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BuyMort: Grand Opening: How I Became the Accidental Warlord of Arizona

Shopocalypse Saga, Book 1

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BuyMort: Grand Opening: How I Became the Accidental Warlord of Arizona

By: Damien Hanson, Joseph Phelps
Narrated by: Wayne Mitchell
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About this listen

Some predicted that the AI singularity would result in robots destroying the world. None of them ever understood that it was the sales algorithms they had to be afraid of.

After the arrival of the multiversal monopoly BuyMort, life got brutal. All systems were through BuyMort. All currency was through BuyMort. All sales were through BuyMort. You could resist, you could compete, but it didn’t really matter because in the end you used BuyMort—or you perished. BuyMort be praised.

But not everyone’s happy with the new system. Some, even, want to see it destroyed.

It’s quick. It’s convenient. And it will help people kill you and your family as readily as it will help them sell you knickknacks for a quick mortie. Because BuyMort doesn’t care about anything except the bottom line.

Enter Tyson Dawes, a no-cares slacker with a traumatic past, two wrinkled bucks in his wallet, and a crap job caretaking a crap campground in the desert sands of Arizona. He had a deal with the world. He didn’t change it, and it didn’t change him. Seemed simple enough. He liked it, anyway.

BuyMort changed all that the moment it let loose a torrent of alien entrepreneurs upon his planet, intent on selling everything that hadn’t been tagged through the system and classified as his private property.

When a man has little, he cherishes it. When that little is lost, he’ll do whatever it takes and change into whatever he needs to be able to get that little bit back.

©2022 Damien Hanson and Joseph Phelps (P)2023 Podium Audio
Dystopian Fiction Humorous Post-Apocalyptic Science Fiction Comedy

What listeners say about BuyMort: Grand Opening: How I Became the Accidental Warlord of Arizona

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refreshing

this is a tall glass of water in the litrpg genre I highly recommend

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Fun concept.

Pretty decent Gamelit. It feels like someone came up with a joke concept but then worked out how to make it actually work - the story gets surprisingly deep and interesting, even if the character doesn't always make the decisions I would have liked him to make.

Earth is integrated into a galaxy-wide superstore where a rogue Amazon-like system makes everything monetized, creates ads that pop up in your vision, and lets monsters and aliens invade.

Narration of male characters is great. Be warned that the romance is terrible, as is narration of the love interest. Just... So bad. You don't get much of it in book 1, but be the over-the-top Marylin Monroe breathy accent and clunky, forced attraction eventually made me put this series down (I lasted 3 books).

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10/10 would recommend

totally hooked can't wait for book 2.

unique story premise and great characters and narrator nailed it

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unique LitRPG

This is a great LitRPG for those who don't want all the stats all the time. The voice acting is great, and the story has a uniqueness that is fun and refreshing. Be a smart shopper and give this book a go, you'll probably enjoy it as much as I did, FIVE STARS!

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When Big Box Stores go Galactic,

This is an engaging and highly original take on the alien invasion, end of the world genre, The narrator for this series does a fantastic job bringing to life our anti-hero Tyson L, who is barely surviving as the underpaid and underworked caretaker at a 2-star campground in Arizona. Without warning, Earth becomes the newest location for the galaxy’s favourite consumer conglomerate BuyMort, With everyone and everything suddenly having access to 24/7 buying and selling across a multiverse of sellers and stores, society quickly collapses. Tyson, alongside some well-developed characters like his grouchy boss and old and new campground residents, desperately learn how to navigate this new world order. Earth becomes a pickers’ paradise where alien races snap up bargains from a doomed humanity, but Tyson soon learns that trying to bring down BuyMort means he must first become a SmartShopper (tm).

The pacing, plot and writing for this series debut is top notch, with my only quibble being an all-too-convenient literary escape hatch appearing just in time during the book’s rollicking end game sequence. That’s a minor issue in an otherwise fantastic story. Be a SmartShopper and become a BuyMort Affiliate today (4.5 stars).

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