.” (The good parts of Mormonism)
00:45:56 The different experiences between men and women in Mormonism (and best part about being ex-mormon)
00:49:15 After leaving: “It’s a reclaiming” of your story.
00:50:26 “Red lines” — knowing how to talk about our stories without being disrespectful to those who still believe.
00:53:26 Choosing how to discuss hot-button history.
00:56:43 “I was washed over with a genuine sense of thrill.” (Embracing uncertainty in a post-Mormon world)
00:59:29 Calvin shares his new-found joy in the simple things
01:00:14 Ending on the deep end—Calvin asks Johnny “What are you most proud of?”
01:01:56 “What in your 20s built the most self-respect?”
01:03:11 “What are you most grateful for about life now?”
01:04:39 Final thoughts
About Johnny Harris:
Johnny Harris is an American filmmaker, journalist, and YouTube. To learn more about him and his experience with the LDS Church, go to one of the videos below:
- “Why I Left the Mormon Church” - https://youtu.be/aTMsfOcHiJg?si=ZpeoLkXSE6jrYTPt
- “The REAL Story of the Mormon Church.” - https://youtu.be/hUW7j9GmXjI?si=_0UsCclKEnBgYq8r
About Calvin Wayman:
Hey I’m Calvin. I grew up in a Fundamentalist Mormon cult that practices polygamy, known as “The Work of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.” I have 1 dad, 4 moms, and 44 siblings. Yup. That’s not a typo—forty plus four. All in one house.
The last few years have been me getting my feet under me, and today I live in New York City.
Catch more of my story here: “What Was It Like Growing Up in a Cult?” - https://youtu.be/kBlQ22wIbnA?si=0QNw_e_S1ZZXZ5m9
