Napoleon famously said, “The word impossible is not in my dictionary.” His can-do spirit helped him make incredible achievements in history. In my dictionary, I want to delete the word “unacceptable” because I’ve discovered that acceptance is love in action, and it’s essential to developing our spiritual intelligence or Spiritual Quotient (SQ).

To be successful or live a good life, we need IQ, EQ, and SQ. Your SQ (Spiritual Quotient) is measured by your ability to love and accept people.

First, we must learn the difference between approval and acceptance. For example, my children may do things I disapprove of, but I must accept them because I love them. Approval is based on law, but acceptance is based on love. Approval is based on the head, but acceptance is based on the heart. That sounds simple enough but not easy to practice.

Jesus wants us to love even our enemies. Many people confuse loving our enemies with approving their actions. No, Jesus wants us to “accept” our enemies without “approving” their behaviors. Otherwise, we could end up demonizing people and justifying violence.

We all have encountered people doing things that we disapprove of. Sometimes, it’s just a minor issue, so we can easily forgive and forget about it, but there are times when people may go above and beyond our tolerance threshold, and we say, “It’s unacceptable.”

In such cases, we muddle the line between approval and acceptance because our strong emotion overrides our ability to see the person apart from their behavior. Jesus wants us to love the person despite their behavior. I know it’s a tall order.

Some people have a lower tolerance threshold than others. They are quick to stick a Scarlet Letter on someone they disapprove of.

Talking about the Scarlet Letter, I am sure most of you have read Nathaniel Hawthorne’s American Classic, “The Scarlet Letter,” or have watched one of the movie adaptations. The story reveals that everyone wears a Scarlet Letter—outwardly or inwardly, legally or secretly—even the holiest man in town has a secret Scarlet Letter beneath his clothes.

The story reveals human nature, keeps us humble, and warns us against hypocrisy. Understanding this human nature would allow us to separate approval from acceptance.

To effectively resolve human conflicts, we must first accept one another. But most people got it backward. They don’t accept others until they approve of their behaviors. Acceptance must be unconditional because that’s what “agape love” is about, the kind of love Jesus taught.

Jesus has shown us the ultimate acceptance on the cross by forgiving and seeing humans as redeemable. He expects us to love one another the way he loves us. That’s a huge challenge, but when you can widen the gap between approval and acceptance, you are on the way to spiritual maturity, as Jesus expected.

Based on this week’s scripture lesson, we will explore Jesus’ teaching on what’s lawful and loveful and how to read the Scarlet Letter A differently. Along the way, we will discover how to raise our SQ—Spiritual Quotient—to live a joyful, meaningful, and fruitful life. Let’s begin!