And Baby Makes Three cover art

And Baby Makes Three

The Six-Step Plan for Preserving Marital Intimacy and Rekindling Romance After Baby Arrives

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And Baby Makes Three

By: John M. Gottman PhD, Julie Schwartz Gottman PhD
Narrated by: Randye Kaye
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About this listen

Having a baby is a joyous experience, but even the best relationships are strained during the transition from duo to trio. Lack of sleep, never-ending housework, and new fiscal concerns often lead to conflict, disappointment, and hurt feelings. In And Baby Makes Three, Love Lab™ experts John Gottman and Julie Schwartz Gottman teach couples the skills from their successful workshops, so partners can avoid the pitfalls of parenthood by:

  • Maintaining intimacy and romance
  • Replacing a culture of criticism and irritability with one of appreciation
  • Preventing postpartum depression
  • Creating a home environment that nurtures physical, emotional, and mental health as well as cognitive and behavioral development for your baby

Complete with exercises that separate the "master" from the "disaster" couples, And Baby Makes Three helps new parents positively manage the strain that comes along with their bundle of joy.

©2007 John M. Gottman, PhD, and Julie Schwartz Gottman, PhD (P)2017 Tantor
Love, Dating & Attraction Marriage & Long-Term Partnerships Parenting & Families Mental Health

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Disappointed

Hoped for more from the Gottmans - a disappointing, gender normative listen. And no new wisdom beyond all the existing guidance for a good relationship.

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terrible

Highly unrealistic conversations. 50% of the book is lists of various feelings. If you have a highly volatile relationship this may help. But if you are looking to stay connected to your partner youd be better off spending actual time with them rather that wasting 7+ hours on this book.

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Old fashioned

I was really looking forward to this book. We attended a Gottman seminar during my pregnancy and found it was the best education session we’d attended. Unfortunately this book feels outdated and out of touch.

If you’re a couple in conflict with very undeveloped communication skills you may find some valuable information but a lot of it was very common sense to me.

The whole book feels as though it’s not been updated since 1955, it’s heteronormative and appears to be based on the premise that fathers go to work each morning and mothers stay at home with the children, or at best work part time.

It fails to analyse modern family trends even amongst heterosexual couples in which both parents are required to work or maintain a career. It also fails to address the disconnected society that couples are trying to raise their family in.

This book needs a rewrite.

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2 people found this helpful

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