An Unlikely Funeral
Be Careful What You Wish For
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Narrated by:
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Ink Arnadine
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By:
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K. L. Smith
About this listen
The hilarious new comedy from the author of Flight of the Cuckoo and The P**e in the Jam Tart.
The newsreader took a breath and began: “And here we have the remarkable tale of local man George Pimpton, who sadly died last week at the grand old age of 96. It’s only since his passing that locals have realized they had a reclusive celebrity in their midst. His story has captured the attention of the nation, and people are fascinated that such a man had been quietly living down an unassuming terraced street, keeping himself to himself. All week people have been coming out in droves to lay flowers outside of his house, and to give donations to his favorite charity—Guide Dogs for the Blind.”
The only problem was, this was all an accidental lie. George Pimpton was no celebrity. He’d never done anything remotely interesting with his life and had spent the last 30 years of his unremarkable existence laid in bed watching daytime TV and picking at his bellybutton fluff. Upon his death, his well-intentioned—though often misguided—neighbors simply wanted to jazz up his obituary to make his life sound a little more interesting, a well-meant gesture that quickly got drastically out of hand due to the perils of social media.
After Paul McCartney mistakes George for someone else and sends a farewell tweet to his “old friend”, this celebrity endorsement sets off a chain reaction that can't be reigned back in. It also didn’t take long for other celebrities to start coming out of the woodwork with half-remembered stories about George. After all, anyone who was anyone had a story to tell about old George…and now the world was watching, and waiting to hear just what would be in that eulogy….
©2020 Kerry Louise Smith (P)2022 Kerry Louise Smith