After my stroke, it was like I stood with my pants on fire beside a pool of water wondering why my pants were on fire instead of jumping in. I spent two years post-stroke in denial, searching for someone to blame rather than accepting that my life would never be the same, and my career was over. I couldn’t begin again until I accepted this.

It is often said that the definition of insanity is doing things repeatedly expecting different results. I beg to differ—this is the definition of denial that leads to insanity if not interrupted. I didn't know that the pain that I was feeling and the problem with my eyes was a chronic disability. I just wanted to be normal, like everyone else. I didn't know that giving in did not mean giving up.

I didn't want to be an alcoholic stroke survivor in recovery. I wasn't willing to give up anything until I had to give up everything to recover. I didn't want to be where I was, but I had to BE anyway. Overtime I’ve begun to want to be where I am. That’s what acceptance has felt like for me.

We grow through our willingness to correct our steps as the path in front of us changes direction.

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Visit me at ⁠⁠⁠recoverydailypodcast.com⁠⁠⁠ or email me at ⁠rachel@recoverydailypodcast.com⁠.
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