Sometimes I Cry in the Shower: A Grieving Father's Journey to Wholeness and Healing cover art

Sometimes I Cry in the Shower: A Grieving Father's Journey to Wholeness and Healing

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Sometimes I Cry in the Shower: A Grieving Father's Journey to Wholeness and Healing

By: R. Glenn Kelly
Narrated by: R. Glenn Kelly
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About this listen

You are here because you know, somewhere inside, it is truly time to begin the journey forward.

You are a man who has experienced the profound loss of someone you love dearly. Feeling despondent? Lost? It could not be more understandable. After all, you had a blueprint for your future mentally and emotionally drawn out ahead of you, which included that someone you love so dearly. That was the future you had planned on...laid your dreams on!

Then, suddenly, your blueprint was brutally ripped away, and you were left not only anguishing for that one you lost but also wondering, “Where do I go from here?”

As a man, do you feel that instinctive urge to keep all those emotions within grief stuffed deeply inside, where no one will think you unmanly and weak? Do you feel it is wrong to have an urge to seek out those tasks and activities that allow you to organize, systemize, and put yourself in control of something after the loss? Anything?

These are not wrong responses. Instead, they are natural reaction of who you are. However, they can be incredibly unhealthy and destructive if not acknowledged, understood, and addressed.

Women, do you want to understand your man? If the two of you sadly lost a child, do you think he loved that precious gift less because he does not openly cry as often as you, or seemingly not at all? Do you understand why, at times, he puts his own grief aside to care for others or crawl off to contemplatively spend time alone?

Men grieve and hurt as deeply as women, yet men and women are programmed through both nature and nurture to do so in a different manner.

©2015 R. Glenn Kelly (P)2018 R. Glenn Kelly
Grief & Loss Personal Success Relationships

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Not just for men at all...

I, like the author explains in his lovely book on grieving, am just not the sort of person who likes to cry in front of others. Even though I'm female (a bit of a tomboy always though), and the author intended this book for men, I prefer to greive in private, with this audiobook, at 2am.

The author goes to great length to explain that men grieve differently than woman, and I think in most cases, he is correct. However, I grew up a homeless child, with a Slavic background, and lived 20 years in a viciously abusive relationship. Unlike the author, who said that he never expected the tradegy of his dear son's death, I have lived with one tragedy after another, and have hated God, myself, and humankind for a long time now. Similar to the author though, I see my own actions as either "weak" or "strong", and this has left me with a bitter grief inside, which I wasn't dealing with. I heard this author speak on a podcast, and something just clicked, strangely.

I smiled many times through this book. The author works out in his home gym, listening to a playlist which reminds him of his son; he sings off tune to the lyrics in between sets and sometimes, a tear will come. This is so relatable. I do the same.

The author is what society would call an Alpha Male -not someone who goes around bragging about it, but someone who just is. This brings a soothing, yet also warm and humerous tone to this book. I'm not an "alpha woman" (whatever the heck that means), but the author appears to have once lived by an underlying "death before dishonor" life motto, and this I relate to -homeless children, as I was once, do the same. The author laughs at the the "tough guy"or "jarhead" he used to be (and still is) and this gives his auidence the confidence that it's OK to laugh at the toughness that is pounded into males since birth too, without discarding it. A rare pathway indeed.

Whether male or female, if you are a grieving parent who just can't bring yourself to pick up one of those other grief books with the flowers on the front, I think you'll find something very worthwhile here.

Yes, I cry in the shower too... And alone in my bed room at 2am, with a photo of my little boy in my hands, while listening quietly to this book.

I wish you all peace and blessings in your grief journies.

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