In Episode 32 of our Week 4 Lenten journey with St. Bernard of Clairvaux’s On Loving God, we reflect on the furthest reach of love: when love is so healed and rightly ordered in God that a person can receive even his own life as gift. St. Bernard is careful here. He is not describing a return to self-interest, but a self restored by grace and rightly loved in God.

In conversation with the Holy Rule of St. Benedict, this episode explores how humility, obedience, stability and prayer loosen the grip of self-will and free the soul from anxious self-protection. The false self begins to fade, not so the person disappears, but so the whole person can be more deeply healed and ordered toward God. Bernard shows that when love is purified, the self is no longer grasped or defended, but received.

This episode offers a beautiful and careful vision of spiritual maturity. The soul does not become less human, but more deeply restored in God. Love is no longer divided between God and self in the old way. It comes to rest. This kind of union is not something we achieve by effort, but a gift of grace that can quietly grow in a life marked by prayer, humility, repentance and perseverance.

St. Bernard of Clairvaux, On Loving God, Chapter 15 §§30-40

“In the fourth degree, man loves himself,
but for God’s sake.
This happens when he so clings to God
that he becomes one spirit with Him,
and can say with the Apostle:
‘He who is joined to the Lord becomes one spirit with Him.’”

“In quarto gradu diligit homo se ipsum propter Deum. Quod fit cum ita inhaeret Deo, ut unus spiritus fiat cum eo, et dicat cum Apostolo: Qui adhaeret Domino, unus spiritus est.”

“He who is united to the Lord becomes one spirit with him.”

1. Do I notice ways that I still cling to myself anxiously rather than receiving my life as gift from God?

2. How does St. Bernard help me understand the difference between self-interest and a self rightly loved in God?

3. In what areas of my life is God inviting me to let go of fear, resentment or self-assertion?

4. How are humility, obedience, stability, and prayer helping to loosen the grip of self-will in me?

5. Do I find it difficult to believe that God desires not only to save me, but to heal and rightly order my whole life in Him?

6. What might it look like for me to receive myself more peacefully as one who belongs to God?

7. How does this teaching invite me to greater trust in the hidden work of grace?

Copyright © 2026 Kris McGregor. All rights reserved. No portion of this content may be reproduced, distributed, published, or transmitted in any form, including audio, print, or digital media, without prior written permission from Discerning Hearts®.

Scripture Reading (Jerusalem Bible):

Jeremiah 11:18–20
The Lord revealed it to me; I was warned.
O Lord, that was when You opened my eyes to their scheming.
I for my part was like a trustful lamb being led to the slaughter,
not knowing the schemes they were plotting against me.
“Let us destroy the tree in its strength,
cut him off from the land of the living,
so that his name may be quickly forgotten.”
But You, O Lord of hosts, who judge justly,
who test the heart and mind,
let me see Your vengeance upon them,
for to You I have committed my cause.

Jeremiah’s lament foreshadows the suffering of Christ. Like a lamb led to the slaughter, he entrusts his life to God even as he is surrounded by betrayal and injustice. It’s a reminder that God’s faithful ones are not immune to suffering—and sometimes the most difficult moments are the ones no one else sees.

This hidden suffering—the kind that doesn’t always come with answers—can be the most spiritually fruitful. It invites us into the interior work of trust, surrender, and deep listening. It is the refining fire where God’s grace silently goes to work.

Even the Blessed Virgin Mary knew this path well. At the Finding in the Temple, she did not understand why Jesus had remained behind, but we’re told she “kept all these things in her heart” (Luke 2:51). Her quiet pondering is not passive—it is the active trust of a heart that says yes, even without clarity. Mary reminds us that part of the Christian life is carrying unanswered questions with peace, knowing God is still present and working.

There are times in life when we must keep going in faith, even when our hearts feel weary or our path unclear. These are the moments when silent prayer, especially before the Blessed Sacrament, becomes essential. This hidden work—of listening, of remaining, of trusting—is how saints are formed.

The Desert Father Abba Isaiah said:

“It is better to struggle in silence before God than to be praised for words that do not touch the soul.”
(Apophthegmata Patrum, Isaiah 1)

And St. Elizabeth of the Trinity, a great Carmelite mystic, wrote:

“Let yourself be loved more than these… Let yourself be loved: that is everything.”
(Letter 252)

Lent invites us into this mystery. We are not always called to do more, but to let God love us in the silence. In the hidden places of our lives, His grace is at work. Our part is to stay open, to keep returning, and to say yes—even in the quiet.

1. Are there areas of your life where you feel unseen or misunderstood?
2. How can you imitate Mary’s trust in moments that lack clarity?
3. What does “letting yourself be loved” by God look like for you today?

Lord, You see the hidden places of my heart. In moments when I do not understand, help me to trust. Teach me to rest in Your love, even when the path ahead is unclear. May I, like Mary, hold Your Word in my heart and ponder it with faith.

Amen.

This reflection is written by Kris McGregor of Discerning Hearts®. The Scripture passage is taken from the Jerusalem Bible (1966 edition), used with permission. No unauthorized use or reproduction is permitted without prior written consent.

Day 6: Mary, Mother of Light

The Holy Spirit will come upon you and the power of the Most High will overshadow you. (Luke 1:35)

Let us pray:

Jesus, for our salvation You willingly humbled Yourself, becoming Man in the womb of the Virgin Mother, grant me through the mystery of Your holy Incarnation the virtue of humility that I may ever please God as Your Mother did, by meekness and lowliness in this world, and be exalted by You in eternity.

Mary, dear Mother of my Savior, I greet you and I thank you for having received the message of the Archangel Gabriel: “Hail, full of grace, the Lord is with thee” (Luke I:28) and for having answered with your assent, “Behold the handmaid of the Lord, be it done to me according to thy word.” (Luke 1:38) Intercede for me that God the Father, who accepted you as His Daughter and the Mother of His Son because of your humility at the Annunciation, may accept me as humble child. Amen

Steps to Take as You Follow Christ

Ask—Am I focused on unity or division within the body of Christ?

Seek—Give thanks to God ahead of time in your prayers. Think of how Jesus instituted the Eucharist (i.e., “thanksgiving”) on the night before he died. When you are at Mass, consciously give thanks to God through Jesus for all that God has done and will do in your life.

Knock—Meditate on Ephesians 5:1–2.

Try, then, to imitate God as children of his that he loves and follow Christ loving as he loved you, giving himself up in our place as a fragrant offering and a sacrifice to God.

How can we imitate God as beloved children? Are there people that we are still divided from? Pray for unity among nations and people of various faiths, and that they may come to know the Savior of mankind, Jesus.

Transform Your Life—Be a thankful person even in the midst of situations where there doesn’t seem to be much to be thankful for—think about Solanus Casey and how even though he was thought of as someone who had little to offer in his community, because of his faith, through God he became one of the most revered members of the house. Trust God at all times.

Michael Dubruiel’s book The Power of the Cross: Applying the Passion of Christ to Your Life is currently available in Kindle format.

You can find the book here:
https://amzn.to/4rTMBK9

To explore more of Amy Welborn’s books and writing, visit:
https://amywelborn.wordpress.com/books-by-amy-welborn/

Check out more at the Discerning Hearts’ Michael Dubruiel page

Excerpt from THE JERUSALEM BIBLE, copyright (c) 1966 by Darton, Longman & Todd, Ltd. and Doubleday, a division of Penguin Random House, Inc. Reprinted by Permission.

In Episode 31 of our Week 4 Lenten journey, we continue with St. Bernard of Clairvaux’s On Loving God and reflect on a deeper purification of love: learning to love God for His own sake. St. Bernard shows that this is a work of grace over time. The soul no longer turns toward God mainly for help, strength, or consolation, but begins to love Him because He is good.

In light of the Holy Rule of St. Benedict, this episode explores how love is purified through stability, obedience, prayer, and perseverance in ordinary daily life. St. Benedict trains the soul not to live by impulse, self-will, or the pursuit of spiritual comfort. Instead, the soul learns to remain with God faithfully, whether in consolation or dryness.

This steady remaining begins to loosen the grip of self-interest. Love becomes quieter, simpler, and more stable. The heart begins to desire God more than His gifts. Through the daily rhythm of prayer, work, silence, and obedience, grace teaches the soul to rest in God with fewer conditions. St. Bernard helps us see that this is not a lofty spiritual achievement, but the slow and real purification of love.

St. Bernard of Clairvaux, On Loving God, Chapter 10 §§27-28

“When God is thus loved for His own sake,
then man truly loves God.
He loves God because God is good,
not because of what he receives from Him.
Such a soul seeks not its own interest,
but God alone,
and rests in Him.”

“Tunc vere diligit homo Deum, cum propter ipsum Deum diligit. Non enim quod ex Deo est, sed ipsum Deum quaerit, nec sua, sed Dei tantum.”

“Whom have I in heaven but thee?
And there is nothing upon earth that I desire besides thee.”

1. Do I notice myself turning to God mainly when I want help, comfort or relief?
2. What does it mean for me to love God because He is good, not only because of what He gives?
3. How is God inviting me to remain faithful in prayer, even when I feel dry or distracted?
4. In what areas of my life does self-will still make it difficult for love to deepen?
5. How are stability, obedience and perseverance shaping my heart during this Lenten season?
6. Am I willing to stay with God even when I do not feel consoled, rewarded or noticed?
7. Where might grace be quietly purifying my love and teaching me to rest more fully in God?

Copyright © 2026 Kris McGregor. All rights reserved. No portion of this content may be reproduced, distributed, published, or transmitted in any form, including audio, print, or digital media, without prior written permission from Discerning Hearts®.

In this episode of The Great Works in Western Literature, Kris McGregor and Joseph Pearce explore Charles Dickens’ Great Expectations, a profound story of personal conversion, moral awakening, and the search for true happiness. Dickens, writing during a time of rapid industrial and social change, presents Pip’s journey, a young boy whose desire for wealth and social status leads him away from the love and humility that once grounded him. Through Pip’s rise and fall, Dickens reveals the illusion of worldly success and the deeper truth that fulfillment is found not in possessions, but in sacrificial love and moral integrity.

Pearce highlights how Great Expectations reflects a deeply Christian vision of life, rooted in repentance, grace, and transformation. Pip’s painful recognition of his own pride and misplaced desires becomes the turning point that leads him back to what truly matters. Dickens’ work not only critiques the social and economic upheavals of Victorian England but also speaks powerfully to modern readers who face similar temptations toward materialism and ambition. Ultimately, the novel reminds us that true “great expectations” are not found in worldly gain, but in the conversion of the heart and the rediscovery of love.

1. Pip’s desire for wealth and status leads him away from those who truly love him. How can the pursuit of success or recognition distort our relationships?

2. Dickens shows that worldly gain does not bring lasting happiness. Where do we see this illusion at work in our own culture or personal lives?

3. Pip gradually becomes aware of his pride and ingratitude. What role does self-examination play in the process of conversion?

4. Joe remains a constant example of faithful, sacrificial love. How does his character challenge our understanding of what it means to love others well?

5. The collapse of Pip’s expectations becomes the moment of grace in his life. How can moments of disappointment or loss become opportunities for spiritual growth?

6. Dickens presents a vision of true wealth rooted in love, humility, and reconciliation. What does it mean for you to live with “enough” rather than always seeking more?

A native of England, Joseph Pearce is the internationally acclaimed author of many books, which include bestsellers such as The Quest for Shakespeare, Tolkien: Man and Myth, The Unmasking of Oscar Wilde, C. S. Lewis and The Catholic Church, Literary Converts, Wisdom and Innocence: A Life of G.K. Chesterton, Solzhenitsyn: A Soul in Exile and Old Thunder: A Life of Hilaire Belloc. His books have been published and translated into Spanish, Portuguese, French, Dutch, Italian, Korean, Mandarin, Croatian, and Polish.

He has hosted two 13-part television series about Shakespeare on EWTN, and has also written and presented documentaries on EWTN on the Catholicism of The Lord of the Rings and The Hobbit. His verse drama, Death Comes for the War Poets, was performed off-Broadway to critical acclaim. He has participated and lectured at a wide variety of international and literary events at major colleges and universities in the U.S., Canada, Britain, Europe, Africa, and South America.

He is a Visiting Professor of Literature at Ave Maria University and a Visiting Chair of Catholic Studies at Thomas More College of Liberal Arts (Merrimack, New Hampshire). He is editor of the St. Austin Review, series editor of the Ignatius Critical Editions, senior instructor with Homeschool Connections, and senior contributor at the Imaginative Conservative and Crisis Magazine. His personal website is www.jpearce.co.