Fatherhood Unbounded: Breaking Cycles and Building Legacy

Featuring Dr. Mathew Alemu, PhD

In this powerful and deeply resonant episode, Dr. (Hon) Kelly R. Little sits down with Dr. Mathew Alemu, a sociologist, researcher, and thought leader whose work uncovers the emotional, relational, and historical layers of fatherhood and father absence in the Black community. Together, they explore what it means to navigate identity, love, legacy, and healing through the lens of personal experience and rigorous research.

Episode Summary

Reframing Father Absence: Beyond Stereotypes & Statistics

Dr. Alemu introduces a groundbreaking typology of father absence patterned, unpatterned, extended, and absolute that disrupts the limited narratives often imposed on Black fathers. His research challenges harmful assumptions by capturing the nuance of fathers who are physically present but emotionally disconnected, or those absent due to work demands rather than abandonment.

Through candid storytelling, Dr. Alemu shares his own journey of reconnecting with his father after 15 years. This reunion reshaped his understanding of fatherhood, encouraged him to examine his own biases, and fueled his mission to humanize the lived experiences of non-resident fathers.

Identity, Race, and the Emotional Landscape of Fatherhood

Kelly and Matthew explore how race, guilt, passive aggression, and systemic inequities shape fatherhood experiences, especially for Black men. Kelly opens up about the emotional toll of fathers’ lack of support in instances, while emphasizing the power of emotional intelligence in navigating these obstacles.

Dr. Alemu shares insights from his research on young Black men’s ideologies of fatherhood, highlighting the deep desire many have to rewrite generational narratives even without concrete memories of their own fathers. His interviews, often lasting three hours, create therapeutic, judgment-free spaces where men unpack pain, reveal vulnerability, and imagine healthier futures.

Healing, Legacy & The Desire to Do Better

The conversation examines how many men develop fictionalized or partially imagined interpretations of their fathers to guide their own parenting strategies. Dr. Alemu notes a common refrain among men who experienced extreme absence:

“I just don’t want my kids to feel what I felt.”

Kelly shares the transformative story of NFL legend Ray Lewis and his father, framing it as a reflection of how forgiveness, truth-telling, and emotional processing can break generational cycles.

Together, they emphasize that economic solutions alone cannot heal the emotional ruptures caused by father absence, men need safe, judgment-free spaces to process their stories and reclaim their identities.

Collaborating for Change: Fatherhood, Child Support & Maternal Health

The episode closes with a rich discussion about merging research and practice. Dr. Alemu and Kelly imagine new pathways for policy reform, fatherhood engagement, economic mobility, and shifting public narratives around non-resident fathers, child support, and maternal health equity.

They agree that the future of fatherhood work requires partnership, empathy, and human-centered design.

About the Guest

Dr. Mathew Alemu, PhD
Sociologist | Fatherhood Researcher | Public Scholar
LinkedIn: Mathew Alemu, PhD
Email: Matthew.alemu@gmail.com

Closing Reflection

This episode is a reminder that the stories men carry, about absence, presence, pain, or reconciliation—shape generations. When fathers are given space to heal, the entire community heals with them.

Episode Summary

In this inspiring episode of Fathers Haven, we welcome fatherhood coach Chad M. Morris to explore how dads especially those operating outside traditional norms can step in with intention, find their voice, and become agents of change in their families and communities. We dig into Chad’s personal and professional journey, unpack meaningful ways fathers can connect, and explore seven powerful questions to help listeners engage deeply with their role as dads.

Guest Bio: Chad M. Morris

Chad M. Morris brings more than a decade of experience in human-services and fatherhood development. According to his profile, he hasworked over 12 years in community-based mental health and family stabilization programs through his role as CEO of Trinity Family Life Center in Richmond, Virginia.

He serves as a Master Trainer for the National Fatherhood Initiative’s NPCL (National Practitioners’ Community of Learning) and is a certified Fatherhood Life Coach trained in the “Boyhood to Manhood Rites of Passage Curriculum.”

Chad currently leads his own consultancy, Proving Grounds Success Strategies & Consulting where he partners with organizations to engage, equip, and empower fathers and men.

He also played a key fatherhood-coach role in thedocumentary Daughters, which follows young girls preparing for a “Daddy-Daughter Dance” with incarcerated fathers, giving him unique insight into non-traditional fatherhood settings.

Key Segments & Topics

Origins & Motivation – Chad shares his journey: how he encountered fatherhood work, what personal experiences shaped his calling, and how “outside the margins” fatherhood became central to his mission.

• Defining “Outside the Margins” – A deep dive into what it means when fathers feel marginalized socially, economically, culturally, or relationally. How do we create inclusive spaces for dads who don’t fit the “traditional” mold?

• Tools & Strategies for Engagement – Practical tactics Chad has developed and deployed: peer coaching, rites-of-passage frameworks, father-daughter programs, community collaborations.

• Spotlight on Impact – Real stories: dads who changed trajectories, families transformed, or systems shifted because fathers stepped in.

• Empowerment Through Reflection – Absorb this powerful content, we need listeners not just to hear but to absorb, reflect, and apply.

Next Steps & Invitation How listeners, whether asfathers, mentors, or practitioners can plug in, lean in, and make an impact. Chad closes with a rallying call.

Closing & Call to Action

This episode with Chad M. Morris isn’t just about hearing a story it’s about living one. We invite our listeners to step outside the margins of how they think fatherhood “should be” and claim how it can be.Here’s how you can engage:

• Resonate with the conversation: Pick one of the many jewels shared and apply it. Write it down. Let it sit. Then act on the insight it brings this week.

• Find your community: Whether it’s a father-group, a mentor, a coach, or peer circle, then connect and hold each other to presence and purpose.

• Find a space to share your story: Post a reflection (if you’re comfortable) on social media or in your father-circle about one step you took this week. Use hashtag #FathersHaven to join the conversation.

• Get involved with Chad’s work: Follow Chad M. Morris on LinkedIn and explore his offeringswith Proving Grounds Success Strategies & Consulting.

• Stay tuned: Subscribe to Fathers Haven so you don’t miss future episodes where we lean into father-presence, community, andtransformation.

Your presence matters. Your story matters. Your father journey is worthy of committing to and celebrating. Let’s rise up together.

In this transformative episode of The Fathers Haven Podcast we hear about Mindful Men in Family Services, in our sit down with Derek Miller, a dynamic Male Engagement Specialist in Head Start, who shares his heart, humor, and hard-earned wisdom about redefining masculinity in early childhood spaces.

Together, we dive into the concept of “Dad Strength”—not just physical strength, but the emotional resilience, patience, and power it takes for men to show up in family services, caregiving, and parenting with presence and purpose.
We break down the stereotypes that often box men out of early childhood programs and explore what it truly means to meet fathers where they are, ask the right questions, and invite men into Head Start in ways that feel welcoming, affirming, and empowering.
Derek also shares deeply moving reflections on his time as a stay-at-home dad to three young boys, and how that experience reshaped his appreciation for caregiving, emotional labor, and the partnership in parenting. His vulnerability and insight challenge us to rethink what leadership looks like in families—and in Head Start.

This is more than a conversation—it’s a call to action to shift cultures, build bridges, and honor the full humanity of men in family services.

🎙️ Key Topics Include:
What is “Dad Strength” and how do we nurture it

Overcoming stereotypes and cultural barriers

The power of vulnerability and lived experience

Father-inclusive strategies in Head Start

How being a stay-at-home dad transformed Derek’s life
🎧 Don’t miss this episode. It’s real, it’s reflective, and it’s the conversation the field has been waiting for.