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  • To Have and to Hold

  • Motherhood, Marriage, and the Modern Dilemma
  • By: Molly Millwood
  • Narrated by: Molly Millwood
  • Length: 9 hrs and 1 min
  • 5.0 out of 5 stars (17 ratings)

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To Have and to Hold

By: Molly Millwood
Narrated by: Molly Millwood
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Publisher's Summary

A clinical psychologist’s exploration of the modern dilemmas women face in the wake of new motherhood.

When Molly Millwood became a mother, she was fully prepared for what she would gain: an adorable baby boy; hard-won mothering skills; and a messy, chaotic, beautiful life. But what she did not expect was what she would lose: aspects of her identity, a baseline level of happiness, a general sense of well-being. And though she had the benefit of a supportive husband during this transition, she also at times resented the fact that the disruption to his life seemed to pale in comparison to hers.

As a clinical psychologist, Molly knew her experience was a normal response to a life-changing event. But without the advantage of such a perspective, many of the patients she treated in her private practice grappled with self-doubt, guilt, and fear and suffered the dual pain of not only the struggle to adjust, but also the overwhelming shame for struggling at all.

In To Have and to Hold, Molly explores the complex terrain of new motherhood, illuminating the ways it affects women psychologically, emotionally, physically, and professionally - as well as how it impacts their partnership. Along with the arrival of a bundle of joy come thorny issues such as self-worth, control, autonomy, and dependency. And for most new mothers, these issues are experienced within the context of an intimate relationship, adding another layer of tension, conflict, and confusion to an already challenging time.

As Molly examines the inextricable link between women’s well-being as new mothers and the well-being of their relationships, she offers guidance to help listeners reclaim their identities, overcome their guilt and shame, and repair their relationships. A blend of personal narrative, scientific research, and stories from Molly’s clinical practice, To Have and to Hold provides a much-needed lifeline to new mothers everywhere.

©2019 Molly Millwood (P)2019 HarperCollins Publishers

What listeners say about To Have and to Hold

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A must read for all new mums

As a new mum of a 5month old baby I found this book so eye opening and helped me put words to feelings. the narration was clear, easy to listen to and appropriate for the theme

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Must read for all mothers (new and old)

I would recommend this book to all mothers, first, second or third time! The ideas and analysis provided by the author are eloquently expressed and easy to digest. The voice was also insightful and made me reflect on my own experiences.

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Not a feel good read - but that's the point

Not a fun topic to read/listen at all because the subject matter is quite pessimistic, but this book is important for tampering unrealistic expectations of parenthood. I think new mothers could find this book to be really comforting.

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Much needed perspective

Incredibly relevant. Really helped explain so much of what I was feeling and why on this journey into motherhood and how much it is normal that goes unsaid. You are not alone.

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