In this episode of 'Hey White Women', the first recorded after the 2024 election, hosts Daniella and Rebecca engage in a deep conversation about the role of white women in dismantling white supremacy. They discuss the importance of acknowledging discomfort, the need for collective action, and the power of community in creating change. The conversation emphasizes the necessity of listening to marginalized voices, the journey of healing, and the complexities involved in challenging ingrained societal norms. Through personal anecdotes and reflections, they encourage listeners to take action and be part of the solution.

Connect with Rebecca at:

Website

Patreon

TikTok

Connect with Daniella at:

Daniella's Patreon

TikTok

Instagram

Website

Youtube

Uncultured by Daniella Mestyanek Young

• From Bookshop.org

• Autographed

• UnAMERICAN Videobook

Takeaways

• White women have a crucial role in dismantling white supremacy.
• Discomfort and shame can be powerful motivators for change.
• Community and collective action are essential for progress.
• Listening to marginalized voices is vital in the fight against oppression.
• Healing and personal growth are necessary parts of the journey.
• Resistance against oppressive systems is a shared responsibility.
• The complexity of societal change requires patience and understanding.
• Building a better future involves acknowledging past mistakes.
• Empathy and compassion are key in supporting one another.
• The journey towards equality is ongoing and requires commitment.

Sound Bites

"We were always in this place."
"You have agency, you have power."
"We need to be learning from history."

Chapters

00:00 Deconstructing White Supremacy
03:25 The Cult of Politics and Betrayal
06:22 Agency and Resistance in a Cult
09:48 Historical Context and Lessons Learned
12:35 The Role of Generations in Change
15:36 Understanding Comfort and Discomfort
18:36 The Power of Ex-Members in Cults
30:29 The Quest for Moral Superiority
36:25 Community Building and Running Interference
41:13 The Role of White Women in Supporting Black Voices
44:23 Shared Missions and Collective Responsibility
55:13 The Complexity of Social Issues and the Search for Easy Answers
01:00:30 Understanding Discomfort vs. Danger
01:05:15 Navigating the Journey of Self-Discovery
01:07:29 The Importance of Patience in Growth
01:09:37 The Role of Generosity in Relationships
01:12:39 Challenging the Notion of Earning
01:16:25 The Impact of Capitalism on Relationships
01:19:02 Addressing Societal Issues Together
01:21:13 Building a Safe Community for All

Produced by Haley Phillips

This unplanned conversation delves into the complexities of anti-racism, personal growth, and the impact of societal norms on individual experiences. The speakers discuss the importance of language, the challenges of navigating discomfort, and the role of community in healing. They also explore the intersection of mental health and racism, emphasizing the need for systemic change and the journey of self-discovery. In this conversation, Haley and Rebecca delve into the complexities of identity, focusing on the intersections of race, gender, and disability. They discuss the unique experiences of black women, the societal norms surrounding gender conversations, and the impact of legislation on personal choices. The dialogue emphasizes the importance of appreciation over validation in engaging with marginalized voices, highlighting the need for safer spaces and the recognition of diverse experiences.

Connect with Rebecca at:

Website

Patreon

TikTok

Connect with Daniella at:

Daniella's Patreon

TikTok

Instagram

Website

Youtube

Uncultured by Daniella Mestyanek Young

• From Bookshop.org

• Autographed

• UnAMERICAN Videobook

Takeaways

• Anti-racism must be made accessible to everyone.
• Perfectionism is a barrier to genuine anti-racist work.
• Deconstructing belief systems requires patience and openness.
• Language shapes our understanding of race and identity.
• Discomfort is a necessary part of growth and learning.
• Community support is vital in the healing process.
• Mental health issues are often exacerbated by societal pressures.
• Self-discovery is a continuous journey, not a destination.
• Rest and relaxation are essential for personal well-being.
• Understanding personal trauma can inform our interactions with others.
• our trauma is rooted in the tenets of race.
• Race is gendered and gender is racialized.
• We need safer places for black women to express themselves.
• Legislation impacts personal choices significantly.
• Survivor's guilt can complicate feelings of freedom.
• Engagement with black voices should focus on appreciation, not validation.
• The complexity of black womanhood is often overlooked.
• Gender conversations are still evolving in society.
• Understanding intersectionality is crucial for empathy.
• Education does not equate to understanding lived experiences.

Sound Bites

"The gaslighting is insane."
"We [black women] are the most educated."
"Don't relate, appreciate."

Produced by Haley Phillips

In this conversation, Daniella and Rebecca explore the complexities of human nature, the oversimplification of good and evil narratives, and the importance of rehumanization in social discourse. They discuss the role of white women in social justice, the impact of capitalism on group dynamics, and the necessity of discomfort for personal growth. The conversation emphasizes the power of personal narratives, critical thinking, and storytelling in fostering empathy and understanding, while also addressing the limitations of white feminism and the need for preventative measures in societal issues.

Connect with Rebecca at:

Website

Patreon

TikTok

Connect with Daniella at:

Daniella's Patreon

TikTok

Instagram

Website

Youtube

Uncultured by Daniella Mestyanek Young

• From Bookshop.org

• Autographed

• UnAMERICAN Videobook

Sound Bites

"Nothing's ever obviously evil."
"We need to find the human."
"It's not helpful to call everything a cult."

Takeaways

• The narrative of good and evil is often oversimplified.
• Rehumanization is essential in understanding complex issues.
• Cults often thrive on dehumanization and manipulation.
• Discomfort is a necessary part of growth and change.
• White women have a unique role in advocating for social change.
• The illusion of safety can prevent necessary actions.
• Capitalism influences group dynamics and perpetuates harmful systems.
• Personal narratives are powerful tools for understanding and change.
• Humor can be an effective way to address serious topics.
• Not all groups can be classified as 'good' under capitalism.
• White feminism can sometimes overshadow the voices of women of color.
• Critical thinking is essential in understanding social issues.
• Preventative measures are often undervalued in society.
• Historical context is crucial for understanding current issues.
• Storytelling can bridge gaps in understanding and empathy.
• Self-discovery is a lifelong journey that involves acknowledging past mistakes.
• Change is a natural part of personal growth and understanding.
• Human nature is complex and cannot be easily categorized.
• Empathy and understanding are vital for social progress.

Chapters

00:00 The Complexity of Good and Evil
03:38 Rehumanization and the Danger of Labels
06:43 Understanding Cult Dynamics and Societal Norms
09:46 The Role of Discomfort in Social Change
12:33 Navigating Power Dynamics and Privilege
15:50 The Importance of Trusting Intuition
18:30 The Fragility of Comfort and Its Consequences
21:40 The Role of White Women in Social Justice
24:50 The Ripple Effect of Advocacy
27:53 The Need for Authentic Voices in Conversations
30:37 The Impact of White Fragility on Dialogue
39:02 Understanding White Supremacy and Its Tenets
43:14 The Role of Prevention in Society
45:40 The Value of Video and Synchronous Conversations
50:27 Personal Growth and Changing Perspectives
52:32 The Importance of Acknowledging Personal History
57:38 Dehumanization in Systems of Power
01:00:53 The Complexity of Good and Evil in Society
01:05:33 The Importance of Passionate Discourse
01:07:51 The Complexity of Human Nature and Group Dynamics
01:11:43 Creating Safe Spaces for Discussion

Produced by: Haley Phillips

In this conversation, Daniella and Rebecca explore the intersections of entertainment, identity, and societal structures. They discuss the role of whiteness in shaping experiences, the burdens of perfectionism and productivity, and the implications of the cult of entrepreneurship. The conversation delves into the dynamics of social media, the weaponization of secrets, and the importance of community versus group dynamics. They also reflect on the impact of capitalism on human value, the complexities of international relations, and the need for transparency in systems. Ultimately, they emphasize the importance of individuality and the role of women in society, while advocating for a more nuanced understanding of these issues.

Connect with Rebecca at:

Website

Patreon

TikTok

Connect with Daniella at:

Daniella's Patreon

TikTok

Instagram

Website

Youtube

Uncultured by Daniella Mestyanek Young

• From Bookshop.org

• Autographed

• UnAMERICAN Videobook

Takeaways

• Entertainment is a crucial aspect of teaching and content creation.
• Navigating identity in relation to whiteness can be complex and challenging.
• Perfectionism and productivity are often burdensome in corporate culture.
• The cult of entrepreneurship can perpetuate harmful dynamics and expectations.
• Social media can amplify cult-like behaviors and influence.
• Secrets can be weaponized to maintain power and control.
• Community is distinct from groups; it involves individuality and shared experiences.
• Capitalism often dehumanizes individuals, treating them as resources.
• Rethinking freedom requires examining societal structures and their implications.
• Historical figures and their legacies impact contemporary discussions on identity and power.

Sound Bites

"You are the entertainment."
"Know your place aggression."
"Rest is productive."

Chapters

00:00 The Role of Entertainment in Content Creation
02:26 Navigating Identity and Race
04:50 The Boredom of Whiteness
07:19 The Burden of Productivity
11:58 The Cult of Entrepreneurship
19:28 Influencers and Cult Dynamics
24:28 The Complexity of Credibility
30:15 Understanding Cult Dynamics
36:52 The Tyranny of Definitions
42:21 The Art of Human Connection
48:17 The Cult of Employment
52:06 The Dehumanizing Nature of Systems
54:44 The Impact of Sleep Deprivation on Life
57:50 The Electronic Leash of Work Culture
01:00:53 The Weaponization of Secrets in Governance
01:05:05 Patriarchy and the Culture of Violence
01:09:45 Community vs. Group Dynamics
01:15:02 The Need for Human-Centric Systems

This conversation explores the complexities of ageism, objectivity, and bias, particularly in relation to race and gender. The speakers discuss the societal perceptions of age, the historical context of bias, and the reinterpretation of myths through feminist lenses. They delve into the impact of gender in combat and leadership roles, the illusion of popularity and happiness, and the flaws of objectivity in society. The discussion also touches on cognitive dissonance, indoctrination, and the intersection of whiteness and objectivity, emphasizing the dangers of extremism and the importance of nuanced conversations in challenging societal norms.

Connect with Rebecca at:

Website

Patreon

TikTok

Connect with Daniella at:

Daniella's Patreon

TikTok

Instagram

Website

Youtube

Uncultured by Daniella Mestyanek Young

• From Bookshop.org

• Autographed

• UnAMERICAN Videobook

Takeaways

• Ageism is perceived differently across communities.
• Objectivity is often a facade used to assert dominance.
• Historical narratives are often biased and subjective.
• Feminist retellings of myths challenge patriarchal perspectives.
• Gender diversity in leadership enhances effectiveness.
• The pursuit of popularity does not guarantee happiness.
• Cognitive dissonance complicates personal beliefs and actions.
• Indoctrination can occur in various forms, including societal norms.
• Whiteness often dictates the perception of objectivity.
• Extremism thrives on the need for certainty and belonging.

Sound Bites

"Ageism in the black community just doesn't fly."
"Objectivity doesn't exist, but it's weaponized."

Chapters

00:00 Challenging Perspectives on Ageism and Objectivity
04:08 The Role of Bias in Historical Contexts
07:04 Reinterpreting Myths Through Feminist Lenses
09:59 The Impact of Gender in Combat and Leadership
13:02 The Illusion of Popularity and Happiness
16:04 The Flaws in Measuring Success and Happiness
18:56 Recognizing Red Flags in Relationships and Cults
21:54 The Complexity of Indoctrination and Self-Identity
25:01 The Dangers of Extremism and Objectivity
27:47 The Role of Whiteness in Conflict and Identity
31:04 Navigating Relationships Across Racial Lines
33:50 The Burden of Representation and Identity
36:58 The Importance of Conflict in Personal Growth
39:56 The Role of Emotions in Decision Making
43:06 The Nuances of Anti-Racism and Personal Responsibility
45:58 The Intersection of Trauma and Identity
48:59 The Complexity of Objectivity and Subjectivity
51:55 The Role of Humor and Stereotypes in Society
54:52 The Value of Suffering and Hard Work
57:54 The Need for Change in Leadership Dynamics
01:00:58 The Search for Identity Beyond White Supremacy

Produced by Haley Phillips

In this conversation, Daniella and Rebecca explore the intersections of cult dynamics, whiteness, and gender, discussing how personal experiences shape broader societal issues. They delve into the importance of language, the exit costs of leaving cults, and the power of storytelling. The discussion emphasizes the need for community support, the role of silence in conversations, and the challenges of navigating identity and intersectionality. They also reflect on the impact of personal narratives on societal change and the importance of inclusivity and representation in various spaces.

Books:

Caste by Isabel Wilkerson

Connect with Rebecca at:

Website

Patreon

TikTok

Connect with Daniella at:

Daniella's Patreon

TikTok

Instagram

Website

Youtube

Uncultured by Daniella Mestyanek Young

• From Bookshop.org

• Autographed

• UnAMERICAN Videobook

Takeaways

• Cults often use language to control and manipulate individuals.
• Personal hobbies can intersect with political discussions.
• Gender dynamics affect everyday interactions and experiences.
• Leaving a cult involves significant emotional and social costs.
• Storytelling is a powerful tool for understanding and healing.
• Silence can be both a protective and a harmful force in conversations.
• Objectivity in data can be misleading; personal narratives matter.
• Community support is crucial for personal empowerment.
• Inclusivity requires active participation and acknowledgment of diverse voices.
• Reimagining life beyond traditional structures can lead to personal freedom.

Chapters

00:00 Introduction and Background
03:39 Challenges Faced by Women
06:44 The Language of White Supremacy
12:45 The High Costs of Leaving Cults
26:18 Silencing and Performative Regulation
37:44 The Power of Community and Inclusivity
41:34 Challenges and Risks of Speaking Out
47:41 White Women's Role in Amplifying Marginalized Voices
52:06 Learning from Mistakes and Acknowledging Growth
57:23 The Power of Language and Storytelling
01:03:13 Challenging Societal Norms and Expectations
01:07:27 Prioritizing Self-Care and Personal Growth
01:12:02 Empowering Individuals to Create Change
01:14:56 Recognizing the Limitations of Objectivity
01:17:22 Finding Your Own Path and Creating Your Own Rules

Produced by Haley Phillips