Episodes

  • 467: Staying Focused With Pursuer Vulnerability

    467: Staying Focused With Pursuer Vulnerability
    Nov 22 2024
    Welcome Foreplay listeners! Today's episode is another in our 'School of Love' series that we are close to completing. We are talking today about how to stay and keep focused on the pursuing partner as they express their vulnerability. Listen in as George and Laurie breakdown the steps a couple needs to have completed before getting to this point and how both partners can stay focused on the pursuer's pain. This is a place where withdrawers are now able to give their pursuing partner love that they never received before. This can be scary territory for both but this is also the place where a new, positive and secure cycle is created. The key here is responsiveness. Focus on ways to respond to your partner's pain that helps them feel seen, heard and understood. These are key attachment needs that are important to us ALL. Check out this episode's sponsors: Leesa.com Foriawellness.com/foreplay Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    37 mins
  • 466: The S*xual Pursuer Gets Their Day

    466: The S*xual Pursuer Gets Their Day
    Nov 15 2024
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    36 mins
  • 465: Stopping the Protest -- How to Help the Emotional Pursuer

    465: Stopping the Protest -- How to Help the Emotional Pursuer
    Nov 13 2024
    "I'm always the one to bring up issues. I want our relationship to be better so I work to address the discomfort between us. Somehow this is a problem and I am now seen as THE problem, a nag, someone that can be tuned out. I've worked so hard here. Help!!!" If this sounds familiar, then this episode on the pursuer's position in the relationship is for you! Join our experts today as they focus on the inside world of the emotional pursuer and help them with the change event that leads to healing in the relationship. George and Laurie work to get underneath the layers of the pursuer's protest to help them and the emotional withdrawer in their life understand the pain, anguish and desperation of the pursuer. This softening event is the gamechanger for pursuers and our recovering emotional withdrawers are pivotal in this change! Learn how to manage rejection and communicate the underlying need with safety and vulnerability. Our hosts' roleplay highlights for listeners exactly what this conversation can sound like. Make sure to come back for our follow up show on the sexual pursuer next time. As always, keep it hot y'all! Check out this episode's sponsor: Cook Unity! Go to cookunity.com/foreplay or use the code foreplay at checkout to get 50% off your first week of dinners! Great for those busy days when you don't have the time to prep and cook a meal! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    34 mins
  • 464: The S*X Answer for Couples

    464: The S*X Answer for Couples
    Nov 1 2024
    Will sex ever happen between us? If this has been a sticking point in your relationship then this episode is for you! Join our hosts today as we talk through what it looks like when the sexual withdrawer is re-engaged. The negative cycle is de-escalated, a new positive cycle has been created and there is enough safety to uncover the wants and needs of the sexual relationship. Give this show a listen to hear what the conversation between a de-escalated and more secure couple sounds like and how to make this happen. Our hosts remind you that pressure serves no purpose in the bedroom and a truly de-escalated couple will keep pressure around sex low and slow. It's important to remember that sometimes we have to go slow, to go fast. Make sure to give us a rate and review and keep it hot, y'all! Check out this episodes sponsors! BetterHelp.com/foreplay -- Easy, convenient therapy! Get 10% off your first month! Uberlube.com -- Laurie's long-time favorite lubricant! Use the code 'foreplay' at checkout to receive 10% off your order! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    35 mins
  • 463: How to Create Lasting Change in Your Relationship

    463: How to Create Lasting Change in Your Relationship
    Oct 25 2024
    In today's episode, join hosts Laurie and George as they uncover the ultimate move that creates lasting change in couples. The changemaker for a negative cycle is when the withdrawing partner is able to stay in their fear and uncover their unmet need. In the negative cycle the old move to sense the discomfort and move away immediately begins to be replaced with a new ability to tolerate and remain present. Staying in the fear, with your partner close at hand allows you to ask, "What do I need here? Can you help me with it?" This new experience sends a message through the body and brain that this is now safe and we are rewarded with closeness and comfort where there was once isolation. We are not meant to be alone! George reminds withdrawers that you must risk if you want the reward. Our hosts role play, guides listeners in this meaningful conversation and reminds them, this is possible in your relationship! Therapists--Join us in Nashville January 25-27th for our Sex and EFT training to help your couples with their negative sexual cycle. Check out this episode's sponsor and help support the podcast! ForiaWellness.com/foreplay -- great products to enhance your sex life! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    36 mins
  • 462: HELP! I'm a Burnt Out Sexual Pursuer

    462: HELP! I'm a Burnt Out Sexual Pursuer
    Oct 19 2024
    In today's episode, Laurie and George answer a listener's mailbag question. We love getting these write-ins and acknowledge the courage it takes to ask for help! Our listener is a burned out or almost burned out sexual pursuer that is frustrated and saddened by their sexless marriage. Covid, menopause, adult children at home are circumstances this couple is facing and blocks for intimate connection. George and Laurie give expert advice on how to navigate this situation, some of the physiological challenges impacting this couple and how to craft a thoughtful, caring and loving conversation to bridge the gap. Both pursuers and withdrawers will gain insight into the lives of their partners and we remember to blame the cycle to de-escalate the tension and encourage vulnerable conversation. Need help in your relationship? Send us a question on our website www.foreplayrst.com Check out this episode's sponsors: RocketMoney.com/foreplay -- Save money by getting rid of those subscriptions that you don't use that continue to auto renew! Uberlube.com/foreplay -- Laurie's favorite lubricant for the past 25 years! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    36 mins
  • 461: Managing the Change Process

    461: Managing the Change Process
    Oct 19 2024
    You've probably waited years for your partner to hear you and make the changes you've needed. So why does that change now make you feel pissed off? The answer: mistrust is part of the change process. Learning how to manage this mistrust is imperative for couples when they are changing their negative cycle. In today's episode join our hosts Laurie and George in a fantastic conversation on what happens to us when our partners start to make the changes we've been asking for, for years and why that can cause mistrust. You'll learn what's happening in your brain when there is a red light, yellow light or green light in connection and strategies to promote regulation and connection. Remember, our brains are wired to protect and they want to hold on to the negative information for safety. Leaning into the mistrust and planning for this with your partner as you're changing together will help you navigate this new territory and be more successful. Therapists looking to get more training on the sexual cycle make sure to head over to our website www.foreplayrst.com to learn more about our training in Nashville this January! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    37 mins
  • 460: Re-engaging the Sexual Withdrawer

    460: Re-engaging the Sexual Withdrawer
    Oct 5 2024
    Run, don't walk to listen to today's episode! Laurie and George lay out a transformational conversation between partners: when the sexual withdrawer begins to reenage. Re-engagement means, the sexual withdrawer is aware that something is not working, sees the negative cycle and their part in it and begins to open up to their partner about their underlying needs. This is a pivotal conversation and can be a gamechanger for couples that have been trapped in a negative sexual cycle. Both withdrawing and pursuing partners will find value in the expert commentary laid out by our hosts. Did you know that knowing what you need and sending clearer signals to your partner is a sign of secure attachment? For so many of us, being direct with what we want, need, like and desire has been off limits but it is a major component to secure and successful love. Join us today and drop a review of this episode so we know how we're doing! Check out our great sponsors for this episode: Uberlube.com - Laurie's favorite sexual lubricant! RocketMoney.com/foreplay - Get rid of those pesky recurring subscriptions that you don't use and gain control of your spending! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    37 mins