First Comes Love cover art

First Comes Love

Preview

Try Premium Plus free
1 credit a month to buy any audiobook in our entire collection.
Access to thousands of additional audiobooks and Originals from the Plus Catalogue.
Member-only deals & discounts.
Auto-renews at $16.45/mo after 30 days. Cancel anytime.

First Comes Love

By: Tom Rasmussen
Narrated by: Tom Rasmussen
Try Premium Plus free

$16.45 per month after 30 days. Cancel anytime.

Buy Now for $21.99

Buy Now for $21.99

Confirm Purchase
Pay using voucher balance (if applicable) then card ending in
By confirming your purchase, you agree to Audible's Conditions Of Use and Privacy Notice and authorise Audible to charge your designated credit card or another available credit card on file.
Cancel

About this listen

Bloomsbury presents First Comes Love written and read by Tom Rasmussen.

Bitingly funny, infectiously inquisitive and ferociously sharp. Adored!' ATTITUDE

'A fascinating interrogation' GRAZIA

'An incisive, witty and moving look at marriage – as an achievement, a compromise, a selling-out, a practical solution' REFINERY29

It was one thing to get married when your parents, your neighbours, your community insisted on it, when a sacred union for heterosexuals was not just one option but the only option. It’s quite another to keep doing it in when free of that societal and religious pressure. What is the allure of an institution grounded in patriarchy, in elitism, in white supremacy in the West, an institution that invalidated all but one kind of love till quite recently? Why do so many of us fight against these social ills while also posting pictures of proposals on Instagram? Is it possible to be married while subverting the institution by doing it one’s own way, or is marriage having the last laugh after all?

Tom Rasmussen comes from a Northern, working class family, for whom marriage in the centrepiece of life. They are also a male-bodied, non-binary queer person in a relationship with a man.

Journeying through wildly different weddings, visits to wedding planners, interviews with the much-married, those who have questioned their decision to marry, and those who would never consider matrimony, this is an incisive, witty and moving look at marriage – as an achievement, a compromise, a selling-out, a practical solution. Tom Rasmussen examines what marriage means across the spectrum of sexuality and class, and what the future looks like for this most historic and universal of institutions.

'An incisive, compassionate probing of the pleasures and pitfalls of marriage ... A deft deconstruction of normativity today' DAZED

'Tom Rasmussen is a smart and accomplished storyteller ... Anyone – queer or straight – who's considering marriage, or for that matter anyone who's deeply in love should listen to this unputdownable book' KATE BORNSTEIN

'I love Tom Rasmussen and adore their writing' TRAVIS ALABANZA

'An interrogation and an investigation ... A deeply funny and optimistic listen' JUNO ROCHE

©2021 Tom Rasmussen (P)2021 Bloomsbury Publishing Plc
Comedy & Humour Marriage & Long-Term Partnerships Parenting & Families Marriage Witty Comedy Wedding Queer

What listeners say about First Comes Love

Average Customer Ratings

Reviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.

In the spirit of reconciliation, Audible acknowledges the Traditional Custodians of country throughout Australia and their connections to land, sea and community. We pay our respect to their elders past and present and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples today.